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AIBU?

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Original poster

No shorts at my wedding

829 replies

MumOfHals · 08/05/2024 11:54

I'm getting married in Spain, in a really formal venue. I want to ask the men NOT to wear shorts for the ceremony, AIBU lol?

How can I word on the invite NO SHORTS?

Dress code:

Summer elegance for the ladies and matching formal attire for the men. NO SHORTS ( just doesn't flow well LOL)

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ellyeth · 14/05/2024 11:54

It's your wedding and I suppose you can say whatever you want. Personally speaking, though, I wouldn't feel comfortable laying down specific rules like this, particularly as it is likely to be hot there. It seems a bit diva'ish. Surely, within reason, what people wear isn't really that important.

booktokbear · 13/05/2024 17:31

Why ask a question on AIBU and then get annoyed at people when they say YABU? This happens so often when people just want their view justified.

BrightonFrock · 13/05/2024 17:28

Well that’s as may be, but it shouldn’t have been beyond the realms of her imagination to realise some of the responses would be “Don’t say it at all”.

Lucyh179 · 13/05/2024 16:36

TheNoodlesIncident · 08/05/2024 12:13

I got married in a hot country.

I did not give a damn what anybody wore, I was only glad that people had made the effort to come at all! It's a very big ask for the additional expense and additional time taken (not everybody has lots of annual leave available or can just go when they like) and no, you're not giving them an opportunity for a holiday, as you're dictating where and when.

One of my guests wore jeans. Still don't care! I'd care about my own attire and that of my groom, but everyone else can please themselves. It's more important they're comfortable!

Well, aren’t you brilliant?! I don’t think she asked for opinions on the attire, she asked for opinions on how to phrase it.

Lucyh179 · 13/05/2024 16:33

Youcannotbeseriousreally · 08/05/2024 11:58

You want people to go to Spain for your wedding and then you want them to be hot and uncomfortable?

well don’t you sound delightful!

seriously, if you wanted formal why did you chose a hot country 🤣

Seriously, what kind of grown man wears shorts to a wedding?!

Lucyh179 · 13/05/2024 16:31

BringMeSunshineAllDayLong · 08/05/2024 11:56

What a weird request!

Rude and hardly. It’s a wedding which for most people is a formal occasion.

PcBassoon · 12/05/2024 20:36

I have no idea about Spain, but in the US you could put no shorts and not be rude. A lot of country clubs don't allow shorts so I would just assume it was the venue's rules. I would word it more politely like "Please no shorts."

Crunchymum · 12/05/2024 19:46

Is the OP trying to plug the venue? Looks gorgeous but cannot see what the pictures really have to do with anything?

Blondebrunette1 · 12/05/2024 19:39

What month is it and what time is your wedding? We looked around wedding venues abroad and a hotel wedding planner said to us, no not wear suit jackets or long trousers because they've had guests and grooms pass out .... If it's evening or early morning and not peak season heat then fair enough, agree to state long trousers please but I wouldn't put NO SHORTS.

Bellyblueboy · 12/05/2024 17:05

Heidi75 · 12/05/2024 13:25

No you wouldn't, but it's also not 35-40 degrees in England!

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Genuine question - do you believe everyone in hot countries wears shorts to weddings?

My parents went to a wedding in Canada a few years ago. It was probably close to 35 degrees. No one wore shorts - in fact the men all wore dark suits.

I am really puzzled by the amount of people who think shorts are common attire at weddings in hot countries. I have only ever seen it at very casual beach weddings.

Heidi75 · 12/05/2024 13:25

MumOfHals · 08/05/2024 11:56

Not really, I don't want to see nobbly knees. It's not a pub garden or a christening, it's a wedding- you wouldn't wear them in England wedding in a church?

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No you wouldn't, but it's also not 35-40 degrees in England!

Yawnfest79 · 11/05/2024 23:51

MumOfHals · 08/05/2024 21:36

Meal / Reception is in the evening, under the stars, fairy lights.

I'm not exposing my guests to 40 degree sweltering midday heat.

I never thought I had the need to address shorts for a 'location' wedding, 50% of our guests are Spaniards and won't wear shorts... but like the 20% of Brits at my friends Spanish wedding recently a lot wore shorts / trainers.

I get to them it's a holiday, but they can respect its a wedding from 6pm-3am.

Anything up to 6pm they can walk around in their birthday suit if they please. Their room is on the venue with aircon.

I personally don't see it as a hardship.

This looks beautiful. Can I come! Promise not to wear shorts or trainers! Ha

BengalGal · 11/05/2024 21:31

Sure you mean formal attire? Because that’s tuxedos for men and floor length dresses for women. Maybe say it’s a formal venue but semi formal attire is fine. I don’t think anyone would wear shorts unless they were a child in this case.

Bellyblueboy · 11/05/2024 21:29

Trying to understand this very odd thread. Do people think Spain is hotter than most countries? Yes it’s warmer than the Uk, but shorts are not standard attire for weddings in any warm country that I can think of.

why are people so insistent that shorts are the only thing at a reasonable adult could stay cool at a formal event? Do people honestly believe people in Australia, souther us states, Mexico, France, Portugal, Singapore etc etc all never wear long trousers?

is it because people from uk traditionally go to Spain on holidays so think beach wear is all that is worn?

BIossomtoes · 11/05/2024 21:25

Ifailed · 11/05/2024 21:20

She’s not being daft. Loose linen or cotton trousers are cooler than shorts.

Do you have any facts to back this up?

Life experience.

ClipClopperDontStopper · 11/05/2024 21:24

Light wafty trousers always feel more cooling to me in hot weather than shorts. They create a love little breeze as you walk.

Ifailed · 11/05/2024 21:20

She’s not being daft. Loose linen or cotton trousers are cooler than shorts.

Do you have any facts to back this up?

willWillSmithsmith · 11/05/2024 20:53

Youdontevengohere · 11/05/2024 20:31

Of course 😂. I am half Spanish and lived there for 20 years, I can tell you that Spaniards are not all stylish and classy!

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I’ve been to Spain many times and I concur. They’re no more attractive, stylish or classy than us Brits. Yes we have our yobbish and (eek chavy) element but I’m assuming they’ve not been invited.

BrendaSmall · 11/05/2024 20:51

ISeriouslyDoubtIt · 11/05/2024 11:29

Only a certain type of people would. No one I know would think it acceptable because they know how to dress appropriately for the occasion.

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🤣🤣
people nowadays wears smart shorts,
its only a church it’s no where special, also not many people are religious nowadays!!

NK572a3d19X11e7ef5ddf9 · 11/05/2024 20:49

I mean, I'd never specify a dress code. Let people wear whatever they want. It's your wedding, no one cares what the guests are wearing. Tbh, most of the men wore shorts at mine (in France, it was 35 degrees) except for my Scottish friend who insisted on wearing a full kilt outfit and was absolutely boiling. But all the French side were very taken with him so worth it 😂

Youdontevengohere · 11/05/2024 20:31

willWillSmithsmith · 11/05/2024 20:22

Only the British friends and family, the Spanish ones are all stylish and classy.

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Of course 😂. I am half Spanish and lived there for 20 years, I can tell you that Spaniards are not all stylish and classy!

willWillSmithsmith · 11/05/2024 20:22

Youdontevengohere · 11/05/2024 15:44

She definitely thinks they’re all ‘chavs’ who don’t know how to dress.

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Only the British friends and family, the Spanish ones are all stylish and classy.

BIossomtoes · 11/05/2024 19:45

WeAreAllMadeOfStarz · 11/05/2024 19:34

Don't be daft @RampantIvy or loads of people on holiday would be going to the beach in trousers 🙄 That's like saying long sleeves don't make you any warmer than short sleeves.

She’s not being daft. Loose linen or cotton trousers are cooler than shorts.

WeAreAllMadeOfStarz · 11/05/2024 19:34

Don't be daft @RampantIvy or loads of people on holiday would be going to the beach in trousers 🙄 That's like saying long sleeves don't make you any warmer than short sleeves.

Sunshineheavan · 11/05/2024 19:34

I got married abroad and all the men wore tailored shorts and looked lovely next to the floaty attire of the women. And because the shorts were tailored you could hardly see the knees unless sitting down. Relax, have fun and enjoy your day. Unless the venue stipulates long trousers I wouldn’t be concerned at all. The most important thing is that you have a lovely day, not worry about what others are wearing. You want everyone to enjoy your special day with you, not melt in the heat.