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Original poster

Got pregnant early in a new relationship partner funny about abortion.

35 replies

leavingabusetoday · 08/05/2024 21:25

Basically what the title says I was in a new relationship it was going so well and the guy seemed lovely (I’ve known him years as a friend always been kind nice). I got pregnant and at first in the honeymoon stage I was like let’s have the baby after Few weeks my sickness started and it become real I have two children already and realised I need to be practical and not fairytail and put my babies first. My new parented is saying I’m eveik I medsed him around I care about everyone but him. I won’t change my mind about the abortion but I feel like I’ve done something really horrible and unkind have I?

OP posts:
Riverlee · 08/05/2024 21:34

He’s entitled to his feelings.

Original poster
leavingabusetoday · 08/05/2024 21:34

He wanted me to do the test before we went out for food as my period was late that was my oriiginal plan

OP posts:
Original poster
leavingabusetoday · 08/05/2024 21:33

StormingNorman · 08/05/2024 21:29

You are not being unreasonable for thinking sensibly about what is best for your family.

Gently, your partners hopes were raised and he was looking forward to being a dad. Now he needs time to process his feelings. His anger is somewhat natural and it will pass.

Edited

This is how I feel I went wrong but I genuinely did have feelings I just realised if I kept the baby my family would completely stop talking to me. He is already a dad and has children too. It would mean loads of kids together when we been together a few months it seemed cruel. And I had to make a choice for them. It hurts a lot and I wish I never said yes but he was so excited when I did the test and I got myself excited in the moment until I realised it all.

OP posts:
DaniMontyRae · 08/05/2024 21:33

It's your choice and you do need to put the children you already have first. I can, however, see why he is upset. He's spent weeks thinking he is going to be a dad and now he won't. It would have been kinder to have thought it through and decided what you were going to do before telling him and letting him get excited.

Hankunamatata · 08/05/2024 21:32

Your body your choice.

Your not evil. I can see both sides. You were all lets have a baby, he got all excited and started future planning in his head then you decide to terminate. I can understand why he feels he has been messed about and had the rug pulled from under him. Doesn't excuse calling you names.

You have to think of the kids you have and prioritise them

Notimeforaname · 08/05/2024 21:30

No, you have every right to choose. He will naturally be upset but to call you evil and uncaring is so wrong.

Ask him if he needs time and offer him that if you're looking to work on this but I personally would see his reaction as a clear cut sign to not peruse anything further with him. Way too red flaggy.

Im sorry he has not been supportive towards you.

takemeawayagain · 08/05/2024 21:30

It's your body, your choice of course. But surely you can see that it would be pretty upsetting to think you're having a child with someone, the other person be all for it as well - and then to have that suddenly taken away. You're not evil, that's ridiculous, but I can understand why he's very upset.

StormingNorman · 08/05/2024 21:29

You are not being unreasonable for thinking sensibly about what is best for your family.

Gently, your partners hopes were raised and he was looking forward to being a dad. Now he needs time to process his feelings. His anger is somewhat natural and it will pass.

Scammersarescum · 08/05/2024 21:28

Your body. Your choice.

That's it really

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 08/05/2024 21:28

Of course YANBU. You need to put your kids first and definitely don’t be guilted by a man out of having an abortion.

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