My husband has got the grouting done.

Give him a pat on the head and tell him he's a good boy. Offer him a biscuit if you're feeling generous.

@utilitarianism fellow "man flu" woman. There were studies which showed men and some women may really suffer worse with colds etc. I llok ok, may sound ok but am fucking dying every time I get cold. Which is like once a year for few days.

I tell DH when I do bjgger job (not usual chore) and so does he tell me. I made him come and see groutin a bathroom when I finished😶 Or repaired garden gate. I thought everyone did that.

We totally don't say "I mopped" etc unless it's letting the other know that they don't need to do it be a it's done.

I cured this by announcing every single thing I completed and demanded a response. I also texted him every completed task as I did it when he was at work.
“I emptied the dishwasher!”
”I scrubbed the sink!”
”I made soup!”
”Guess what? The backsplash is sparkling!”
”I have washed a load of darks AND put them in the dryer!”
”We have lovely clean sheets”
”My god there were a lot of dead flies on the windowsill…. They’re all vacuumed up now!”
”The rubbish is out.”
”I replaced the bin bag!”
”I’ve just written a shopping list!”
”I’m off to the supermarket!”
“The shopping’s in the car and I’m getting petrol on the way home!”
”I took the shopping in. There were NINE BAGS!!!!”
”The shopping’s put away! Phew! I really hate separating the chicken breasts and wrapping them all in cling wrap before freezing them!”
”The next load’s finished and the dry washing is folded!”
“I’ve sorted it all and put it on everyone’s bed!”

Took two days before he lost his shit. I pointed out how sulky he was when I asked if he wanted a medal for unloading the dish rack and drying a couple of wine glasses on the weekend, so I thought that this was something we did now.

I do this for some things, too, particularly if it's not an 'everyday' chore. DH and I give one another a brief daily account of what we did, as well. I'd find it annoying if it was clear that someone was telling me in a passive aggressive way, to indicate that they did something they thought I should have done. Otherwise, doesn't bother me.

I also feel very sorry for myself and miserable when I have a cold or other minor illness, so I guess I get 'man flu', too.

I think there is a slight difference between telling someone you've done the grouting or rubbed down some paintwork and telling someone you've Hoovered the front room or done some laundry. The former things relate to actual permanent changes to the house, so I think I'd tell DP if I'd done something like that too. But I wouldn't tell him I'd, say, done a bit of dusting or cleaned the bath.

That said, I think the division of labour in our house is fairly even, so I don't think there's ever that annoying feeling that one of is acting like they deserve a medal for doing one thing when the other person's done everything else that week.

Today my male workmate hoovered and mopped the little kitchenette while I was on my coffee break. The lecture he gave on mop types was both educational and thorough. It saved me from wasting my time on mumsnet.

Door lock update!!!
I have now had the superbness of the fix demonstrated to me. I suspect he was laying in wait pretending to make coffee until I was heading out with the washing. There was no escape.
I'm not sure I kept an entirely straight face.

It's a tough one because when people do this it's often a bid for connection, but a boring one!

Being condescending or dismissive is usually not best approach, shutting down these attempts to connect is what kills relationships. But then smiling and nodding is dishonest and doesn't stop the guy being dull...

My DH does this and I scream ‘stop fucking listing things’. If he’s pleased with a particular job he’s done my reaction is entirely dependent on my mood, sometimes I shower him with praise and say it’s fucking fantastic. Other times if I’m in somewhat of a piss I say ‘can’t tell the difference, but as long as you’re pleased with it.’

Yesterday mine text me to tell me he'd just had his breakfast.

I was upstairs.

I didn't answer

I always give mine a kind look and ask if he wants a medal.

He takes it in good cheer lol!

Luckily for mine, he has his good points.

Update on the back door lock (I know you were all worrying).
He's fixed it! He didn't take me to look at it, but did point out the smoothness of operation when I went out through it later. Apparently he managed to re use the old screws which is good because they were a funny size. And the plate had to be fitted at a slight angle because something. And it was tricky because hardly any tolerance (he explained what he meant by that, lucky me).
But he's VERY pleased with himself. Bless.
Frankly I'm amazed I retained so much of that information 😁

How you've all not murdered your husbands by now is beyond me 😁

To be fair - if I did any grouting I would certainly make a song and dance about it. I hate housework, DIY & gardening and expect a ticker tape whenever I do any. DH is the same - we encourage each other in our unreasonable demands for admiration for completing basic household tasks. For grouting I would expect at least bards and minstrels singing my praises.

My BIL sorted out a plumbing issue for me and took detailed videos of the process which he sent me via WhatsApp 😀

I think for him it's not an "I'm amazing" situation, its more because he loves his job and especially loved sleuthing out a problem (my house has a really weird plumbing setup), and he just assumes it's as interesting to everyone else as it is to him, whereas I just wanted water restored to my bathroom and didn't really care how it was achieved.

I manage laundry zero a few times a year at most. To right I announce it to the house. Usually only lasts a couple of hours though.

Mutual appreciation society in our house too.

"I washed my cup up"
🙄

I manage it about twice a year and it takes focus, good weather, and the Desire To Achieve.

You can do it

My ex cooks and posts it on Facebook he also used to take the children to a park get them to pose for pictures send me the pictures post them and bring them home early he literally was supposed to have them for 2.5 hours and bought them home EARLY his Facebook posts were all "family time" "my boys my life"" home too soon" ☠️

My exH used to cook about 6 times a year but he would talk about it so much that my exBIL was under the impression that he did all the cooking in the house.
One weekend I was at my sister's house and he decided to finally fill in some holes on the driveway. He made a little video of what he was doing and sent it to me on WhatsApp.
ExH for a reason.

This really annoys me too! Like he does t wear clothes or eat off plates etc.