To labour in my nightdress

I thought if you have an epidural you also have a catheter in as standard? So it must be possible to push the baby with a catheter in?

That being said I don't think you can or would want to request one just for the sake of it! It's an invasive procedure that carries risks.

He wants you to have a catheter? He has absolutely no clue what he’s on about and you need to make it very clear to him that it is NOT his job to make any decisions at all about your labour, it is his job to support you though labour.

He sounds like a prize prick tbh.

Your DH is being a twit to tell you what you can or can't wear during labour.

In all honestly you won't wear your knickers for long. You will be checked for progress, you may need a fetal monitor attaching, your waters may break... it all gets a bit much taking knickers off and on.

WTF is he on about? Seriously!

Why is he getting involved with the detail of YOUR labour, especially as he clearly has no idea what he's talking about?!

Do I think keeping pants on until crowning is realistic?

Probably not.

But you know what, we all have potentially unrealistic plans sometimes, and this isn't one you have to commit to, but you can change your mind in an instant if needed.

So if I were you, I'd hope to keep them off, but plan for 'not'. So take lots of pairs on cases they get covered in bodily fluids, but also wear a very long nightie that totally covers you anyway, and they you just see how it goes!

For reference, 2 children but ELCS, so no labour. However I'm normally very private, so imagine my surprise when I really didn't care less. I was happily whipping off the sheets so they could check on my scar and my pads (no pants), without a care at the world. This being the woman who wouldn't even go to a swimming pool without a sarong to hide my thighs 😂

What's he talking about, you can't have a catheter in while trying to push a baby out! It may not be the same hole but it's damn close! Sorry but you really need to stop listening to your DH, he clearly has NO understanding of the birth process (or female anatomy).

You are not being unreasonable and I was worried about the same thing. Keep your knickers on. The time will come I promise you, where you literally won't care but plan to do what makes you most comfy. I was really anxious about labour and again a very private person. I promise you the midwives will be fine with it and will try and make you as comfy as they can. Best of luck x

From my experience you will find how you feel comfortable as things progress. I personally like a very very over sized cotton nightie and initially wearing underwear, however both ended up removed. My most enjoyable labour happened in only a bra on the floor. Your labour is your experience.

I'm normally very private, but during labour I turned into this creature with absolutely no shame or body issues whatsoever and ended up flinging everything off. Nobody batted an eyelid.

OP, you can wear (or not wear) anything you feel comfortable in.

Yep totally fine. I bought a big nightie with Marie from the aristocats on, in a few sizes bigger than I normally wear so it wasn't tight and wore that all through labour/the birth.

He really is a numty isn’t he. Good luck with your baby. You’re going to need it with your DH.

Not sure you will be able to leave it as long as that as the midwives will need access before that point so they can see how the head is progressing down the birth canal.

Realistically you won't be able to wear them until you're crowning because they'll need to keep an eye on what's happening from the start of the pushing stage, not just when the baby starts to crown. But if you want to keep them on until you need to push that's fine. Take spares, labour can be very liquidy! I laboured naked, unexpectedly, as I'd packed a really long t-shirt but I just felt absolutely boiling hot start to finish. I also had to be continuously monitored and the wires were getting tangled.

Don't worry, there will be time for the midives to take off your knickers before baby comes out I promise - even with a quick labour the baby won't shoot out like an Exocet missile!

Personally I wore a long nightshirt throughout without knickers, but only because I couldn't be faffed with them.

Also your husband sounds like dick

A sports bra?!? You won't want anything tight like that. A nightie is fine. I'd go for knee length. I took a couple as they can get pretty grotty.

The midwife doesn't matter, they will work around you. Just ensure you feel comfortable. I kept my pants on until I felt like pushing and then DP cut them off for me

@Nannyogg134 The DH isn't just saying what he thinks though, he told the OP she's being ridiculous, which is insulting and unkind, wouldn't you agree?

I absolutely love this comment!

Oh yes - the last bit! My ex MiL quizzed my DH relentlessly to find out how noisy I was because she "had 2 big babies without shouting or making a spectacle of herself".

If you're a private person, you might not want all of your experience being shared so make that deal beforehand.

I never wear a nighty but bought one to have dd. You will need to remove your pants through as they need to check and I had a monitor on the baby

Tell him he can wear what he likes when he has a baby but as it's you and your body you'd rather be comfortable in whatever you want to wear.

I wore a night dress and a vest top in the pool

You're way overthinking this. Take comfy clothes suitable for hospital (it's sweltering) and put on/take off whatever seems suitable at the time.

You won't give a flying shit what you look like, or what your husband thinks about it.

It's a messy business though - fairly likely to have wee, amniotic fluid and shit splashing about the place. My waters broke high up and just a bit came out with each contraction for a while. I'd have needed a mountain of pants to change them each time! And most women shit themselves at some point, you want to be able to wipe that off rather than deal with shitty pants, trust me.

I don't know that OP's husband deserves a full Mumsnet pile on, he just comes across to me as a bit of a nervous first time father. DH and I chatted about labour with our first and he also had older sisters who already had a child each, and were full of advice for every stage of pregnancy/labour. Always saying "what you want to do is..." "what I did was..." "ah you say that now, but just you wait when you're in labour..."

This, understandably got DH a bit fretful and he said similar to me about clothing during labour. I used to be fairly prudish and I wanted almost full coverage wherever possible, he was worried that my hopes for labour were a bit unrealistic (they definitely were in the end haha).

I agree with the commenters that OP should feel comfortable and do what it is right for her, but I also think it's not unreasonable for her husband to say what he thinks. If he didn't talk about it at all then he'd get the pile on for not being involved- sometimes men can't get it right for being wrong on MN!