To still use a car seat for my 10 year old?

Yes, if the DC are under 135cm, which is likely if they are six, then it's law that they must use a booster seat. High back or booster cushion, either is legal but they must use one of them.

As said I think we are in a slight blind spot where the parents of primary aged DC now are aware of the need for car seats up to early primary but then after this they assume no longer needed, because the publicity about the 135cm/12 years rule has gone away as it is assumed that everyone now knows about the law change, which happened 21 years ago. But if you are currently in your mid to late 30s or 40s and currently have primary aged DC, then the law may have totally passed you by, because it wouldn't have affected you at the time, why would you have been watching news reports about car seats for children? You were probably down the pub.

Adults who are in their 20s now would have been directly affected by that law as children and might even remember going back into a booster seat. So it will fix itself in about 5-10 years. But we could do with an awareness campaign.

I’ve been in a bad car accident, my eldest child was 7 at the time and her HBB kept her so safe, I was incredibly impressed with it. She came out of a car that had crashed and flipped upside down with not a bruise or a scratch on her. If she hadn’t been in one she’d have been thrown round like a rag doll.

it was a road we have driven on hundreds of times. I didn’t do anything wrong, couldn’t have predicted or prevented it. But the car seat did its job. Mine will be in them til they no longer fit.

I do see little kids at school just jumping in their parents cars with no car seats. I just don’t get it. It’s a no brainer. Use the car seat!!

I did NOT do a driving course at the age of 10 and passed my driving test at 17 first time. Definitely not an exclusive relationship!

OP I’d be reminding other parents of the LAW the next time they try and make you feel like you are doing something wrong by your own child. You are also responsible for any child in your car so if they are under 135cm they need to be in a booster. My son is 137 at the age of 7 but will be in his hbb until he physically can’t fit anymore ( I am also a ‘terrible’ rear facing til 25kg advocate 🤪).

Travelling in a car is the highest risk thing the majority of us do. My kids will travel the safest way they can.

You do what you feel comfortable with.

my 3.5 year old is still rear-facing, none of my friends kids are (and most haven’t since about 18months) so I’m pretty sure my friends think I’m a bit overprotective but having done my research (and working as an A&E nurse) I’ve decided that this is what is right for us and he’ll be staying rear-facing until at least 5. I’m not sure how long he’ll stay in a HBB for but he’s short so likely 10+. It is what it is but at least I know he’s as safe as i possibly can make him and if anything was to happen I wouldn’t have any regrets.

I do the helmet thing. It's not because I think it's a risk riding in the garden at home, it's because my kids struggle with what they see as inconsistencies, so it's easier to just say bike = helmet rather than an argument about why they have to wear it today but didn't yesterday.

My DC are 6.5 & 8.5, they will stay in HBB car seats until the safe heights are passed. Do have booster seats for use in other cars (though got to get one HBB back into everyday use instead of a booster).
I explain to the DC about safety and they do accept it.
The HBB are a pain to move about but do not want to compromise safety.... especially with the driving I see on the roads!

it is great to keep your child in a booster as long as they are willing. But if your older child is seriously mortified, begging you not to and at risk of social ostracism, don’t forget that mental health is also important.
the rate of teen suicide is far, far higher (close to 100 x) than the rate of death inside a car.

I'm shocked at the vote and some of the comments!!

@ExcitedButNervous0424 you are right to use one for safety and for complying with the law!!

I wouldn't give a fuck if anyone made fun of me or my child for it. At least my child would have a better chance of surviving a car crash, and that's what's most important here.

My eldest is still in a HBB, and she's a lot older than your son! She loves her seat. She'll likely be in it until she's 150cm, if she even makes it that tall (she's tiny!).

Car seat safety is one thing I'd never compromise on. Anyone taking the piss can seriously fuck off.

My MIL decided that my daughter could stop using the HBB I had given her for her car a couple of weeks back ….. daughter is 9 and only 125cm, I was fuming as she hasn’t even asked me so I had to say she’s too small and also told my daughter that she needs to continue using it for her own safety. She is petite for her age at 125cm so she will remain using it until she meets the legal requirements. Her safety is more important than looking cool.

I am with you, I kept both of mine now (almost) 13 and 10.5, in HBB until they outgrew them due to height/shoulders, we then went to normal booster. I was amazed at the amount of much smaller sized peers using nothing, my eldest was embarrassed but I explained the safety aspect and he got it.
The same for those letting children ride in the front seat, it's a strict no from me until they are large enough. My 10yo is tall, has been the tallest in his class for 3yrs, is broad shouldered too but no way is he in the front seat until he is nearer 12 and his skeleton is more robust.

The adults have mature musculature which I guess helps stabilise the head a bit. Cars and seatbelts and safety tests don't adequately represent the full range of adult body sizes and morphologies; some adults are just inherently less safe in cars than other adults. Unfortunately, you have to put up with cars that are mostly a bit less safe for you than they are for a more average-western-height adult. It's not very fair, is it?

UK car seat legislation is so lax compared to the rest of Europe, I was shocked recently when shopping for a new seat for my son (outgrown his infant carrier seat) at how low the standards are. I’m deciding which Swedish Tested rear facing seat to get, I was also shocked at how there are so many unsafe seats available in the UK- it’s appalling! I know it’s not what you asked, just shocked me recently. I would never forgive myself if something preventable happened in a car accident so I think my son will be in a car seat and booster for as long as I can, I know it’s hard when his friends don’t use them but I’d stick to my guns on this issue.

I joined a group on Facebook called Car Seat Safety Uk (I think that’s the name) and it was quite eye-opening for me!

My DD aged 9 will be in hers until 150cm or 12 years old. The law in this country is 135cm but 150cm in other European countries.

And if they are in a serious car accident they will be less protected by the seatbelt than a taller person. I’m not sure what your point is?

Always worth reading @BertieBotts informative posts on this thread! My 9yo likes being in her HBB and I'll keep both DC in them for as long as they fit.

It's not at all unreasonable for you to want to do what you think is right for your child, and nor is it unreasonable for your son to question why he's using on when his friends aren't. Answer his questions, give your reasons, and ask why he thinks other parents aren't also requiring their children to use a seat. Have a discussion with him. There will likely be other issues in future where your son will want to do things differently to how you want him to do them, so you may as well both get some negotiation practice in now ;-)

As to what's the norm, I have no idea. My n=1 experience is that my extremely tall for age kid still used a high back booster at 11, since it was more comfortable than having the seatbelt at the wrong height. Predicting from growth charts that my kids would reach 135cm before age 7, I'd purchased comfy high backed boosters rated for taller and heavier kids than most seats on the market, so that they could at least stay in them until the age an average height kid would reach 135cm, and hopefully longer, which they happily did.

The harness he uses is just to stop him escaping!

It does seem unusual. My almost 7 year old is just in a booster now & many of their friends aren’t in a car seat at all. Is it actually law they be in one? Because all these parents are pretty sensible, reasonable people…

But they’re over the age if 12 when they’re bones have harden. But to honest for most people, let’s face it mostly women, under 150 cm their seat belts probably aren’t fitted probably and aren’t keeping them safe. There is a book about how science and technology are all geared towards the male body which covers this issue.

There are some fully grown women that are only 150cm!!

Haven’t read the full thread.
HBB exist up to 150cm
my 143cm 10 year old is on a booster cushion because otherwise the seatbelt digs into his neck.

im perplexed by the amount of people suggesting he go without a seat tbh.
hes your son, do what you feel is best.

this thread has the same vibe as the people who forward face their toddlers ‘because their legs look cramped’ 🙄

are you on Facebook? A group called ‘car seat safety uk’ will put your mind at ease - he needs to be in a seat so well done you and ignore the rest!

For a harness attached to the car seat, yes you must stick to the weight limit as it would be dangerous to overload.

Some special needs car seats have a harness which is just for postural support and doesn't have a weight limit. The adult seatbelt is the restraint in this case.

High back boosters approved to the older safety standard R44 could not be certified any higher than 36kg - this should be ignored as it's just a legislation issue.

High back boosters approved to the current safety standard R129 don't need to specify a weight limit, but some do. If you're using in conjunction with a crelling harness or similar, the specialist retailer you've bought from should be able to advise about weight limits.

It’s interesting that the UK has more lax car seat rules but still has almost the lowest child mortality in traffic accidents in Europe. Driving children aim the uk is very safe. I’m not arguing for not using all the best seats just observing that it’s already a very safe activity. It’s not where I would put campaigning effort if I was trying to reduce harm to children.

What about the weight limit though.. every one I've had has a weight limit. Current one is 45kg and that's biggest I could find as my child is special needs and needs harness etc. Is it not a safety issue to put then in if too heavy?

I don't actually think this is true - I know the car seat group admins all say it but I don't understand where it comes from. An adult under 135cm is going to have an extremely poor belt fit in any car and is going to be more vulnerable to injury. Adults with dwarfism are advised to avoid travelling in front of an active airbag as it can injure them.

As several posters have said on this thread, seatbelts sometimes don't fit correctly even at 150cm+ up to about 160cm.

It's not a coincidence that a 9th centile adult man is 158cm (about 5'3") and 91st centile is 195cm (about 6'5") - seatbelts don't fit as well for anyone outside those parameters.

For comparison the women;s 9th-91st centile height range is 147-180cm (4'10" - 5'11"). About 60-70% of adult women overlap the majority male height range, so more than 1 in 3 are outside it.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2019-07-18/why-women-are-likelier-to-be-hurt-in-a-car-crash