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AIBU?

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Original poster

If you're a parent would you think this was ridiculous if I pulled you aside after school for this?

517 replies

L4815162342 · 09/05/2024 22:34

I work in a school.

A 5/6 year old today trod on a small bug. He did this on purpose.

I'd like to say it was because he didn't know better but this was half an hour after a lesson on looking after the environment and things we could do to care for nature. Lots was mentioned about animals, etc.

I pulled the child up and spoke to him about his behaviour. He essentially received the equivalent of a bad behaviour point as a result.

If you were pulled aside after school as a parent and told about this incident would you think it was ridiculous?

I know people have different views, some would draw the line at hurting an animal the size of a cat, for example, but wouldn't bat an eyelash at killing a spider.

OP posts:
Giraffesandbottoms · 09/05/2024 22:47

ComtesseDeSpair · 09/05/2024 22:43

It’s a personal ethical view. Most people worm and flea their pets, is that cruel? Are mousetraps cruel? Swatting flies / fly paper? Slug pellets? Yes, many parents would think you were overstepping and at best, ignore you.

Edited

I killed many ants in my house today. I do not feel bad.

Original poster
L4815162342 · 09/05/2024 22:46

PragmaticWench · 09/05/2024 22:38

I would think the teacher didn't understand the emotional capabilities/limitations of a child that age. I'd nod, say 'oh dear' and carry on slowly explaining life and responsibilities as the child aged.

The teacher understands perfectly, thank you.

OP posts:
whyamiawakestillitssolate · 09/05/2024 22:45

Tricky one - the act of killing something for pleasure is definitely wrong so I think I’d want to be told - but we kill bugs as a society all the time - ant powder, fly swats, carpet beetles etc etc

Autumn1990 · 09/05/2024 22:45

Wouldn’t go down well in a rural area or for anyone who has an insect/rodent problem in their house.

Londonrach1 · 09/05/2024 22:45

Id want to know. At that age children know right and wrong.

tsmainsqueeze · 09/05/2024 22:45

I would want to know too if my child did this its a living creature which the child is well aware of from the lessons you have been teaching .

ComtesseDeSpair · 09/05/2024 22:43

It’s a personal ethical view. Most people worm and flea their pets, is that cruel? Are mousetraps cruel? Swatting flies / fly paper? Slug pellets? Yes, many parents would think you were overstepping and at best, ignore you.

stayathomer · 09/05/2024 22:43

A 5/6 year old would definitely know that’s not ok. I’d definitely want to be told

Ace56 · 09/05/2024 22:43

As an ex teacher I wouldn’t have told a parent about this. However I would have disciplined the child appropriately - he knew what he was doing was wrong.

OrangeLemonLime24 · 09/05/2024 22:42

I’d absolutely want to be told. No harming of any animal happens in this house so I’d see it as a really big deal if one of my children did this.

pinkstripeycat · 09/05/2024 22:42

I agree with you OP.

I am in my 50s and remember being 4 years old. I remember nursery where we learnt about trees, plants and insects as we had a nature areas on our playing field.

I knew at 4 it was cruel to kill an insect. I also knew to put back insects we found under rocks.

My 2 adult DC remember going on woodland walks when they were and me teaching them the same.

Its NOT hard for a 4 year old to understand this

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 09/05/2024 22:41

I think it totally depends on the parent! I've seen more than one parent squashing bugs without a second thought; I would want to know so I could deal with the behaviour, but a parent who happily squashes bugs would probably think you were being ott.

TeenLifeMum · 09/05/2024 22:41

If it was a one off, I wouldn’t mention it. You dealt with it so what’s the parent supposed to do hours later. If dc regularly kills bugs then mention it.

spirit20 · 09/05/2024 22:41

I would mention it. At 5 or 6, they do have the capacity to know that that will cause pain to a creature and it's good to have that message reinforced at home as well as in school.

Temporaryname158 · 09/05/2024 22:39

I’d want to be told. At 5/6 and after those lessons I’d think purposely killing a living creature was cruel.

PragmaticWench · 09/05/2024 22:38

I would think the teacher didn't understand the emotional capabilities/limitations of a child that age. I'd nod, say 'oh dear' and carry on slowly explaining life and responsibilities as the child aged.

Welovecrumpets · 09/05/2024 22:38

Is this for real?