To be concerned with how my boyfriend acted when I was ill?

He had an attitude the whole time like she was inconveniencing him by being ill. A cold is still unpleasant and I usually try and make my loved ones’ lives more pleasant where I can. And they’d do the same for me. Even if I don’t have the plague, which is apparently the only time you’re allowed sympathy.

Still very glad I’m not married to any of these stoic martyrs with zero empathy for people they care about.

The OP had a sore throat and runny nose, not Ebola.

OP you sound ridiculous I'll be honest. 'Tablets don't work for me' well the rest of the world will take 2 paracetamol and get on with it. You had a common cold. I guess he could've got you honey and lemon from the shop, but you sound hard work.

Perhaps it was because of the time of day.
Is he the type of guy that needs his sleep? My husband is gets terribly grumpy with anything that disturbs his sleep ( hes the total opposite normally), which has meant that I've done all the nights with our children. I'm a lighter sleeper so I've been fine with that.

I suppose what you're worried about is that he lacks sympathy for when you DO need him. It sounds like he did try, which seems promising to me.

The longer you are together the more you will discover about each other and better understand weaknesses etc.

I always carry a little pouch for what ifs wherever I go e.g pain relief/plasters.

Hope you feel better soon. X

I hate incompetent partners, especially when ill however I don't think he did anything wrong

It sounds like he got up and went to the shop really quickly. What medicine did you want? Paracetamol would help a temperature, not sure why you are saying that wouldn't work... If I don't have lemsip, some warm water/tea and popping a tablet down will do the same job.

Op has stated that she does not usually fall ill, so it is not as though she is the type of person who is always moaning about minor illnesses.
Op admits that she was being slightly difficult, but was obviously feeling really unwell.
Her dp, shouldn’t have to be told to source some medicine, he should have insisted on this
I was in Cyprus with my dh last year and could barely move as I had muscle pain. It was about 4am in the morning and we didn’t have any pain relief.
Dh went straight down to reception but they didn’t have any pain relief. He was told that he would have to wait until the pharmacy opened which was about 9am.
Meanwhile he massaged my back until I slept.
I woke up to my dh holding a snack and some painkillers. He had arrived at the pharmacy before it had even opened.
He would have done the same thing even when we were dating.

And what would have been ops reason for being delusional if not her fever ?

OP had a cold, not bubonic plague. Her boyfriend tried twice to help her, at night, even though he had to get up early for work the next day, but she's still moaning because he couldn't find lemsip in a foreign country at 11pm. Someone here does sound selfish, but it's not the boyfriend.

You can be delusional for lots of reasons, you don't need a temp of 42 specifically

'lovey' ??

Did you have a cold?

But there was no mental load on his part. He didn't suggest calling down to reception offer to make a tea any form of support take took brain space.

For me, it's a big red flag. In life there are going to be situations were you won't get to have your routine, lost sleep, extra work load because your part of a team/ family.

Yeah but OP wasn't delusional. Deluded maybe....

Sorry OP - I know you’re feeling sick and wiped out but I think you’re in the wrong here. It’s a cold, but from the way you’ve reacted you’d think you had severe food poisoning or a hospital visit.

It’s silly and unreasonable to expect someone to get up out of bed to go looking for Lemsip. By your own admission you had a hot cup of tea and went to sleep so you weren’t that bad. At most you could have asked him to get up and make the tea or to soak a hot cloth for you to put over your face. It just sounds like you don’t get sick often and when you do you’re a misery.

Why didn’t you (or your partner) just ask for some lemon and honey downstairs at reception, and drink it with hot water? That and some sleep would have tided you over until morning.

I totally agree
Even if Op was being a pain in the arse, the fact is they have only been together for 18 months .This is supposed to be the honeymoon period

I have been with dh for many years and he would drive miles if it meant that I was comfortable for the night , despite him having a demanding career.

in Tokyo with my ex-husband he went to an internet cafe, got a translation for medication and went to 4 pharmacy’s and bought a bunch of stuff to try to help me when I was ill. I’m pretty sure current DP would do similar. I don’t think you princessey. This is what you can expect as others have said imagine you’re struggling with a wee baby. I’d ditch him

Having a fever does make you delusional??

You may have been in a commonwealth country but this is irrelevant. Paracetamol containing products can actually be quite difficult to get in some countries and lemsip particularly is quite a British thing.

I am another who is astounded that anyone travels without a small supply of first aid including paracetamol!? And also if you were already unwell in the day and you know "only lemsip works for you (!?)" why didn't you go and get some earlier so you could take some before bed?

You are 30 years old and he is not your parent?

You sound a bit needy. If you have such specific requirements when you get ill you should buy medication and take it with you just in case.

Why not take paracetamol and ibuprofen? Or get lemon and honey from reception? I don't see why it had to be this lemsip type thing.
And surely it couldn't have become so grave in the space of 15mins? I think he did his best in the circumstances. If it was a more serious illness that warranted more specific or stronger medication, then I'd say he should have gone to the pharmacy, but not really for the remedy you were seeking. Also, he had a sore foot, which might explain why he didn't want to go.
I hope you can see it's difficult sometimes to deal with other people's illness.

Next time you go away take medication with you . Lesson learned .

YABU.
Sounds like you had a cold. You need to get abit more resilient.
i wouldn’t have expected my boyfriend to drive around at 11pm when he had to be up for work at 6:30. If I felt as unwell as you claim you were I would have accepted the paracetamol.

YABVU I can’t belive some people are acting like your behaviour was normal and justified. Even if I was at home i would never ask DH to get out of bed/ his evening wind down at 11pm at night to go find somewhere open selling lemsip or equivalent! I would be massively appreciative that he had already made one trip down/out for you already!

And then to communicate “you didn’t feel like having dinner” but expect him to know you actually did want something but it brought back to you is just mad, he can’t mind read.

He also checked in on you during the day but your spin is to be negative and critical that he didn’t check more??!!

This all seems very imature and high maintenance and in my book gives red flags about you not him.

It's a cold

I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to call an ambulance for a runny nose.

Some people on here are so horrible, I’m glad they are not my partner. When my DH is ill or in need, I will do whatever to help him. Because I love him a d he would do the same for me. I can’t imagine not doing this for someone I care about. Height of selfishness.

What have i just read?
You wanted him to get out of bed and go and get you lemsip?
Just take a paracetamol