I hate sharing food!

I'm with you, OP. I prefer my own portions. It's particularly annoying in a larger group where the thing you want ends up at the other end of the table and you have to make a thing of asking for it to be passed.

But it doesn't have to be even.

Everyone takes a spoon of the dishes they want, taking care not to take too much so everyone who wants some gets some.

People eat their food and chat.

When plates are (nearly) clear, anyone who wants some more has seconds, again giving others chance if they want some too. Second time around, some people will be full, others will want a bit more of dish A, others dish B etc.

For anything where there's not much left, before taking the last of it, just say, anyone else want any more of this? If not, it's fair game, if yes, share what's left or order some more.

End result is that everyone has had the amount and type of food they want, which will likely naturally be different amounts/combinations.

But how do you work that out evenly if it's not easily divisible? Everyone takes one table spoon one after the other until everyone has had an even amount?

Surely though, if there are four of you, you have a fourth of the dish?

It depends who I'm with to be honest.

Some people are better at sharing than others and some things are more realistic to share. Remember ordering a sharing pudding plate once and it was one big cake thing with x spoons. Just no...

But a little plate of cakes with enough to share out and people you know well...then great.

I love going out for a curry or Thai or whatever when it's big sharing plates on the table and you can try lots of things.

I didn't realise how unpopular sharing was until I saw threads like this. Seems very odd to me that someone would only want one thing off the menu and to eat the whole plateful themselves.

I only order one to two courses. With groups out it has usually been a standard British pub where everyone buys at the bar and there is rarely anything that I would want to share with someone unless there is more than enough and I know I can’t finish it and/or it is really tasty.

I will admit growing up that I found people wanting to share my food when my portion was half the size of theirs and offering me some of theirs in exchange annoying. My mother often called me selfish for not wanting to and guilted me seemingly forgetting what she ordered was nothing I ever liked or wanted.

What I order is what I want and that it. If something else catches my eye, I will try it another visit if possible or get both if it is a starter or dessert since such things are usually quite small anyway.

Unless it is agreed upon beforehand to get different dishes so we can share, I don’t want to share my food with anyone unless I choose to.

I am autistic, and if I went somewhere and it turned out to involve any sort of sharing, I would be unable to eat at all unless it was immediate family. The anxiety over how much I was "allowed" to eat, the worry about people putting their own cutlery into the shared dishes, the worry about people double dipping, the worry about being judged for eating too much or too little...I feel panicky just thinking about it.
If I found myself in that situation, vomiting from stress would be a real possibility, which is why I avoid situations where food is served, unless I am confident that I can hide the fact that I am not eating.

Unless your mothers and MILs run restaurants, it’s hardly relevant.

Well, in my case, I grew up really poor with a lot of siblings. There was often not quite enough food, especially the days before Thursday payday, and everyone was grabbing and gobbling what they could around the table (parents had also grown up with similar, with an added ‘the men get the most and best food, so didn’t impose rules). It left me quite deeply disliking shared food situations, or anything that involves rushed eating, and much preferring having my own portion on my own plate that I can eat as slowly as I like. I’m not a slow eater, but I’d rather not eat at all than ‘competing’ for not quite enough food.

There aren't penis portions in restaurants where most of the forced sharing is happening.

It’s funny, in every single “penis portion” thread there’s hundreds of stories of DMs and MILs dishing up large portions for men and tiny ones for women, and all posters in agreement that buffet style help yourself is absolutely the best way to go to ensure everyone gets the portions they want.

On this thread everyone is saying the opposite! 😂

I don’t mind sharing if there’s loads of it and everyone uses the serving spoons and not their own drooled on cutlery.

I have to remind DH not to double dips crisps and dips when we’re in company.

I hate sharing food too. I don’t mind sharing vegetables with a roast etc, there’s normally enough for everyone, but I went to a wedding where the starter was a board of cold meats, cheeses etc plonked in the middle of a table of 10 strangers. I hated that . Just give me my own portion!

Same here. I want to try a bit of everything and don't want to order entire portions of chips, dessert etc, because I literally do only want about a quarter of a portion.

I didn't realise how unpopular sharing was until I saw threads like this. Seems very odd to me that someone would only want one thing off the menu and to eat the whole plateful themselves.

I don't mind sharing so much if it's agreed beforehand what I do mind is a roast for five people all being served on a board in the middle of the table. I ordered beef, others had lamb. I didn't expect my beef to be covered in lamb juice. Awful.

This is the only instance in which I become a sharer. Perfectly said!

Dh likes to offer me some of his, in the hope that I will offer some of mine. No thanks, and no i wont be giving you my food. Yes you can sulk but i don't care - mitts off!

Thank you! Your first line rang a bell for me. I'd never linked my feelings about sharing food to the autism. So many anxieties around food sharing!

Hate this ‘family style’ food. I like ordering what I want and plan to eat all of it ( or take leftovers for later if can’t finish). I don’t want to try Brenda’s or Stacy’s whatever and don’t want them sticking their mitts in my food.

Not sharing no problem, unless like Joey after refusing to share you then eat the other person's food.

I love sharing. It's normal where I live.

I hate it. It's childhood 'trauma' from my dad forever sticking his fork in everything, including other people's actual plates, when he felt like it.

I've raised DD with a 'share if you genuinely want to' attitude and she's the opposite of me. She can have tapas.

Same here

I was reminded of this. It can be annoying when people want to share your takeaway. But what was annoying was that Nessa joined in. Smithy or Nessa said 'No that's my dish.' I don't think either of them were paying. Cheeky cheapskates - the pair of them.

Omg anyone who tried that would feel my fork stabbing into their hand, including my DH, who knows better than to even attempt it! 🤬 My plate/bowl, my cutlery, my food - noone else comes near it. Get your own bloody food! And yes, if at a buffet with dips, I will put some on a plate or in a bowl for myself. Double dipping is gross.