If you're a parent would you think this was ridiculous if I pulled you aside after school for this?

I would make a distinction between deliberately killing a creature for a reason eg it's a parasite/health hazard/ annoying/ food and killing one for no reason at all just because you can.

I kill wasps who hang around our food because my kids are scared of them and have been stung. I kill snails and slugs and caterpillars who destroy plants I'm trying to grow. I spent 15 minutes last night trying to catch and release a fly that was buzzing round and preventing my daughter going to sleep, eventually killed it because it wouldn't be caught or fly out. I catch spiders and other harmless bugs in the house and put them outside. I would never see a bug on the floor and just kill it. In my experience most small children are fascinated by bugs and I do think squashing one deliberately for no reason is to be criticised. Not sure it warrants speaking to parents tho.

What a ridiculous comment. I was raised in the country, as was my Dad, his parents, and generations before that. He taught me respect for nature, that harming creatures for no purpose is cruel and wasteful. Killing for food, or hygiene or to prevent damage to property or crops is one thing, (and should be done as quickly and humanely as possible) Deliberately stamping on a creature because you find it amusing is completely different.

I would expect the teacher to quietly take the child aside and gently remind him/her that the living creature had as much right to life as he did and there is no reason to kill it. I would remind him of the important job the creature does in its life cycle which indirectly affects …helps all of us.
At 6, a child is able to take that in but may still need a lot of reminders. Linking a class room lesson to real life situation is not always immediate for some six year olds.

This incident is not worthy of a bad behaviour point in my opinion. But instead, it’s an opportunity for the teacher to help and guide the child further. And keep an eye on his development if possible.

Some children are terrified of insects and need help to be tolerant of them.
Some parents will have modelled poor behaviour by killing insects with ant powder, fly repellent and by killing spiders, stamping on ants etc. The teacher should have had this awareness that not all parents have the same attitude towards bugs if they themselves haven’t had that sort of education.

One lesson on this is often not enough. It takes lots of gentle reminders and conversations for a child to suddenly develop empathy especially if there is little or no tolerance for nuisance insects in the home.

I would expect the teacher to mention to all parents that as part of the lesson, all children are being reminded to be tolerant and curious about the life cycles of insects. I would expect that unless the child were showing a tendency to be cruel in other areas too, this little incident on its own would not be worthy of a special mention to a parent and should not be thought of as bad behaviour …rather as an unthinking habit that could easily be helped.

Yes, without a further back-story about the child and if this is a first incident of it’s kind, I can understand why a parent might consider it ridiculous to be pulled aside to be told her child had received a bad behaviour point.

This.

This is bonkers. In my house we constantly have to kill mosquitoes and ants, otherwise we’re covered in huge bites and our food is infested.

I wouldn't expect to hear about it unless it was part of a bigger picture. I guess you would be extra vigilant to look out for signs - as I would as a parent.

Spider that crawled over your face while you sleep.
Shudder.😬
If that was my room it would have been turned it upside down i dont think id have much of a room left TBH.
While screaming DIE DEVIL BUG my neighbours hate me in the summer.

We’re vegan, so would want to know as being kind to animals will definitely be part of how we bring DD up.

A child deliberately killing a bug is very different to an adult not wanting an ant infestation in their home

I'd want my child to be told off for this, and I'd want them to explain why its wrong. I'd expect the teacher to inform me, so I can keep an eye on them in the garden.

I would ignore you tbh, in the context of it being an insect rather than a bigger animal. You also don’t know what goes on at home and what the kid has seen.

My DH killed a bunch of ants in this week in my house as we had an infestation.

I killed a spider a few months ago that crawled over my face while I was asleep in bed.

In my home its me or the bug i will take them down.
In summer im flapping a fly smacker around.
I have already got my fly/bug stickers up.
Some nights its war with moths and daddy long legs.😂

My four year old pulled a worm in two infront of other children and made them cry. He was reprimanded at school and at home. Just not acceptable behaviour. It was a straightforward life lesson and we moved on.

I'm a vegan and love animals and I would think it was ridiculous. A child squashing an insect is not a future psychopath. If it was part of a pattern of worrying behaviour it would be different.

It's hard to say given I kill the aphids sucking the life force of out my plants with my bare hands. Spiders and worms get a pass from me but flies and cockroaches are fair game.

As a parent I would definitely want to be told. The most important moral for my family in life is to be kind to other living creatures. At that age he is perfectly capable of understanding that.

@L4815162342

Depends! I was looking at a ladybird with a group of children, and one child seemed a quite intent on squishing it. This child also needs support empathising with other children - so if the squish was part of a bigger picture : e.g. I’m going to squish for attention, I’m going to squish and ignore what I’ve just been told : then of course tell the parent. But I’d focus more on the behaviour behind the bug squish than the bug squish.
And a parent dismissing a bug squish may happen, but a parent dismissing a lack of empathy in their child or condoning defiant behaviour shouldn’t happen.

I think it can be confusing for a child. It’s ok to pick a daisy, but not other flowers. It’s ok to squish a mosquito but not other bugs. Why? Because some bugs/flowers are deemed more valuable/nicer/prettier to humans than others?? And who are we to decide who lives/dies in this world based on what pleases/displeases us!!!

You wouldn't tell the parent if the child said something unkind to another child as a one off or wouldn't share or demanded the red crayon. You dealt with it in the same way. It's done.

I'd be really irritated if someone mentioned that to me.

Lots of 5 year olds won’t have any reason to think killing a bug is ‘wrong’ and neither would lots of adults. Just look in any hardware store and you will be able to buy bug spray, ant powder, fly paper, mouse traps, rat poison, fly swatters etc. Lots of children will have been raised in households where killing small pests, including killing them on sight is seen as completely normal. Your child may have been brought up to see it as ‘wrong’ but that’s because it’s a moral you’ve instilled, the idea that killing a bug is ‘wrong’ is not a fact or something which would be shared by every family or instilled in every 5 year old.

You’re being unreasonable to think a moral you ascribe to (killing bugs is ‘wrong’) is universal and that therefore the child should have known better. Killing bugs will have been normalised in many households because many adults won’t see any issue with it and will actively go out of their way to eliminate any bugs from home or garden.

I would think you were being rediculous , a telling off is enough .

Do you have experience of children of this age? I work with 4 & 5 year olds but have also taught Year 1 and of course they have the capacity. 3 year olds can tell you why you don’t kill an insect and show empathy for the killed insect.

The expectations of children are so low and it really shows in the children. The amount of times I’ve heard ‘They don’t understand’ from a parent, who genuinely seems baffled that I’d expect their child not to smack someone across the face, is shocking.

I would want to know, DS has been rescuing 'mini beasts' as he calls them since he could walk. If he did something like this it would be very very out of character.

I don't really understand the responses on here from people who deliberately kill bugs, why? They're not doing you any harm, there's a spider in the bath, move it. Only takes a second. I'm sure I step on ants etc without realising but I wouldn't just walk up and jump on a snail, how odd.

As a fellow teacher, I would say that the OP absolutely does understand the emotional capabilities / limitations of a child of that age.

I wouldn't expect a member of staff to report the squashing of a bug to me as a parent, but I would expect them to report the behaviour point, and explain why it was given.

I can’t bear spiders etc and my life is a misery in Autumn term when all the crane flies are about… they seem to like school buildings!!!
But I have to suck it up and try and be brave because, however I might deal with it at home, understandably, I need to show respect for living creatures. (That doesn’t mean I go killing things at home, unnecessarily ,before you all jump on me!!)

Spiders - it depends how big they are if I have to call for assistance!! Everything else I will make an effort to waft out of a window or a door using a bit of paper or a book.
I hate it when we do any kind of mini beast project, but it’s my job! Somehow I manage to cope even though I’m screaming inside!!

I wouldn’t tell a parent unless it was a repeated action over several occasions and clearly a pattern.