Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think most women on here hate men

739 replies

Tanyahawkes · 07/05/2024 18:45

Sorry for the rant but I’m noticing a pattern on mn, any post involving a man and a disagreement results in multiple calls of he’s a narcissist, he’s abusing, he’s controlling, leave the bastard!

I’ll admit that a list of posts do involve behaviour that is not nice from dh and dp. So many posts also can be interpreted in many ways too, I just feel like a large number of women jump to the worst conclusion first about a strangers partner, having only one side of a story told in a short version.

for anyone misunderstanding me, if a post says the partner is hurting physically, calling names, cheating, putting the op down, then yes I agree, ltb (so long as the post is true) it’s when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye” and everyone calls the poor guy a narcissist etc

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
grinandslothit · 10/05/2024 06:58

NOT ALL WOMEN

TheaBrandt · 10/05/2024 06:40

If a dispassionate alien came down and observed society and how men as a class dominate and abuse women as a class and have done for a millennia they would be incredulous that women have anything to do with men at all - let alone whine that women dare to ”hate” them.

Just look at the stats! The porn /the punter review sites / incel culture /the rape in war / 2 women a week killed /the fact that society is set by and run for men. They only let us participate because we fought back via the suffragettes and that was grudging. The hate is pretty much one way dear and it ain’t coming from Us!

5128gap · 10/05/2024 06:19

AbFabDaaaaahling · 09/05/2024 23:23

@taleasoldashoney You're being ridiculous now! The lady is angry, she hates all men, she clearly feels very hard done by. Even successful people need support sometimes. And that's OK.

The poster is angry about how she and other women have been treated by men, and rightly so. Justifiable anger is not 'unhealthy' its a motivating force to fight back on behalf of yourself and others. I'm sure there are those who would find it preferable to pathologise that anger and have it 'counselled away' so women like @PamPamPamPam hush up and the behaviour of men remains concealed, but that's not up to you to choose.

Catsmere · 10/05/2024 03:21

Spywoman · 10/05/2024 00:25

You're right. That poster is clearly not posting in good faith, so best not to engage.

The goading of an articulate and passionate poster with faux concern for their mental health gave it away.

I agree with you, the instruction to 'be kind' is so damaging and insidious. It seems so reasonable when you're growing up, I mean why shouldn't you be caring to others. Except when you see it's a trap designed to keep you from looking out for yourself and other women; it's only women and girls that are told this.

And once the scales fall, then you're told you're angry or mentally unstable. Which is another trap.

It's all about being made to be smaller.

And all those cool women that pass on the 'be kind' message, you're not making things better for lovely men. You're enabling the tossers, abusers and wankers.

I'm perfectly able to like, love and admire decent men. That doesn't stop me seeing that society is rigged in men's favour and there are many men that do want to debase and abuse women. Just go on a review site of female sex workers to see how some men really consider women. My experience of abusive men has enabled me to see red flags where they exist and I will continue to pass on that information because I wish someone had done that for me.

Believe it or not, I and many women on here can hold several viewpoints simultaneously without their head exploding.

Show quote history

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

Perfect post, thank you!

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:23

Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 02:14

So you are just trying to goad me back in, goodnight

Show quote history

So great that we all now agree that most women here don't hate men.

Good outcome :)

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:22

It's fantastic that we all now agree that most women on here don't hate men :) great outcome :)

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 02:14

@strangewomenlyinginponds You need a new phone I think.

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 02:14

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:12

So, as we all now agree, most women on here don't hate men.

Excellent :)

Show quote history

So you are just trying to goad me back in, goodnight

OP posts:
strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:12

Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 02:09

Ahh yes my sleeping and having finished arguing many hours ago was very wittering, I think you meant someone else maybe, unless you were trying to goad me back into an argument, my last post that I would think maybe considered arguing was around maybe 7pm or thereabouts. I think you maybe made a mistake and seem unwilling to admit it, so unless you can quote which post you were referring to of mine, I’ll say good nite to everyone

Show quote history

So, as we all now agree, most women on here don't hate men.

Excellent :)

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 02:09

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:05

Your never ending posting and wittering is a clue. Like now.

So, as you know most women here don't hate men. Asked and answered.

Show quote history

Ahh yes my sleeping and having finished arguing many hours ago was very wittering, I think you meant someone else maybe, unless you were trying to goad me back into an argument, my last post that I would think maybe considered arguing was around maybe 7pm or thereabouts. I think you maybe made a mistake and seem unwilling to admit it, so unless you can quote which post you were referring to of mine, I’ll say good nite to everyone

OP posts:
strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:06

So, as we all now agree, most women on here don't hate men.

Excellent :)

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 02:05

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 02:00

@Tanyahawkes Quite possibly.
Hope the weird noise has stopped now?
I can't sleep at all because hubby is snoring so loudly it's almost causing the windows to rattle!! Think I'm going to LTB... 😜

Funnily enough the noise seems to have stopped, it was like the creaking of a swing chain rubbing over and over, I’ve been awake about 15 min and it’s only just stopped a couple of min ago, I was dreaming that there was the same noise and as I approached a kids park I had realised the noise was a swing creaking, so very odd, then I find all this goings on 🤣

back to sleep for me, I hope your hubby stops snoring soon so you can sleep, mine denys snoring (he doesn’t snore much) I however snore like a rhino when I’ve got a cold, poor guy doesn’t get much sleep when that happens

OP posts:
strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 02:05

Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 01:52

Why did you ask if I was still wittering on though, I had not been arguing for hours and was in fact asleep while some other people were arguing

Show quote history

Your never ending posting and wittering is a clue. Like now.

So, as you know most women here don't hate men. Asked and answered.

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 02:00

@Tanyahawkes Quite possibly.
Hope the weird noise has stopped now?
I can't sleep at all because hubby is snoring so loudly it's almost causing the windows to rattle!! Think I'm going to LTB... 😜

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 01:54

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:52

@Tanyahawkes I think she may have sat on her phone; it appears to be doing some sort of weird copying and pasting.

I’m all honesty I just wondering if the lady actually meant the people arguing their points about something, (I’m not even fully awake here, just woke to a weird noise outside that was invading my dream for who knows how long) and I am thinking I got the blame by accident

OP posts:
AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:52

@Tanyahawkes I think she may have sat on her phone; it appears to be doing some sort of weird copying and pasting.

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 01:52

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 01:51

As you know most women on here don't hate men.

Asked and answered.

Show quote history

Why did you ask if I was still wittering on though, I had not been arguing for hours and was in fact asleep while some other people were arguing

OP posts:
strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 01:51

Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 01:49

What an I supposed to have done now? I’ve been asleep!

Show quote history

As you know most women on here don't hate men.

Asked and answered.

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 01:50

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:42

@strangewomenlyinginponds What comment didn't you make?
You said whether you are married to a man is irrelevant. I disagree.

Edited

Nah. You're responding to a comment I didn't make, don't do that, derailing and responding to comments not made is a boring and obvious form of trolling.

As you know most women here don't hate men. Asked and answered. End.

Original poster
Tanyahawkes · 10/05/2024 01:49

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 00:56

Oh my God is the OP STILL wittering on?! You asked. We answered. The vast majority believe you're wrong. For the love of God, find a new way to try to blame women for existing.

Edited

What an I supposed to have done now? I’ve been asleep!

OP posts:
AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:42

@strangewomenlyinginponds What comment didn't you make?
You said whether you are married to a man is irrelevant. I disagree.

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 01:38

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:26

@strangewomenlyinginponds There absolutely are women on here that hate all men. They don't even deny it!! Disgraceful. Not a case of they hate some men (and justifiably so). They literally hate all men.
It is absolutely relevant as I'm assuming a man-hating woman wouldn't be married to one?!

Nah. You're responding to a comment I didn't make, don't do that, derailing and responding to comments not made is a boring and obvious form of trolling.

As you know most women here don't hate men. Asked and answered. End.

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:26

@strangewomenlyinginponds There absolutely are women on here that hate all men. They don't even deny it!! Disgraceful. Not a case of they hate some men (and justifiably so). They literally hate all men.
It is absolutely relevant as I'm assuming a man-hating woman wouldn't be married to one?!

strangewomenlyinginponds · 10/05/2024 01:21

Spywoman · 10/05/2024 00:25

You're right. That poster is clearly not posting in good faith, so best not to engage.

The goading of an articulate and passionate poster with faux concern for their mental health gave it away.

I agree with you, the instruction to 'be kind' is so damaging and insidious. It seems so reasonable when you're growing up, I mean why shouldn't you be caring to others. Except when you see it's a trap designed to keep you from looking out for yourself and other women; it's only women and girls that are told this.

And once the scales fall, then you're told you're angry or mentally unstable. Which is another trap.

It's all about being made to be smaller.

And all those cool women that pass on the 'be kind' message, you're not making things better for lovely men. You're enabling the tossers, abusers and wankers.

I'm perfectly able to like, love and admire decent men. That doesn't stop me seeing that society is rigged in men's favour and there are many men that do want to debase and abuse women. Just go on a review site of female sex workers to see how some men really consider women. My experience of abusive men has enabled me to see red flags where they exist and I will continue to pass on that information because I wish someone had done that for me.

Believe it or not, I and many women on here can hold several viewpoints simultaneously without their head exploding.

Show quote history

This is a great comment.

I'm married to a good man and have a kind, caring adult son. But since that's just irrelevant to the question asked I didn't try to make it the focus of a derailing comment.

The OP has received an overwhelming no to her question., and it's a fair no.

Being able to see reality and point out abusive behaviour does not equate to hating men.

The question is not Why do do many women point out male abuses, the question is Why are so many men abusive and how do we deal with it?

Knowledge is powerful, wise women sharing hard won wisdom is powerful and that's why misogynists and handmaidens find it unacceptable.

AbFabDaaaaahling · 10/05/2024 01:06

@Oneofthesurvivors Thank you for your wonderfully respectful reply. I thought as much. Vile.