If you're a parent would you think this was ridiculous if I pulled you aside after school for this?

Most sensible post on this thread.

From a teacher's point of view I wouldn't bother telling a parent about it. You witnessed it, you dealt with it at the time, no further action was needed IMO.

As for all the mumsneters who don't see a difference between slaughtering a chicken for food and stamping on a bug for a second of entertainment...

honestly , unless this child did it non stop I would completely brush this off and think this teacher lacks perspective in how to deal with young kids .
I kill big spider in the home , some would be horrified by this . I always picket them up to put outside until one day one literally jumped on my chest and went inside my clothes . I can’t do it anymore . I would never hurt one outside but the house I find it impossible .

Wonder how people would feel about the teacher giving a lesson about the cruelty of the dairy industry and explaining what really happens to cows and their babies - and then giving behaviour points out for children drinking milk purely for their own pleasure when they don't need to?

A five year old is definitely aware of what they are doing and if brought up properly they know that treading on bugs on purpose is cruel. All my children knew this from a young g age and if they had of done this I would want to be told without a doubt

If the kid's irrationally scared of bugs and one suddenly appears, they might stamp on it to get rid of it without thinking it through.

My older two kids were either indifferent or interested about bugs at this age, but I've only just managed to get my 5 y/o to not stamp on random bugs.

I have a child with SEN who loves animals and has understood from around that age (I think even younger) that hurting them is cruel. Based on that, a (presumably) NT 5-6 year old should absolutely understand that it is cruel. I would not necessarily expect a teacher to report home about it but can understand why you did. As a parent I would appreciate being told and would use it as an opportunity to talk with DC about the importance of being kind.

I have a child with SEN who loves animals and has understood from around that age (I think even younger) that hurting them is cruel. Based on that, a (presumably) NT 5-6 year old should absolutely understand that it is cruel. I would not necessarily expect a teacher to report home about it but can understand why you did. As a parent I would appreciate being told and would use it as an opportunity to talk with DC about the importance of being kind.

I think you should report that post by @Theemeperorsnewclothes as a personal attack OP.

I remember a teacher pulling me over after school to tell me my 3 year old daughter had pulled the paper casing off a crayon!!! 🖍️ Your comment is up there with utterly ridiculous....

We crossed posts and have said almost exactly the same thing! I agree: you can’t reduce some issues down to a hard and fast rule and by trying to you gloss over too much.

Tell me you’re a vegan without telling me you’re a vegan…

Putting spiders outside is basically a death sentence.

Myth: "I'm very kind to spiders; when I find one in the house, I put it back outside instead of killing it."
Fact: You can't put something "back" outside that was never outside in the first place. Although some house spider species can survive outdoors, most don't do well there, and some (which are native to other climates) will perish rather quickly when removed from the protective indoor habitat. You're not doing them a favor.
In any case, house spiders are mostly harmless and beneficial. Human property rights mean nothing to other species. There was spider habitat for millions of years where your home is now. My advice is, "just wave as they go by."

Yes I would. Especially if the school was serving up meat for lunch.
I've killed bugs as an instant reaction from fear when I see them. Maybe this child's parents have done the same so he thought nothing of it.
I do actually feel bad when I kill a bug but I wouldn't be judging someone else who didn't.

I’d want to know. A childhood friend used to kill bugs for fun, then hamsters…we lost touch but I’ve since learned he’s a terrifying human being you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley !

This is a worrying trend in our society.

This post very much reflects the kinds of nuances that I also think are tricky for a child that age. Tbh even for me as an adult I can have mixed feelings at times. Nature is a wondrous system that is greater and more complicated than we can really fully grasp in one sweep. I often think this when reading a story about, say, an owl finding a nice mouse for supper. Yay! Nice owl has been fed and can fly home to her cute fluffy babies and vomit it up. But then pick up the next book to read them a story about Brambly Hedge mice and the thought of some great feathered beast swooping in and scooping up little Primrose mouse seems suddenly horrific.

It’s too layered and multi-faceted a topic for the sort of simplistic, black and white thinking you are trying to superimpose into it - and, like this poster, I’d actually be irritated about the behaviour point.

This, excellent response. The OP's black and white thinking is quite troubling, because as @seagullsky says, this is a nuanced situation.

Mountain out of molehill. If the kid is a psycho there will be far bigger signs than squishing a bug. Fine, pull them up on it but I would be very surprised indeed to be pulled aside about it in isolation from any other behavioural issues

Is eating meat psychopathic? After all it's not necessary and it's essentially just for taste pleasure. It's perfectly possible to thrive without eating any animal products.

Yes I agree the type of bug makes a difference.

Ticks, fleas and mosquitoes often need killing as they present safety risks - sometimes significant. And mice / rats and flies in homes are also not hygienic.

It’s a lovely ideal but life is more nuanced than that so I think if you mentioned it quite a few parents might find it OTT.

I think wantonly killing bugs is cruel, and I’d be glad a teacher pulled this up.

If we kill anything at home - carpet moths, or setting mousetraps - I always explain to my son first why it’s justified. We rescue spiders from the bath.

I understand that there’s a cultural element - because we live in the UK - but it’s important to be sensitive to our environment and fellow creatures. I’m in Scotland, and for that reason (possibly for that reason alone!) I’m glad all the school kids read Robert Burns “To a moose”.

I'd only expect to be told if my child was actively seeking out bugs to squish and it was a pattern. As a one-off event I'd just expect the teacher to say at the time something like "remember we talked about being kind to nature" and then take it no further. I wouldn't be thrilled about them getting a behaviour point.

Rules around bugs are hard for children as they are so context-dependent. In the last couple of weeks, I've praised my children for being gentle with the insects they found in the garden, but have also put down ant-bait to deal with an ant infestation in the house. We currently have a problem with box-tree moths and advice is to hand-remove (and kill) the caterpillars if they are killing a tree (which is ecologically better than pesticides) - but if my children were just randomly squishing caterpillars I'd be unhappy and go on at them about respect for nature and the cycle of life.

It's all very well to say 'it's fine to kill if there's a good reason (e.g pest control, invasive species, causing damage or harm) but not for pleasure', but that's too subtle for a 5 year old to understand. What they see is "sometimes grown-ups stamp/poison bugs and it's okay, and sometimes they talk about gentle hands and loving nature. When I copied them stamping I got into trouble but then I went home and mummy swatted a fly."

I still remember when I was about 5, there were ants nests in the school playground. Some of the boys went and stamped on the ants because they thought it was funny and got told off (I was very upset as I loved watching ants). Then the teachers went out with a kettle and poured it over the ants nest. Clearly from the teachers' perspective, this was fine as they were dealing with a pest infestation whereas the boys were just being cruel, but from the children's perspective it made no sense at all.

If you addressed it at the time I'm not sure what you'd hope to achieve by telling the parent.

If they'd be thankful you told them, then they are the sort of parent who would address it with their kid if and when they saw them do it at home. So telling the parent is just laying it on for the kid.

If they'd roll their eyes, they are maybe the sort of parent who wouldn't care anyway.

Or they might be in the middle like me. I'd roll my eyes at this resulting in 'having a word', I'd be a bit disappointed in my child for doing it, as they'd have been brought up not to, but as it had been dealt with by the school that's the end of it for me. I'd listen to you, say thanks for letting me know, but that's all.

Something that can harm me - I will get rid of it (though I try to usher out of the window first.) A harmless spider or ant - cruel, disgusting behaviour

The absolute breathtaking hypocrisy. So when I was bitten by a spider and needed antibiotics, and the spider was subsequently killed (as a reflex by the way), I'm "cruel and disgusting" but you're not?!

When I was stung by a wasp and swatted it - didn't need ABs then - I'm "cruel and disgusting".