No shorts at my wedding

I think that it’s a whole different ball game if people have travelled , if the bride and groom choose a hot country and for everyone to spend a fortune getting there for them then to impose restrictions which may make people really hot and uncomfortable. I actively encouraged shorts at my wedding, it was 28degrees, my husband changed straight after we’d cut the cake!

My guests enjoyment and comfort was more important to me than anything else. I’m not self obsessed or selfish. My focus was the people I loved celebrating our day, not insta worthy or pretentious or wanting to control everything!

IF the OP wanted a really formal wedding with suits etc she should have just done it at home!

Actually yes, shorts are much more commonly worn in hot counties, it’s fairly common office attire . My brother lives in the south of France and they think we’re mad that office attire is a shirt and tie. Chino style shorts. At his extremely hot wedding there were most certainly shorts .

Would a pictorial guide as an insert work.

Ok = pic 1 pink short suit
Not ok = pic 2 garish board shorts
Preferred = pic 3 black tie elegance

It would never occur to me to have to stipulate 'no shorts', or any dress code at all for a wedding.

Assuming your friends and relations are functioning adults, they will know what to wear to a wedding.

Congratulations 🥂
I am a wedding celebrant in Spain and have worked at some amazing venues.
I have NEVER seen anyone (men or women) wearing shorts.
What month are you getting married?
June/July/August and even September to request black tie is madness.
I would say nothing regarding dress at all rather than risk offending guests by dictating what they should wear.
They have gone to the trouble and significant expense to attend; be grateful for that and
have a wonderful day 💫 x

I lived in Spain for 20 years and attended a number of weddings, never saw a male guest in anything other than long trousers.

Shorts are far too casual for a wedding, for men or women

A dress code isn't so you only have to rest your gaze on the knees you want to look at. A dress code is there for the comfort of the guest, so that they have a guideline to follow and they can relax and know that they won't turn up looking like a dick on the day. You've got it the wrong way round.

If you're going to stipulate a dress code, which is fair enough, give a proper one, not a made up one, then you won't have to add any caveat regarding shorts. Sorted.

So if they turn up in shorts will you have them chucked out?

So only dresses below the knee?

Do you think Spanish men go to weddings wearing shorts??

I come from a hot country, and I got married at the hottest time of year. No one wore shorts. Do people actualyl wear shorts to a wedding?

But surely if the venue is formal and you want fairly formal wear, you just say somethign like, "Dress code: smart" or "Dress code: elegant" or dress code/l lounge suits or whatever and thens urely people know that means no shorts.

I mean, the only time I can imagine wearing shorts to a w edding woudl be if it was on a beach and the dress code was specified as "casual" or "beachware".

I got married in the UK on a baking hot August day, everyone wore trousers as it was a church/posh hotel type of wedding. The ladies' dresses were quite formal too and lots of hats. My best friend got married at a festival-type wedding, men were in shorts and the dresses were casual. Brits can dress for the occasion!

However, if I told my DH we were off to a destination wedding and the invitation was not clear as to how formal he may think of tailored shorts, a dress code message is needed, could it not be Summer formal, long trousers for men please.

As a note we actively avoid holiday destinations that expect long trousers for men and dresses for women but would make an exception for a wedding.

This is a very good point. I genuinely wouldn't know what to do with that instruction and would spend way too much of my life googling, stressing and discussing with friends how to interpret that as a dress code.

BTW you just put formal attire. If anyone's feeling brave enough for formal shorts then that's on them. It 99% won't happen.

Some people will ignore the formal request anyway

Oh, there's always some dickhead middleaged middle manager who thinks he's incredibly edgy and individual in turning up to formal events, including in churches, (especially those for his wife or kids, he'd never do it where it could affect his career or reputation) in a pair of board shorts.

In my experience, whilst they're dressing like the dodgy IT bloke from Jurassic Park for their wife's important business meeting, they go on to turn up in a very expensive and sober looking suit on a leaflet for their attempt to become the local Conservative Councillor at the next election.

I think smart tailored short look great on a guy! Nobody's going to turn up in trunks are they? I don't see the problem with a nice tshirt, shorts, and light blazer for example.

I’ve never seen anyone wearing shorts for a wedding ceremony in Europe, unless the wedding was literally on the beach.

Just say something like “Our venue’s dress code requires men to wear long trousers” if you’re bothered.

I don’t really know why you’d care, though.

So why is it ok to see women's "wobbly knees" and not mens? Its a bit odd anyway to worry about looking at other people's knees at your own wedding!

You’re being unreasonable.

its a wedding, people will know not to turn up in their adidas swimming shorts, they will be in smart chino shorts etc.

are you also going to dictate that ladies dresses are ankle length? Stop dictating and focus on what’s actually important for your wedding day.

Never mind the shorts conundrum, what the Jane McDonald is "summer elegance"?

I can’t imagine anyone I know over the age of 10 or so thinking it would be appropriate to wear shorts to a wedding, Spain or not.

Just put “formal” on the wedding invitation. Or don’t put anything at all. Most people are aware a wedding is a formal occasion anyway.

Surely you wouldn’t have so many guests with no idea of social conventions around weddings that it would be an issue?
One or two shamefaced chaps can hide their knees at the back, and thus not ruin the photos, surely?

It's my Silver Wedding Anniversary in 3 weeks time.

I have virtually zero recollection of what people wore. I do remember my friends and family giving up a sunny Saturday to come and celebrate my life choice.

With the British weather, I suspect no shorts at the ceremony will be a relief... Pffft now I've got to buy formal shorts for the wedding as my Hawaiin board shorts won't cut it.
Ooh long trousers, goodie, I'll chuck the usuals in the case 😂

I think with what you've written re women, just add men - long trousers.

Some places do specify long trousers for dining abroad.

I'm just struggling with elegance... That's me not going! 🤣

I’d be left wondering what “summer elegance” was - no visible tattoos? They’re not elegant.

but yes, usually formal restaurants in hot climes refer to “long trousers” for men rather than NO SHORTS. Also as per pp, if it’s in a church do you need to stipulate shoulders covered etc?