To be concerned with how my boyfriend acted when I was ill?

I crack on when I am ill but at least I know my DH is a caring man who would go and get me medicine if I asked him unlike the OP's OH.

I am far from a wimp and certainly do not want to be ponced over (bloody stupid phrase) so keep your ridiculous theories to yourself

no, it was not funny at all to see my husband so sick for over 6 weeks so I’m not gonna let you joke about that.

What’s wrong with you?

They did. Reception gave OP's boyfriend a tablet for her, but she refused to take it because she didn't know who had touched it, and tablets don't work for her anyway. Only lemsip does, apparently. 🙄

Yeah tbh neither DH or I care much when the other is ill, it just means the other one has more work to do and to put up with moaning. However, 99% of the time our relationship is perfect so I wouldn’t say it’s cause to end a relationship!

It did, but not the right kind apparently.

OP's version is very much that 'a version' much of her narrative doesn't stand up to too much scrutiny

What kind of hotel doesn’t have some kind of cold relief available?

Doesn’t matter what any of us think.

His version of taking care of you doesn’t match what you want or need.

Think carefully whether you can live with that.

I was sick for 9 days of our holiday once. My husband went out for dinner every night without me because he needed to eat and there was no point in both of us being miserable in the room.

He did get me medicines, drinks and yogurts and things though.

You have a cold, not pneumonia! You were well enough to work today, so not incapacitated. Why didn’t you go yourself to the pharmacy during the day if you felt rough? You sound like hard work and quite immature. He’s your boyfriend not your mum

You had a sore throat and a runny nose. You weren't very sick.

Why hadn't you gone out during the day and bought anything you might need? You sound really high maintenance to me, OP.

The difference of opinion is here is between people who just crack on with it when they have a cold and people who are wimps and want to be ponced over.

To be honest, if it feels like a red flag to you, it is one.

My husband is horrible, useless and uncaring, when anyone ( me) is ill, and when our children were born.

Im resigned to it, but i wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

There are nice caring people out there I’m sure.

Should have tried some hotel tea it's miraculous

Do you went to bed fine and 10:30, woke up 15 minutes later ill enough to get your bf to go out at night in an unfamiliar country to get you some medicine. He comes back with something unsuitable so you have a drink and go to bed.

if I was you bf I would be quite annoyed by now. You need to dial down the drama.

I'm not sure this is a gender thing, because I'd definitely not have done any more than OP's partner if my DH had a cold and I also wouldn't expect anyone to be scurrying around trying to source Lemsip for me at 11pm either. I'd also not get someone dinner if they told me they didn't want any - I can't be arsed to dance around trying to guess what someone wants, I like people to just be straight with me about their needs.

I do find it a bit pathetic when adults can't manage a cold or mild flu by themselves (my DH is a bit of a dressing-gown-wearing-shuffler when he has one which is borderline insufferable but usually only lasts a day thank goodness).

I do understand that OP's childhood probably means that she'd like some additional emotional support when she's feeling ill, but from what I can see her partner did provide that, it's just her expectations were a bit unreasonable.

Texting once or twice is a nice thing to do when someone's a bit poorly, but let's be realistic - it was a cold/light flu, it doesn't really warrant grave concern

The OP explained she felt very ill, there’s absolutely no reason to dispute that.

I'm disputing it.
The OP says daft things like, "I asked him if he could get me flu relief hot drink. It's the only thing that actually works for me."

Lemsips (or equivalent) contain nothing more than an ordinary dose of paracetamol...therefore, an ordinary dose of paracetamol was all that was required...much easier to come by at 11pm.
But no, she's special and the bloody Lemsip is the ONLY thing that works.

🙄

More princessy than she knows.

To everyone who replied to me: I don’t believe that driving 5 min to get medicine for your partner will ruin your sleeping routine or is synonym with a wild goose chase (or slavery! Fucking hell, that is an offensive comparison and I’d recommend looking up what slavery means before throwing that one around again). It’s something that I would be very happy to do for my DH and he would do for me as well, and growing up I also saw my parents doing the same sort of thing for each other on the regular. This is how I want to live my life, I honestly would not have it any other way, and I accept it’s not the same for everyone, but I very much understand where the OP is coming from and I send my solidarity to her.

He did she said she didn't want to eat

Feeling "very ill" doesn't give you the right to send someone on a wild goose chase for medication when they're trying to sleep, though, even if they are your husband.

OP had felt ill for a while yet waited until 11pm to demand lemsip. It would be different if she'd suddenly come over unwell but that's not the case here.

If my DH had felt rotten all day then told me I had go out at 11pm for lemsip I'd think he'd lost his marbles, frankly.

Ops time line is

I woke at 10.45 oh was not asleep yet....
So had to get up and dressed....then went to a chemist 2 mins away....but presumably out of bedroom down lift out into road then 2 mins.....asks for medication...then walks back up lift etc....thats got to make it at least 11.10 or later.....
Debate on no get me something else....back down lift talk to reception...root around for something....back in life....got to be at l wet 11.30....
Not good enough Google....5ins if he's on the ball....
Now at earliest 11.45 before she expects him to go back down lift find car drive the 5 mins then park them go in shop 12.15 ish....then drive back to room 12.30 ish....get undressed try to sleep ....after making the hot lemon...
Or more like find her snoring....
Asleep 1.15 or later up for that important work meeting that requires him to be flown to another continent so can't be as simple as hoovering a floor...at 6.30....
How can that be reasonable for a cold what planet are some of you on.

Don’t forget “fever” and “delusional”. (By which I think she actually meant “delirious”, though “delusional” is quite a good Freudian slip!)

It's probably just the use of language- but I can't deal with the "very sick" "suffocated" stuff. Are we talking about a cold here? And is it that unusual to go 18 months without being "very sick"?

My husband is great he's self employed but if I'm really ill he makes sure I've got everything when I was being treated for cancer he went to every appointment did all the housework, took over everything at Christmas, did all cooking etc while still working but no way would I have the nerve to say I've got a cold go out for the third time and get me something he was on a work trip you can't not be on top form for a work trip your company paid for because the other half has a blocked nose.

I'm guessing cancel work, lose his job while holding her hand and mopping her fevered brow

He got up at 6.30 am plus time difference and probably had the same alarm in the morning that's not much sleep after travel....
Not everyone stays up until midnight and if you're doing something important you need to be at your best....it was his work trip not a bloody holiday.
I get vomiting for over 24 hours with migraine and often end up in hospital a sniffle is not even worth moaning about....if you know colds are worse at night you make sure you go and get paracetamol at least it's part of being an adult and self care not an infant. He did go out twice she wanted him to go out again....then she managed a sleep through the night with a cup of tea.