AIBU to accept to feel so hopeless surrounding my binge eating

I struggle too. My best strategies
1 have lots of healthy food about
2 cook from scratch where possible
3 no ice cream, cake, biscuits, crisps in the house as much as possible
4 nuts/bananas to snack on
5 cooking ingredients so I can make a cake in a mug cake etc if I really need to and don't go to the shop
6 continue COVID rules and do occasional big shops at the supermarket not lots of little ones

I don't always follow them but I try

Thanks for posting OP, you have begun a good and useful discussion.

I have struggled with disordered eating as a coping mechanism for stress but over 10 years and a chronic illness which means it can be hard to exercise, this has meant that I have put on a lot of weight. I also have childhood trauma as well.

I really feel this carrying of extra weight in my joints now, knees and hips are creaky and complaining. Beginning arthritis, and I know this can be relieved by up to 50% by reducing my size but it is hard once your brain is wired into a certain pattern around food. But not impossible.

As you said, it's not good for our bodies/health long term. I'd like to find a way to reduce my size.

Following with interest!

Lots of replies now, @Glucose95!

Please do NOT recommend Ozempic for someone with childhood trauma and Binge Eating DISORDER.

As per my previous post, please explore CBT for binge eating disorder.

Do not take Ozempic.

Watch Georgia Ede on YouTube, she explains really clearly how what you eat effects how you feel.

The problem with ozempic is that it is not permanent. The feeling only lasts as long as you take it. I have tried this drug and in all honesty it was great in terms of ‘food noise’ but it’s just a temporary solution to lose weight it is not therapy or life long changes, if you have to stop taking it (as I did, it made me unwell with gallbladder colic) all the previous feelings return to you. I would be wary of using this drug in isolation to try to cure an eating disorder as there is no support or therapy that comes with it.

Hi OP, my cousin was in a similar position to you and has been taking ozempic since Feb. Not only has she lost loads of weight, but she said the biggest positive is that it has silenced all the ‘food noise’ in her head. She is no longer constantly thinking about the next thing she is going to eat, no longer unable to resist over eating, no longer influenced by other people eating. She is finally happy and a healthy weight after 20 years.

I am in recovery from binge eating but I think I only got there by engaging in CBT about my childhood trauma and also managing stress responses. I had severe OCD and anxiety over the years and binge eating they all overlapped so treating some of these helped to treat binge eating as I was taught coping mechanisms. I was not able to find specific binge eating counselling but I went to CBT anyway and it really did help. I accept I could have a relapse back into binging but every day that I don’t relapse is a positive, the same way I don’t smoke anymore and I don’t use alcohol as a coping strategy.

the way I see it is that if we are not taught how to cope with feelings as a child we will find our own ways but they can be destructive, so you have to do CBT to re-parent yourself back onto learning healthy coping mechanisms. Through therapy I changed other things about my life, like I cut off or limited contact with my parents as this was continually triggering me.

good luck x

I am on Wegovy and it has helped my bingeing. I have lost three stone on it too. I also completely cut out dairy from my diet previous to this and that helped a lot too. I stopped drinking alcohol as well as that triggered bingeing. It is a really hard thing to stop though. The Wegovy has helped more than anything else, but it is expensive unfortunately.

If it started with childhood trauma I would start there. Once you heal the wound, you can start to unlearn the unhealthy coping mechanisms and develop new ways to self soothe.

Hi OP. I'm very similar. I wonder if this kind of thing can also be genetic.
My mum was bulimic when I was growing up; dad had major alcohol and gambling issues. Both were strict about food and are 'anti-fat'. I've definitely got an obsessive/addictive personality when it comes to food.
I wish I were the sort of person - like everyone else I know! - who could be the same weight from year to year. However I could be 5 stone lighter or heavier, depending on whether or not I'm dieting!
It's a bit of a nightmare actually.

Following because in a similar position. It’s scary not being in control. Been binge eating since I was a child. Lots of trauma when I was young and now it’s literally any small upset that sets me off. Yesterday my daughter fell over in the garden and cut herself. I felt so awful that after I sorted her out I ate 6 bars of chocolate and four cakes. That’s when people are around. When I’m alone it’s much worse.

Hi OP.

I'm a psychotherapist and I treat Binge Eating Disorder among others. I predominantly use Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT).

I would advise you to refer to your local IAPT/wellbeing team. This is a free NHS therapy service. Either self refer (google your county/borough and wellbeing team - I.e Nottinghamshire Talking Therapies self referral) or you can discuss with your GP and they can refer you.

CBT is coping strategy focused so it will take you through the factors contributing to the development of your binge eating. We then focus on what is maintaining your binge eating disorder. Finally we move on to coping strategies to stop the cycle.

Waiting times vary massively from area to area so id refer asap.

Good luck!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0012rhj
I hope this link works - Richard Osman speaking about his binge eating disorder

I know little about disordered eating but OP, I think it's really positive that you are not lying to yourself. You are owning this and as you probably already know, permanent change can only ever come from within. So I reckon you stand a bloody good chance of getting things under control.

I used to often binge eat from getting home after work until dinner time. I read a book about binge eating and one thing that stayed with me was, every time you want to eat something and you're not actually hungry, don't say no to yourself. Tell yourself you can have anything you want to eat, whenever you want. The psychology behind this is we tend to want things more if we are told we can't have them. If you give yourself permission it becomes less attractive. Sounds weird but it worked for me

Like anything else though, this is a habit and it takes a while to break a habit & find a new one

Hi @Glucose95 ,
I could have written your post many many times over the years and I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. I'm 52 and I've suffered from this my entire life. I've gained and lost 30-40kg over and over again in vicious cycles. I'd like to be able to tell you that I'm completely better now but I can't. I do manage things better now though and can recognise and switch out of the binge cycles much quicker than I have done in the past. It's still there lurking in the background but I'm not on the rollercoaster any more. I'm going to list some of the things I've found helpful and if they are useful to you or anyone else reading this I'm glad I could share.

1. Gillian Riley https://event.webinarjam.com/register/215/p45nlhvl

1. Brain over binge - this again was a very helpful book. I can't say it completely worked for me and I didn't relate to a lot of her experience. But it did help, I learned a few techniques which again have stayed with me.
2. The CVT Ultraprocessed People book. I know that you were moderating UPFs before this binge cycle and I can only advise that you try and gradually reduce again. Even one at a time. I don't think they were the underlying cause of my BED but they are designed to be highly palatable and addictive. So if you suffer from BED they really are kryptonite. I approached this by gradually reducing rather than going all out. So I identified Chocolate as my no 1 binge food. So I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted apart from chocolate. When I felt that was manageable I turned my attention to processed white bread and so on.
3. Some CBT to address my reactions to stress, anxiety and other feelings. I have very black and white thinking so if I eat one chocolate bar or have a bad few days I often just throw in the towel and eat all the food for months and months (and perhaps longer...). CBT has taught me to be more moderate in my thinking, pause before reacting and has helped me take a deep breath and reset earlier on in the binge cycle.
4. Exercise is what I call my 'keystone' habit. If I get some proper exercise every day, lots of other stuff falls into place. It's essential to my mental health and managing stress and other strong emotions. Lots of other positive stuff (sleep, bowels, boosted immune system etc) related to exercise for me. I plan and prioritise it.
5. Slightly left field - Richard Osman - if you can find where he has written and spoken about his lifelong BED and how he has learned to be compassionate to himself and accept that this will always be with him somewhere in the background. I'll post a link if I can find it.

Take a semi-glutide injection like monjaro. It's scaffolding whilst you overhaul exercise and nutrition (like antidepressants are).

You'll see you've been living life on hard mode and that once the food noise goes away you can manage your eating. It's not willpower, it's biological. It's not a quick fix, it's therapeutic in making sustainable changes.

And then flog clothes on vinted and buy clothes on there. Almost cost neutral.

I’m following with interest OP. I know I have this with a bit of the occasional bulimia thrown in when I have completely pigged out.
I need help I know. I can eat an entire snack cupboard
i also believe it’s related to childhood trauma

I went to the GP at 18 about my unhealthy relationship with food. I got nowhere. I'm now 61 and it's no better. A lifetime of dieting and bingeing.
I've just adopted the Glucose Goddess Principles in the hope that stable insulin release will reduce cravings. Couple that with mindful eating and I am hoping to get somewhere.

Sorry no advice but I could have wrote your post word for word OP. Have a look at BEAT online

I have no personal experience of this, however one of my friends has binge eating disorder and we figured out that it's really psychologically similar to my trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling). We both do it in the same situations when we're stressed and tired, and we end up in a flow state just preoccupied with hair pulling/gorging. We both have ADHD (and autism but I don't think that's related).

I went on a pure fruit diet for a while in an attempt to cure some health problems (with mixed results). There's a theory that sugar cravings are your body's way of telling you you're not eating enough fruit, which I personally believe because I'm not interested in sugar hardly at all after the fruit diet.

Could you try having a pre-breakfast of 3 portions of fruit every day?

What is causing your stress OP? Is it something you can tackle ie by changing jobs? Why have your stress levels suddenly gone through the roof this past year? I wondered if it was actually your anxiety levels rather than your stress levels and if an antidepressant for anxiety might help you? Have you ever watched My 600lb life? Childhood trauma is almost always the reason for it. It would definitely be worth seeing if you could get some help with that too.

OP, I sympathise, I am addicted to sugar and can't stop 😭