To complain about colleague that dominates meetings talking crap?

I was in a meeting where someone was waffling self-indulgently and someone interrupted and said, “Thank you. You’ve made your point.” That was enough to kill their monologue dead. I can’t understand how this person is thick skinned enough to not realise how insufferable they are or why they are being allowed to go on and on and on wasting everyone’s time and nobody is backing you! Yes, complain. Do it on the grounds that your time is not being spent productively as meetings are not being used effectively.

This.

I would look at it this way, they are paying you to sit and listen to his droning on, so its their problem, not yours. Unless it's making you late finishing, just leave it. I couldn't stand working for such a badly managed place, so you have my sympathy.

God how annoying. If your managers aren't addressing it I don't think a formal grievance will help.

I would raise it in writing with them though, calmly pointing out how much work time it's wasting and asking them to address it.

If they don't do act I'd just start visibly doing work while he's talking. Whip out a laptop and start typing. If anyone raises an eyebrow I'd say "oh, I thought this wasn't part of the meeting, given the topic?".

The "work" I would be doing while he talks would probably include applying for other roles!

The issue is the manager who is failing to effectively chair the meeting.

That's who you complain about.

DH’s company have a timer. They were all sick of droners.

They get 10 minutes before an alarm goes off. It changed everything drastically.

Self entitled men who drone on do my head in. As l said we used to play Buzzword Bingo to
padd the time on.

It’s the meeting chair who’s the issue.

How many other people are in these meetings? Is it just you, 4 managers & gobshite or are there 20 other people involved as well.

How do others feel & what do they do?

Daily stand ups are supposed to be short & snappy but it sounds like your management don’t really know what they are doing.

I don’t think a grievance is the way to go as you need to have something specific that impacts you to complain about and general poor management plus someone being a gobshite in meetings wouldn’t meet that threshold. Like others I suggest you just do other work if the meetings are virtual and if you feel bold enough you can take your laptop into the f2f meetings and just do your work. If there are other colleagues who feel the same as you I’d encourage them to do similar.

Suggest minute taking and chairing are skills everyone should develop at your next appraisal. If needed there are courses to develop these skills.

Helped us identify who the most efficient chairs were! Win for everyone.

(

I feel like the management are intimidated and in awe of him

I wouldn’t bother putting a grievance in. Finding someone annoying isn’t reason enough. Taking shortcuts in his work should be dealt with by his manager at performance reviews if there is any impact on his productivity/standards/efficiency. It’s not really a grievance unless it’s an issue of gross misconduct.

But if management feel the way you say, you’ll be the one left out in the cold. The reality is that HR will often side with whoever is deemed more important to the business. You get 30 seconds to speak and he gets 30 minutes. Don’t do it. Do go back to your manager and say again about how he’s wasting company time wanging on about himself. It’s irritating as fuck.

Apart from being annoying, does his behaviour stop you doing your work to a good standard? Do you feel as though he is bullying you or treating you personally with disrespect? If not to any of it, I wouldn’t raise a grievance

Depends on your aptitude for suffering fools. I cannot personally suffer fools for very long so I would probably lose it a little and say ‘what are you talking about? You are talking utter nonsense. These meetings should last 10 minutes not an hour and we need to tighten this up because it’s a waste of everyone’s time. manager - how are we going to improve the efficiency of these meetings because these end up being a monologue and aren’t productive.’

I was the boss though in my old career so that is different and I don’t have to get involved in office politics much. But that was also a good reason why I was the boss - I couldn’t suffer fools and if I had to, they wouldn’t last long.

Just refuse to go to the meeting.

So if you interrupt him he says "hang on let me finish"? Then why, when he interrupts you, do you not say the exact same thng? Or if he interrupts your manager answering you "sorry Tony I was asking Jeff please let him finish giving me an answer"

What an appalling waste of time. Every day?

I agree but this does depend somewhat on how senior you are.

If very junior you might not be able to say this to someone more senior.

Also consider whether your managers are keeping this individual happy for another reason? Eg he has specialist skills that cannot easily be replaced.

Buzzword Bingo is fun in these situations. At least until it’s sorted.

Is there some form of chat function to the online session?

If so maybe just pop a message along the lines of "it seems we have finished the actual meeting now and are having a general chitchat. As such I am going to leave the session as rather busy here but let me know if anything of further relevance to the agenda is going to be discussed further and I will rejoin".

We all have one of these. I quickly shut it down with, thanks for the update but we are not going to have time to solve it in this meeting. Let’s schedule a separate call , send me an invite. Now moving onto ….

If there are four managers witnessing this daily, then you saying you don't like it isn't going to make them suddenly take action.

Either keep your head down and look for another job while he's wittering on, or state before the meeting that you have to leave at x time so can the points that involve you be addressed before you leave.

He won't change, the culture is supporting his nonsense and that's a bigger issue than you.

Sit back and have some shut eye.

Even better if you all agree to do it beforehand.

FFS. I have the power through my keyboard to force people to do stuff.

I'm wasted working where i am.

Get a grip.

Yes, I would formally complain. It's not an unchangeable part of his personality at all, that's ridiculous. He lacks self awareness, professionalism and clearly overvalues his own opinion. It's rude and I would keep complaining.

I would also keep using the phrases "Sorry Ben, I feel we're diverting away from the purpose of the call". "Sorry Ben, can we park that and come back to it in our own time?". "Sorry guys, I have work to do to meet a deadline and the meeting has overrun by XXX minutes so I'll need to log off now". "Would it be possible if we could share the meeting for equitably? I don't feel I'm getting a fair chance to contribute". "Sorry Ben, that question was for Manager on this occasion".

You actively tried to set her on a course of action ending with "at some point a male manger will tell you that your behaviour is unacceptable."

That's borderline sabotage.

they are putting up with it because it really only affects OP. She is the only one bothered by it. If a man were bothered by it he would do something about it.

OP can listen to what i say or not, she doesn't have to put herself in the firing line which is why i have suggested a) more than one action and b) a book that might help.

Agree this "type" is very very common.

Can you zone out of the meetings and just read whilst he's droning on? What's your next goal/career move? Are you stuck in this situation at this level permanently?

This is a low value person who will always drain time and energy and attention given the opportunity. You want to steer as clear as possible.

I'd be wary to not get absorbed and caught up in "winning" against him, to the detriment of your next move.

You don't want to be caught up in dealing with his weird shit whilst others are looking for the next promotion or opportunity.

Like @Rebusmyfire says reading something quietly could work, or even skipping/shortening the meetings or turning video off where possible.