To never leave the house ever again

I've got a 1 and 2 year old as well and really empathise with this. Taking them anywhere is so fucking exhausting and stressful. I feel like there's something wrong with me for finding it so difficult to cope with sometimes. You're not alone

Delivery

My mum tells the story of when I was 2, we were in Iceland, when it just used to be vast aisles of huge, open, freezers full of frozen food. I was sat in the trolley, she turned her back, and I’d climbed out of the seat and was scarpering across the frozen chickens. They were set out in groups of 4, and as she went one way to get me out, I’d dash the other way. Took her about 10 mins to catch me whilst everyone tutted. 2 year olds are hard work.

We are all in the same boat!
Maybe I have been lucky, but my 2yo tantrums are usually met sympathetic looks from other parents. Can't wait for his sister to get started, yeah!

My eldest has always and still is a handful, to the point I didnt take him to anyones house exceot family, or anywhere he couldnt roam around like soft play between 2 and 4. Its easier when they are a bit bigfer. It gets better, I just found different ways. The JUST EAT app will have groceries delivered from sainsburys in 20 mins for example. Also look up nursery creches theres one near me where you can drop off for up to two hours ad hoc if they have space and go to the auoermarket nearby. Theres also a cafe near me with a supervised soft play for under 4s where you can have a coffee in relative peace. Find these places, they will give you peace

Weve all been there. Online food shopping either delivered or click and collect is the way forward

If it keeps happening get home delivery. It’s not great for babies/toddlers to be woken from naps. Or at least try and time going shopping/out after a nap so they won’t be cranky.

I’m sure most people weren’t judging you, all children get upset when out sometimes. Bit interfering from the lady but perhaps she was just trying to help?

what a nasty woman!

try to forget about it op. Most of us would be silently sympathising. It gets easier to manage I promise.

What a self-righteous interfering.old cow Sorry it made you feel awful. We have all been there and we are all trying out best.

Why do people always feel the need to give their 2 pence when it isn’t needed? Instead of offering to try and console her she feels the need to put you down further? I’d have just stared blankly at her until she got bored. Kids are…to put it nicely..delightful aren’t they?! I’m wondering if you’re able to use a trolley instead? So DD is sat in the seat rather than the buggy? Or was it not supermarket shopping?

Every single parent in that store has been there. Some will be judgemental and unfortunately they are the ones most vocal. Everyone else knows how you feel as they have been there themselves. Don't stop going out just because of a few vocal old biddies. Most of the people minding their own business will have had so much sympathy with you but didn't want to interfere.

Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.

Unfortunately these people are everywhere. They always think they know best.

Sorry OP. Sounds like today got overwhelming. It’s the hardest job, and isn’t made easier by judgemental a-holes.

my dd would have struggled out of my arms if I’d picked her up mid hissy.

people need to mind their business or actually help.

it gets better 😘

Tesco delivery saver is your friend here. You also don’t buy any random extras or £6 magazines for the kids!

What an enlightening response! How helpful a person you must be.

I've had some lovely older ladies offer to carry my shopping in a similar situation.

We've all been there. She should have said 'you poor mum, what can I do to help?'. Tesco orders for a while? Make life as easy for yourself as you can.

You asked if your toddler wanted help with shopping? Huh

Learn from your experiences. If she does this everytime and you think it is just a phase or an age thing then be organised and get your shopping delivered. If you needed essentials and have shops within walking distance, go there instead.

Re the classes just avoid till the kids are a little bit older or go with a friend or partner if you have one so each child can be supervised. I found free play classes easier when I had 2 under 2 as I could leave as and when I needed to without disturbing anyone else unlike in an organised activity or music class. They won't suffer if they aren't going to classes at this age.

Oh God - such flashbacks...! DD was pretty chill but DS just hated the supermarket! I think it might have been the lighting but he'd be happy and sweet, walk into the supermarket and he'd be beside himself!

That said though, I remember for no reason at all, walking back from the library with DD and she started wailing and flailing as soon as we walked out the door. Absolutely nothing worked. That half mile walk home is etched into my memory forever...

I had 2 under 2 as well. Once tried to go Christmas shopping with them both in the double buggy - I laugh now but it really wasn’t funny at the time, especially as they both pooed and needed a nappy change before we even made it into the shop!

On another occasion DD2 had a proper, rolling around on the floor tantrum near the till and got her welly stuck under someone else’s trolley.

Then there was the time we did all the shopping, got out, everyone in the car and DD1 told me her teddy was sitting on a shelf in the shop and could we go back and get him before we went home? Couldn’t remember which shelf she’d left him on so we had to search the supermarket, which the DDs actually found really fun.

All this was many years ago but I still always try to say something nice if I see a parent with a screaming child.

I remember a friend who was a health visitor in sobs of humiliation after a particular supermarket visit. It happens to everyone. And toddlers can be nightmarish if they wake up prematurely. The best thing is to forget it. There is no need for embarrassment.

We’ve all been there. I once had to rugby tackle my toddler and carry him out of Tesco under my arm like I was carrying a roll of carpet whilst he screamed his lungs out!!!
I was crying with rage and embarrassment as well.

As for the ‘kind hands’ bollocks… I gave up and ended up being a lot more assertive with my kids. It made me cringe seeing other mums trying it as well.
A short, sharp ‘No!’ worked a treat.

My kids are ace now and happily help with shopping etc.

it will be ok. Hang in there x

I remember abandoning my (nearly) full trolley in the supermarket PLENTY of times.

I remember chasing kids round supermarkets and diving in and under clothes rails whilst shopping and both of us ending up on the floor!

I remember wanting to just never take the kids out again!

We've all been there, don't worry. It will pass!

That woman was ridiculous.

I feel for you, OP. My DB was such a little shit in shops that for over a year, my DM could only shop on a Saturday when DF was home to look after him.

There was no internet or late night shopping in the 60s, she didn't drive and had to lug it all back on the bus.

Don't take any notice of the disapproving tutters, they've obviously no idea how vexing and irrational toddlers can be.