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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think i shouldn’t have to pay for her therapy l!?

64 replies

Auntieterrible · 08/05/2024 18:15

Long story short!!
I separated from my husband last year. My sil (exh’s) sister had a dad and she has found our separation really hard to come to terms with (she is 10) none of friends parents are separated, so this has blown her mind I suppose with how relationships can change. She is now an anxious mess about the possibility of her own parents separating. Dsil is at the end of her thether and is worried. She blames me (because I left the marriage) and she has messaged me saying dn needs therapy of some sort and I should be paying as it’s all my fault! I gave my own dc to look after, I have money for their therapy as and when they need it (not needed as of yet) Aibu to think DN’s struggle of not my responsibility? Please go easy.

OP posts:
Peaceandquietandacuppa · 08/05/2024 18:22

Your SIL should see if they do ‘buy one get one free’ at the local therapist office - she is being very unreasonable and maybe could do with talking to someone herself if she thinks this is a reasonable request!! Her poor DD having such a melodramatic mother, no wonder she isn’t coping with your news.

Createausername1970 · 08/05/2024 18:22

How strange. Whatever the reasons for the break up of the marriage, it's an issue between you, your ex and any children of your own.

If you have children, then I would respond politely as you may still have contact with her from time to time, But if you have no children and no plans to stay in touch, then pass her concerns to your ex.

KTheGrey · 08/05/2024 18:21

No, you have no obligation to look After your SIL's DD's anxiety. I wonder whether she's an anxious child to begin with, because it sounds like SIL is also quite anxious. Perhaps SIL should get some therapy.

Ikeaismyhappyplace · 08/05/2024 18:20

Not your responsibility at all, how ridiculous.

CharlotteLightandDark · 08/05/2024 18:19

well the kid was going to find out someday that sometimes couples split up.

almost all my kids friends parents aren’t together so I find it quite surprising that she’s gone almost all the way through primary school not having experienced this yet

SalmonEile · 08/05/2024 18:19

Honestly I started typing a response to try and rationalize SILs demand but no there’s no point … this is in no way your responsibility

Jiski · 08/05/2024 18:19

She needs to get a grip on reality. Relationships end and it’s not anyone else’s fault if she can’t handle it. She can get her own therapy.

Most big employers have employee assistance or she can get a GP referral if she can’t afford to pay.

Ratfinkstinkypink · 08/05/2024 18:18

You're right, it is not your responsibility to pay for her therapy, if DSIL wants her to have therapy then she needs to source it herself.

Mumofteenandtween · 08/05/2024 18:18

That is actually so ridiculous that it is actually funny!

Google “narcissistic”.

Oneofthesurvivors · 08/05/2024 18:17

I wouldn't even respond

Original poster
Auntieterrible · 08/05/2024 18:17

@Foggymcfogson true but he didn’t want to separate and blamed me too

OP posts:
Foggymcfogson · 08/05/2024 18:17

Forward the message to your ex... It's his dn..

tighterthancramp · 08/05/2024 18:17

Tell Sil to go forth and multiply 😂

Original poster
Auntieterrible · 08/05/2024 18:16

“Has a dd” not “had a dad”

OP posts:
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