Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Crying and shaking

162 replies

somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:18

Do people really cry and shake simultaneously?
I can't recall a time ever in my life (and there have been some rather hairy moments, including being SA) that I have ever been crying and shaking. I cry when I'm upset and I shake when I'm f*cking cold or have low blood sugar. Never have I cried and shook at the same time.

To all those people who are 'crying and shaking', are you actually crying and shaking?

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 06/05/2024 19:45

I have snorted tea up my nose.

It actually really hurt.

Yes I have had the crying and shaking thing. Also seen it in others. As pp have said it is a trauma response.

Be glad that it hasn't happened to you.

SpeedwellBlue · 06/05/2024 19:40

somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:31

As mentioned in a pp, I've been in situations where I've been both afraid for my life and again for someone I know.

I've had rushes of adrenaline but I can't pinpoint a time when I've been both 'crying and shaking' at the same time.

Show quote history

Well maybe you are superior to the relatives pippa has seen while working in critical care?

Serencwtch · 06/05/2024 19:39

My DH is ex-police & has had to deliver bad news to loved ones including a mum who lost her baby in cot death & yes people can react like that. Just be grateful you've never experienced or witnessed it.

Original poster
somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:39

MonsteraMama · 06/05/2024 19:31

Once, after watching what I thought was my daughter dying in a car crash. She didn't die, but it looked so much like something completely unsurvivable I think my brain just went into complete meltdown. The crying and shaking didn't happen until after all the chaos died down and daughter was safe in hospital and stable, then I just broke down. It's the only time in my life I can recall really shaking like a leaf and crying truly hysterically, and I am a fairly openly emotional person!

I certainly wouldn't be doing so after being shouted at by someone in Tesco car park or something like you see on here.

That sounds awful OP, I hope all ended ok.
I can imagine that kind of situation where you're not in control and can't even imagine the outcome, you're at the mercy's of your emotions, whatever they may be.

OP posts:
MaMisled · 06/05/2024 19:39

If you havent experienced crying so much that you're shaking, you're very fortunate and really shouldn't mock those that have.

Womblealongwithme · 06/05/2024 19:39

I did when my mum died in front of me, yes.

LakieLady · 06/05/2024 19:37

somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:24

I almost forgot the snorting tea thing! Does anyone really snort/spray tea/coffee all over their keyboard?

Show quote history

I did it once, when someone said something very funny when I had a mouthful of tea. I sprayed my tea all over the keyboard, and must have snorted as well, because tea came down my nose too.

And it was at work, and I had to pretend it was a coughing fit. The colleague who'd made me laugh managed to remain impassive throughout, but another colleague swiftly took herself off to the bog for a good 10 minutes to recover.

ilovesooty · 06/05/2024 19:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Is that really necessary?

CaptainCarrot · 06/05/2024 19:36

People on MN cry and shake at the drop of a hat. If someone looks at them the wrong way, if someone unexpectedly knocks on their door, if a stranger smiles at their baby. Quite possibly if they literally drop a hat.

Sosickfromholidywahh · 06/05/2024 19:36

Yes, there is one person in my life that makes me shake and cry, a really awful person. Otherwise no

catlady7 · 06/05/2024 19:34

tracktrail · 06/05/2024 19:27

Once, when I was so angry, I couldn't control my emotions.

Can relate to this. Only when I'm angry. I always cry too.

CatamaranViper · 06/05/2024 19:33

I shake with an adrenaline rush, or after the rush I suppose. It's awful cos it's completely involuntary. I also blush which is annoying as I feel like it undermines me.

Crying and shaking though? Nah.

Babadook76 · 06/05/2024 19:32

It’s not hard to work out these things are used as phrases most of the time, but can actually happen to people, which is why they say it? I snort tea on a regular basis, usually when I’m in bed with a cup of tea and I read or see spending funny, and I try to hold in a laugh to not wake dh. I can’t seem to cry (I remember doing so twice in my adult life) so I don’t cry and shake. I have started shaking when I’ve experienced shock over something. It’s not hard to imagine someone shaking like I do and crying at the same time over something traumatic.

Vinesandivy · 06/05/2024 19:32

I’d say as an every day reaction no, but it’s happened to me after moments of significant trauma (DV).After an event I found myself involuntary shaking and crying. But it wouldn’t be an everyday reaction to minor things for me anyway!

Original poster
somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:31

Pippa12 · 06/05/2024 19:28

I work on critical care, I’ve experienced relatives physically shaking and crying, it’s a stress response.

I suppose it’s a good thing you haven’t experienced it.

As mentioned in a pp, I've been in situations where I've been both afraid for my life and again for someone I know.

I've had rushes of adrenaline but I can't pinpoint a time when I've been both 'crying and shaking' at the same time.

OP posts:
MonsteraMama · 06/05/2024 19:31

Once, after watching what I thought was my daughter dying in a car crash. She didn't die, but it looked so much like something completely unsurvivable I think my brain just went into complete meltdown. The crying and shaking didn't happen until after all the chaos died down and daughter was safe in hospital and stable, then I just broke down. It's the only time in my life I can recall really shaking like a leaf and crying truly hysterically, and I am a fairly openly emotional person!

I certainly wouldn't be doing so after being shouted at by someone in Tesco car park or something like you see on here.

OverpricedTea · 06/05/2024 19:30

I can imagine shaking after an assault or hideous news. As someone said, that horrible adrenaline surge can make you have uncontrollable muscle activity.

SecondHandFurniture · 06/05/2024 19:29

Shaking and crying are both ways of releasing pent-up energy/"shaking off" trauma as animals do, but I don't think someone being rude to a Mumsnetter in a supermarket qualifies as "trauma"...

MolkosTeenageAngst · 06/05/2024 19:28

I have but usually when there has been an element of fear or trauma behind the crying, so for example during and after being sexually assaulted I was crying and shaking simultaneously. I have poor mental health and there have been times I have been highly distressed and self harmed quite seriously and then come around and been crying and shaking simultaneously.

somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:28

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

littlekittyhoward · 06/05/2024 19:28

I do! I get quite chaotic adrenaline levels and so if I’m very emotional one way or the other I shake and my teeth start chattering. It’s very strange! It’s a hormone reaction for me, and also why I can’t have adrenaline at the dentist interestingly enough!

Pippa12 · 06/05/2024 19:28

I work on critical care, I’ve experienced relatives physically shaking and crying, it’s a stress response.

I suppose it’s a good thing you haven’t experienced it.

tracktrail · 06/05/2024 19:27

Once, when I was so angry, I couldn't control my emotions.

Original poster
somethingisnotquiteright · 06/05/2024 19:27

oldgreysquirreltest · 06/05/2024 19:24

Only when I didn't know if DD was going to survive an illness.

I hope your DD is ok.

I have been in a similar situation (acutely in fear for someone's life) but I can't recall physically shaking. Crying and being very upset, yes. But to a point of physically shaking? No.

OP posts:
ReallyUAreAnElegantChap · 06/05/2024 19:27

Shaking is likely from adrenaline pumping through the body, completely normal in certain circumstances - and different in everybody