Dressing up in sexy lingerie

'Empowered' just makes me think of all the women, in the 90s, who did FHM photo shoots wearing lingerie/bikins.

They said they felt 'empowered', but i always felt like their hearts weren't really in it.
I'm sure their agent's had a lot to do with it, as well.

The most sexy thing for a man isn't the lingerie, it's him feeling wanted.

Men are often 'accused' of having a higher sex drive and hinting for/pushing for it. Take control and make him a priority, and it will go down a thousand times better than any lingerie, which is usually off on 30 seconds anyway!

(Works both ways).

I think it's ridiculous. We are not dolls.

One of my best mates (male) said men don't care how you look or what you are wearing, if you are naked it's enough.

"Empowering to be drooled over"

JFC this is the biggest lie ever sold to us as women, we are not objects to be drooled over.

This is it.

Wearing lingerie makes me feel empowered and gives me confidence. I love seeing DH drool over me and getting turned on by what I’m wearing. I genuinely am shocked that it is not more of a common thing. It’s so interesting how your own relationship and experiences can shape how you perceive what the ‘norm’ is in relationships.

Did it once, DH laughed like a drain. Didn't do it again.

I’m 40 something and I’m very much midway on this. Some would argue l spend too much on lingerie, but l go for pretty and practical for day to day wear. I am not a multi pack of knickers from the supermarket type of girl. I like to feel good and confident underneath it all. I always buy 2 pairs of matching knickers when l buy a new bra, although l supplement with others. I aspire to match but don’t always. Regardless l love (soft) lace and bold colours. I don’t have anything in white or so called “nude” which to me looks like cardboard.

l think it’s important to look nice when someone sees you undressing or dressing. But l don’t have anything with holes strategically placed and for sex it all comes off, l want to be naked, although l love being slowly undressed.

I dont understand how some people don't understand why some women wear sexy undies for their partner. Some women just find it a turn on seeing how turned on their partner gets for them or like doing something they know they like. It's not degrading or placating or being treated like a blow-up doll etc.

Anyway, I do have some nice undies for this reason. I save them for special occasions or nights out. It builds anticipation for us both.

Yep.
In my opinion it's because there's not that much stuff that can really enhance a mans body sexually.

I think men look best in really simple boxer briefs, plain black or white.

Any male lingerie I've seen just doesn't flatter their bodies and I think it's predominantly gay men who like it.

I do sexy lingerie but I cobble it together from bits and bobs if necessary - by this time it's a desperate situation and my DH will take anything he can get.

In my 30s I just wore what was comfortable (babies and children to look after). In my 40s and 50s I wore pretty matching sets as I loved how they looked. I also wore suspenders and stockings on evenings out as they added to the pzazz of the evening. I once walked around with my DH on a weekend in Paris late at night while wearing nothing but a black basque, stockings & high heels under a long coat. His blood pressure was probably sky high which might not have been a good idea as we were both over 50 but it was hilarious! In my 60s I moved back towards comfort but on an evening out, I'll still go for the pretty things.

I would never wear lingerie just for somebody else because it wouldn't be authentic. It has to be because I want to do it for myself, like dabbing on a fabulous scent or wearing my best jewellery adds to my enjoyment of a special event.

I like it but DP is utterly unmoved by it! (On anyone, not just me).

I wear it. I wear it because I want to. Makes me feel good. I have learnt how into sex I am is directly tied into how much he seems to want me. I have loads of it. I usually buy stuff you don't have to take off.

Me too.

Oh and to add DH does have some very nice silk boxers which I really like. Nothing OTT but it adds to the sense of the occasion.

I have never felt that I had to do it, but I know DH likes it and I am happy to do it for him. I feel quite good in it, particularly for the reaction it gets and I do enjoy selecting it. Mostly good quality M+S stuff.

I’m partial to nice underwear, but for me and not to ‘dress up’ for someone else.
It seems so outdated now - I don’t get my self worth/ value from how a man reacts seeing me dressed up for sex. I feel that went out in the 90s with a lot of other misogynistic guff. Can you imagine a man doing this for a woman?! 😄
A nice perfume and a smile will do….

Reminds me of Benny Hill or Carry On Films. Something that dirty old men ‘F’nar F’nar’ about. Nope. Sexy is what genuinely turns a woman on psychologically and physiologically. Not some superficial wainscotting for the visual titillation of men.

You don't have outfits that make you feel good? That you feel nice in, that make you look in the mirror and think 'I look fabulous'. No different to how I feel in nice, sexy underwear.

As for sex and positions? I like sex, in fact I love it, I can't think of a disadvantage to trying new and varied sexual positions, either fortnightly or otherwise!

This topic reminds me that you don't have men's magazines telling their readers how to please their wives.

If anyone still reads Cosmopolitan, I remember it was like that issue after issue.
And 'More' had 'the position of the week'.

It's only women who are told that they have to up the ante to keep their man happy.

It's funny, really.

I hate it. I don't find it comfortable or attractive and I've yet to see a man voluntarily get themselves dressed up in lace and silk to please a woman.

Exactly. When we all know that (some) men would have sex with a car exhaust.

I don't think it's sexist and outdated particularly but I really could not be bothered haha I don't even shave my legs most of the time 🤣.

I think if it were an expectation it wouldn't be great but if women want to dress up and it makes them feel good, what's the harm?

🎯

I used to do the whole 'nurses outfit and stripper heels' thing with (now) DH in my early 20s.
I wouldn't do that now (aged 40) because:
A - I'd feel like a bit of a tit
B - I can't be arsed
I now do plan for sex on occassion, rather than it being spontaneous, but put on a nice fancy-looking (ish) matching set of my regular underwear instead.
I think as long as you both want to do something, then fantastic - go for it. But if one of you is doing something under duress, then obviously that's not OK.

There's an in between stage, matching, but still comfortable, got some good ones in Sainsbury's last year