Expect 2 year old to sit quietly in restaurants

This is really sad, they've missed out on doing fun things with their son/grandson by being like this. From this age onwards we had basically realised holidays needed to be based on finding things the kids liked, because when they're happy, we are happy! We would do things like go to farm parks, play parks, petting zoos, national trust properties, nature trails and then find nice delis to cook ourselves delicious food once they are in bed, or get a babysitter if we wanted to eat out.
Obviously not the whole holiday but he's 1/4 of the people on the trip, so it's only fair some of it focuses on what he likes and everything you do fits his basic needs (aka not to sit still for 2 straight hours)!

Of course he needs to get up and explore, do you have to go to every meal with them? But as long as they don't have an issue with you taking him for a run around while waiting for the food etc then it doesn't seem like it needs to be a huge deal. If they do have an issue with that then they are being silly.

Definitely not 3 times a day. We take our 2 year old out for lunch at a “proper” restaurant at least once a week and he is mostly good with that. If we’re having a full 3 courses, he often needs to be taken outside before dessert arrives to blow off some energy. We never do evening meals as he will be too grouchy at that point of the day. Obviously on holiday we also have breakfast in the hotel restaurant and he’s generally fine with this.

Tbh, I’d have gone off and done my own thing with LO rather than traipse around with the in laws. There’s so many fantastic things for little ones up in the lakes.

It's perfectly acceptable to get a two year old to sit well in a restaurant...
Once in a blue moon at a family occasion.
What they're asking is perfectly unacceptable, poor kid, he wants to be out exploring then a pit stop to refuel. YANBU in the slightest.

I fully expect my kids (1-8yo) to sit through a proper dinner at a restaurant and behave. And they do.

But this just sounds tedious! Who has time for this amount of restaurants? I wouldn't, and I wouldn't expect any child to either.

It's not a holiday if it carers to only some of you.

They wanna do that they can deal with the kiddo this isn’t all on you!

One meal a day in a restaurant is fine for a child and breakfast if you’re at a hotel but longer than that no Tell your dh that he has to limit his gourmet standards to once a day. Kids need to explore where they are and not see restaurants and shops all day every day.

My pil used to be like this. They'd plan a family event focussed around a long lunch, 2-3 hours adults sat round a table talking, zero means of occupying our toddlers.

This is the sort of behaviour of people who probably don't in fact want to accomodate a child at all.

That sounds like such a boring holiday for a child. I hope your DH didn't expect you to pick up the slack while him and his DM enjoyed hours of food each day. I love eating out but that would even bore me to tears.

My 2yr old and 3yr old (both autistic) will sit while we order and eat but that's it and certainly not being there and back and there and back. There is a limit and they certainly need stimulation through the rest of the day not there, then shops and there again. They're kids and need to do things that are fun for them too. I would of been no sorry we are off to the farm today or going to see a waterfall. We usually take a dinner picnic and eat tea out doing things like this. It'd be boring for me lol nevermind a 2yr old and would pretend to be so ill so I didn't have to go 😂. Poor kiddy doesn't have that choice and knowledge yet. I would maybe do their thing one day and rest would be our things.

I have a 3 year old and it’s totally normal, doesn’t sound like a very nice holiday for you or your kid but you seem like you handled it well. It’s unfair of them to expect your toddler to be happy with that.

my DS absolutely loved both butlins and center parcs. Have a fab time!

I deliberately don’t take my son (2.5) out to eat very often to a restaurant as he will sit to eat but he will sit still 20 mins tops. He just wants to be outside exploring too. I’d be b very mad if this was my holiday plans and I just wouldn’t do it with my ds

Yanbu at all. Xx

Mine wouldn't cope with sitting still that long at that age. They would have been bored senseless. I'd be bored senseless waiting an hour for someone to finish lunch! Can you pack a picnic and a blanket next time?

YANBU this is totally mean. 2 year olds are a joy (challenging but a joy) and this holiday sounds like a punishment for one.

I have a 2.5 year old and when we were on holiday last year in France we ended up hardly eating out at all as it just wasn't worth it with the toddler. I do think it's good to get them accustomed to family dinners out but we do that when in the UK and I just couldn't face the staring from the locals (muttering in French or just giving us looks!)
The idea of 3 meals out per day with a toddler!! Ridiculous and I'd also get bored!

Good to see most people on the same page here.. although I did have a good laugh at reply banging on about being overweight, I think it's perfectly possible to eat 3 meals a day and not have a weight problem!

On occasion, my 2.5 year old can just about make it through a dinner in a restaurant. If she's allowed to draw, or play a bit, or her older cousins are there to help entertain at the table.

Three times in one day wouldn't happen. She's full of beans and likes to be busy. She's not hard to entertain, a walk in the lake district would be perfect because there's stuff to see, collect, investigate. But I'm a restaurant she is hard to entertain because she doesn't want to sit and not disturb other people. She also doesn't care about "fine dining" or being a foodie. She likes food, she eats well, but she'd be over the moon with nuggets or sausages for every meal.

We went away with our friends and 1 year old a while back and they were the same, in the end we basically ended up having separate plans during the day and meeting up at night. They’ve asked to go away again and we’ve just avoided it - daughter is 4 now and we have another so our holidays are all about the kids.

Everyone is different, I don’t know if some kids are naturally calmer or if they’re used to just having to sit there but ours won’t. Daughter will now she’s a bit older but not at 2 she wouldn’t

3 meals a day in restuarants is she madd-i only do that on all inclusives

your p sousd useless- whats with all "I took ds out" why didnt dp?

I love eating out but it's not practical to sit for hours in a restaurant with a toddler. Your DP and MIL are being selfish. I'd make sure you're the one to plan the next holiday and factor in activities for your little one (petting zoo/farms/adventure play parks/swimming pool) and family friendly places to eat (indoor/outdoor play area, pub garden) and if MIL complains, tell her you'll be having child friendly holidays from now on so if she's not keen on that, perhaps she should holiday separately?

They could have stayed at home to walk around shops & eat out 3 times a day.

What a complete waste of a break in the Lake District!

Poor child (& poor you).

Just what inflexible reality are you all living in?

Everyone needs an element of flexibility. And holidays need to cater for everyone's needs.

Your husband and mother sound incredibly overweight if they happily eat out 3 times a day.

However their needs seem to be to eat perpetually.

You son needs stimulation and entertainment. Preferably away from the food table, or he's going to turn into a real porker.

So do your research. There should be an activity every single day on holiday that engages your child - swimming pool, beach, local attraction, boat trip, animal farm, historical site, making friends with other children.

Make sure you go online and research and put together an activity plan for your holiday.

Get MIL and husband to take charge for one activity day involving your son - because you need downtime too. Or all enjoy it as a family.

But just remember you are setting your son's expectations for life. You are engaging him and stimulating his curiousity.

Maybe you should ask husband and MIL what their family childhood holiday were like.

I may be wrong, but it sounds like husband and family are not "foodies", they're just basic gluttons.

Lake District - known for its beautiful countryside - how much of it did your family see? Or did they only see what was on the plates in front of them?