To be concerned with how my boyfriend acted when I was ill?

Sorry but I think YABU.

It's a cold. How do you think people on their own manage?

Those flu drinks are just paracetamol with antihistamine to make you drowsy. If you'd had the cold for 2 days already why didn't you buy some paracetamol/lemsip yourself earlier in the day?

I opened the thread expecting it to be about him being nasty to you while you were ill, which is a thing, but this doesn't sound like that at all. If anything it's your behaviour that's red flag territory.

Christ, it's you not him. Totally unreasonable.

The no expiry date on one tablet

dump him - you’re not compatible, did ge say he wanted you to look after him when he was ill? You can’t expect the same back - maybe he’s he’s not like that. Personally I think you’re being a bit entitled - he’s not your runner for medication.

I'm not sure why you asked if you were being unreasonable as every reply you've made since indicates that you are unwilling to even consider that you might be. Incidentally that's an indicator for the same type of princessy behaviour some posters are suggesting you may have exhibited when ill.

Anyway, let's look at the evidence.

You had a runny nose and sore throat, but felt OK only hours before. Even at your worst you felt it would be fixed by a lemsip - you weren't for example telling him you needed to go to hospital. You weren't so ill that it kept you up all night, and even without the lemsip you managed to get to sleep. You say you were delusional but I'm really not buying it - if you were delusional you needed medical assistance not lemsip, plus you'd have mentioned it in your first post. So, in summary, you had a nasty cold but were actually OK even without the lemsip.

Your boyfriend went out twice to try to find you medication- in spite of it being a foreign country, late at night and him having work the next morning. On the second occasion you turned your nose up at what he had brought back for you because it wasn't exactly what you wanted.

In your shoes I would never have asked or expected a partner to go out for a lemsip in those circumstances. I wouldn't expect it at home to be honest, I certainly wouldn't expect it abroad- I'd have just waited until the next day. After two attempts to find medication i certainly wouldn't have asked or expected him to go out a third time.

In his shoes, I wouldn't have gone. I'd have gone the first time, but a third time? For a lemsip? No chance.

What would you have done if you were there alone OP?

I had a fever a few months ago back now of 39.8 and I was fairly delusional 🤣🤣 I was rushed in to recuss with suspected sepsis and turned out I had the flu 🙈
I was less delusional after meds bought my temp down

This.

He tried really hard. He found yoh something to take too. You sre being a bit of a diva

You've got a cold not having a medical emergency

He tried to get you medication at a pharmacy and at reception. He messaged the next day, whilst he’s working, This sounds like a cold, which can make you feel really gritty and miserable but you sound really dramatic about it. I think he did ok tbh. Your expectations just don’t align.

Perhaps boyfriend had had a drink and so couldn’t drive ?

This, you wanted lemsip!!. It sounds like some bonkers test to prove his worth of you..
'No I don't want to have dinner, I want to stay in and not eat..."what how dare you not ask what I want to eat"..

I'm sorry about your upbringing, this situation was obviously triggering for you, but you can't expect someone who hasn't had that experience to molly coddle you over a cold. He did everything right, he got out of bed to look for medication, but you refused it because it wasn't wrapped (fair enough). This wasn't a holiday for him, it was a work trip and you were being a bit ott. Its about what you need in a relationship though, and if you aren't giving each other what you need then you end it.

It sounds like a little from column A, a little from column B. He definitely could have been more sympathetic, and does sound like he was being a bit snippy (and I'm not sure what bringing one random unmarked pill was about!). But it sounds like you were being a bit overdramatic (if your fever was so high you were delusional, I think you need a doctor not a lemsip!) and are understandably highly sensitive to these situations due to your past.

In the UK my DH can and has driven 30mins to the nearest 24hr supermarket to buy me medicine when I've had extremely bad IBS flare ups. I'm not sure I would expect him to if abroad - the fact your boyfriend did try I think is a good sign. And he probably didn't tell you about his foot to avoid stressing you out further. There's also a difference between driving around in daylight to driving to a random pharmacy in the night.

On balance, I think he could have behaved better but you're being a bit unreasonable.

I couldn’t deal with this level of fuss and drama over minor illness, I’d be out.

I'm on team boyfriend here.

He went out late to buy you some, managed to get something from reception,they weren't good enough and you wanted him to drive at 11pm to buy you a hot drink sachet with more than likely the same ingredients.

Yes he sounds a bit grumbly, but surely you bring your own paracetamol with you when you go away ( what with that being the active ingredient in Lemsip) ? It's hard to extrapolate what he'd be like if you were properly unwell, but this does seem like a bit of melodrama on your side.

If you had a fever so high you were delusional, you should have been calling for an ambulance, not a lemsip!

Yikes OP that is not good at all I will never forget the time me and my DH newlyweds on our honeymoon I was sick one day and without fuss he jumped into a cab and went to a big supermarket that had a pharmacy to get me meds and plenty of stuff like drinks and snacks for when I would want them etc never once did he kick off that he had to leave me at hotel to go and get me meds.

He has always been like that from day we first got together another time we had just literally started to see each other and I had fallen hurt my ankle so was on crutch's which meant I couldn't drive to see him as planned instead he came to me no fuss etc

I've done the same with him when he's fallen ill or had injuries I think it's important in any relationship to know you're going to support one another when one of you may be unwell etc.

Mate, the stuff that works in the Lemsip is paracetamol.
You might get a bit of relief from the rest of the ingredients but essentially it’s paracetamol.
You sound like a bit of a pain in the ass when you’re ill. Something to reflect on?

He sounds exasperated but he did traipse out in the night on holiday to get you mild painkillers for a common illness. Cut him some slack!

He was undoubtedly an arse. But to be honest, if you were really that sick you needed a doctor, not Lemsip.

Another one struggling to see what he did wrong.

You had a bad cold. Even though it was late and he had to get up at 6:30 for work, he went to the store. The tablets he brought back were not good enough.

He contacted you the next day from work to see if you were OK. But apparently that’s not good enough.

You said you didn’t want dinner, but then were annoyed that he didn’t bring you dinner.

There are loads of red flags here but for him, not you. You’re 30 and had a cold.

I’ve had an awful illness recently - felt worst I have in years. I ran out of non-caffeine containing flu type capsules (helpful because of the decongestant) at night so took a paracetamol until the morning. We have a Tesco 5 mins away but no way would I ask dh to go out for that late at night.

Having a temperature doesn’t make you delusional.

And if I felt too ill to eat I would expect dh to go out (& would ask him to bring me back some fruit if possible).

You do sound quite hard work tbh - it’s not like you had kids that needed looking after that he left entirely to you. You were able to rest

The problem is, it’s hard to tell whether this is a red flag because the situation you describe is such a non-event.

You have a cold and suddenly decide that the only thing that will do, late at night in a foreign country, is a packet of lemon flavoured powdered paracetamol and artificial sweetener. When this proves not easy to get, you continue to make a fuss until your boyfriend goes to reception to get you some painkillers. You then reject the painkillers, have a cup of tea and go to sleep.

The next day, while at work, he texts you to check in on you and then comes back to the hotel to discuss food. You tell him you don’t want anything. He goes out to get himself some. You are cross with him for this because he doesn’t ask if you want anything. Clearly, you telling him you didn’t want anything was a secret trap because you in fact wanted a four course meal which he was supposed to guess?

I hope your cold’s getting better, but you might want to wait to see how he behaves when you’re actually unwell and in need of proper support before getting rid.

Crikey op, I think id be a bit perved off with you aswell. You have a cold, and you've got him running round going to chemist's at 11pm and acting as if you can't move, it's all a bit dramatic don't you think??

OP will be type of person. to expect the world to stand still and be at her beck at call if she ever becomes pregnant

poor guy

You beat me to it - she couldn’t call reception herself? Jesus.