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AIBU?

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Original poster

To message neighbour?

88 replies

Possomoppossum · 04/05/2024 19:34

I've lived where I have for the past 2 years and recently a guy has moved into a flat underneath me.He seems single and the other day,passed me his phone number in the hallway.At first,I was a bit shocked and didn't think to do anything,however,we both appear single,why do I feel like this is a mistake ready to happen? He seems lovely,is fit and very polite,is it just too close for comfort if things go wrong?

OP posts:
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Original poster
Possomoppossum · 30/05/2024 21:52

So far,it's been really good.We hook up once/twice a week but keep our distance at other times so it doesn't feel suffocating.We both get a physical release and a bit of fun,but it doesn't impact our everyday lives,so tbh I'm really glad I went for it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Possomoppossum · 21/05/2024 20:49

Thanks I don't think either of us want more than sex so fingers crossed it will work out well x

OP posts:
Ginkypig · 21/05/2024 19:09

My comment was nothing to do with the shagging. my view is sex is a natural part of life and as long as everyone and everything is consensual then go to town!

It was to do with the fact that choosing someone who literally lives next door sounds great and convenient if it works and everything stays easy but if that someone turns out to be a weirdo or develops feelings then gets clingy and annoying or worse creepy and stalkery or turns out to be an abusive arsehole it means your stuck with it. unless you up stick and move!

im glad it worked out though for you.

Pettyman · 21/05/2024 18:52

It’s exactly the kind of thing I’d have done 30 years ago, that’s why I know it’s a bad idea

Ratatouille1 · 21/05/2024 18:44

Go for it, I think if everyone took advice on here as to when it was OK to date/ shag/ have a relationship no one would ever get off with anyone ever

Original poster
Possomoppossum · 21/05/2024 18:40

Think there's 5 years between us but I have always gone with men at least 4/5 years older so to me it feels young.

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Revelatio · 21/05/2024 16:19

3yrs younger?!! I think it needs to be at least 10 for a younger man surely!!

Original poster
Possomoppossum · 21/05/2024 16:13

Well it was a few weeks back when he gave me his number,I gave him mine a few days later and since then,we've been texting and hooking up a couple of times a week.It is relaxed,no-commitment sex and so far is working out fine.We are both clear that it is just sex and we have no other ties.Tbh it gives me something to look forward to and the sex is good plus we don't bother each other unless we are looking to meet up so I don't regret anything so far.

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rainbowbee · 20/05/2024 22:43

Don't shit where you eat...
In the way of men, he could have any number of behavioural problems and you can't even lock him out of the building!

CoffeeAndPeanuts · 20/05/2024 22:36

Possomoppossum · 10/05/2024 22:36

Just wanted to keep details vague but if u see now,its not so weird to dissappear upstairs for 20 mins?

20 minutes?? Hardly worth the angst!

Original poster
Possomoppossum · 20/05/2024 22:18

He is younger and has a fit body but I would say that I was more attractive tbh have since found out he is 3 yrs younger than me which is great tbh.We have fallen into the pattern of having sex 3 times a week or so and it's really good so am I being a a hole?

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Shiningout · 11/05/2024 13:57

Possomoppossum · 10/05/2024 22:24

Not being awful but if he wasn't available and younger,I wouldn't even bother.Its not me punching,it's him.

I thought he was lovely and really fit? You keep getting caught telling Porkies Op 😂

BirthdayRainbow · 11/05/2024 13:57

misszebra · 10/05/2024 22:42

people are jealous OP. good for you, and so what what anyone else thinks. if he's fit, nice and convenient why not

No one is jealous!

21ZIGGY · 11/05/2024 13:57

The jealousy on here😂 go for it OP

BirthdayRainbow · 11/05/2024 13:53

Fancied a bit?

🙄

How are you not swooning?

Mayhemmumma · 11/05/2024 13:49

Sounds great op!

Carsarelife · 11/05/2024 13:24

@Possomoppossum yep I know exactly how you feel. I always give it a try and to date none of my FWB have been one nighters which makes me feel slightly better. What have you got to lose? That's how you have to think of it.

Original poster
Possomoppossum · 11/05/2024 12:46

Thanks@Carsarelife ,after being with my son's dad for so long and now having a bit of freedom and just a bit of escapism gives me a little boost and something to bother to get excited about iykwim,just lifts me a bit

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Carsarelife · 11/05/2024 09:50

If it was me I'd totally go for it. That's my advice. I'm 51 now and still do this type of thing if the opportunity is there. You only get one life and sex can be such a beautiful release

Original poster
Possomoppossum · 11/05/2024 08:03

OK,so as not to be too obvious,I changed a few details.In reality,he is in the upstairs flat,my son is 14.I guess he is around 35 whereas I am in my 40s.When I said he was hot and it was an ego boost,that's true,when I was describing us,I would say that even though I was older,I was probably more conventionally good looking.I just changed a few bits and pieces but essentially everything is true.

OP posts:
SpringerFall · 11/05/2024 01:50

misszebra · 10/05/2024 22:42

people are jealous OP. good for you, and so what what anyone else thinks. if he's fit, nice and convenient why not

How do you know people are jealous? This never makes sense

Frangipanyoul8r · 11/05/2024 01:01

I can’t see the issue but then I have no shame and would be 100% fine just pretending the whole thing never happened if it all went wrong.

drusth · 11/05/2024 00:34

Possomoppossum · 10/05/2024 22:24

Not being awful but if he wasn't available and younger,I wouldn't even bother.Its not me punching,it's him.

I thought you said he was fit and hot and the ego boost you needed, so it’s you punching? Keep your story straight at least.

slaggybumbum · 11/05/2024 00:27

Goodness. Gives you his number in corridor case you fancy a bit- pop downstairs for 20 mins?

CaraDeLaVagine · 10/05/2024 23:46

Fair play to you as long as it's mutual fwb, enthusiastic consent, no red flags, protection being used and you don't catch feelings.
It sounds handy, practical, fun, a bit naughty and frivolous.
Enjoy it!

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