Touching himself on public transport

Anyone who saw this could be a direct victim. Those that didn’t see it could also report it if they became aware of it later on - eg, the bus driver. I see your description of the man’s behaviour has also changed!

I assume fiddling with their shaft n balls gives them a sense of power

What’s confusing? You don’t need to be the direct victim to report a crime!

All of it is disgusting. They do know what they’re doing and if they don’t know it’s wrong then they need to be told it is not socially acceptable.

I mean it’s not as if I shove my hand around my boobs and minge and play with it is it?! (I don’t by the way!).

Why do some men get a free pass on this behaviour?

Urgh not to mention his ball hands on the rails... Grim.

Fair enough, but I think that there is a real risk here of excusing this type of behaviour under that particular bracket.

@WinterMorn there wasn't anything to suggest it wasn't. She asked what I would do and that is what I would do. I certainly wouldn't confront him or tell him off and put myself at risk but I absolutely know of older men who have done this with additional needs for sensory soothing reasons and not sexual ones at all - ofcourse it s not ok in a public place but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen and in the case of me being on the bus there are limited things could do.

Are you the victim though? It sounds like he had his headphones on and wasn’t paying you any attention, but was doing that,without thought or even intent from what you say.

yes it’s grim and no one wants to see that. But I’m not sure declaring yourself a victim is totally rational.

And those teenagers standing around with their hands down their trackies, grim af

Really? There is not one thing in the OP’s comments that suggests this was the case. That’s a dangerous stereotype.

I would have absolutely have moved away and would make the assumption based on how he was dressed and behaving overall if it was more self-soothing which can be common with some additional needs that require high levels of sensory input (looking generally anxious, poorly/oddly dressed, poorer personal hygiene and general unkemptness) although still not appropriate or actually getting off on it in which case I would inform the driver and hope that my stereotyping was correct.

And your last sentence is untrue, and far too generalised, at least where I live and work. Any VAWG, voyeuristic or hint of inappropriate behaviour and the Police are all over it. This might well be the final piece of a jigsaw in prosecuting, breaching or recalling this male for all we know.

Without wishing to state the obvious, the OP has posted and specifically asked if she was BU not to say anything - and people are replying with their opinions and views. It’s as simple as that!

And also blame- for the man's future victims. 'You could've done something about it' rhetoric. Also it's naïve thinking as most of the time the police really don't bother themselves over things like this.

@WinterMorn the whole 'I could never live with myself' argument in relation to male violence in general, not specifically in the OP's situation (but still relevant), is actually quite manipulative as it does indeed put responsibility, pressure and shame on the victim.

Nobody is blaming the victim for anything, and it’s obvious whose fault it is.

Oh I hate that @Mama2many73. Sorry but it's awful enough to deal with the aftermath of a pervy encounter without other women heaping blame and responsibility on a victim. It's the man's fault. No one else's.

I'm not sure why /what you are expecting from responses.
I, Like uou, would have probably been too intimidated to say something to the man himself. You never know the reaction or the repercussions that could occur ie be followed of the bus.
However you are obviously questioning yourself. Personally I would have had to report it to someone , probably to the driver as I got off, or local police just to voice concern.
My personal concern is what happens to the next woman/child he meets. I'd never forgive myself if something happened and I knew and did nothing.
I once reported a man over intimidating behaviour and I KNOW I was being followed and was so afraid I called in an care home rather than walking the 50metres home. I called the police on 101 and reported it but because nothing happened/not threatened there was nothing they could do but take the report. I was happy with that. If anything had happened to someone else police had a greater awareness of the situation.

And I have not disputed that!

Yes but the OP can't help how she responded during the incident.

The thing is even if they don't think this particular incident constitutes a deliberate inappropriate act, it may help draw a bigger picture if it transpires a lot of other women at different times all noticed the same thing. For that reason I'd report it as it may be useful intelligence.

It’s not victim blaming at all, it’s fact! If this isn’t addressed, it WILL continue.