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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To cut off sister or not?

29 replies

kcchiefette · 02/05/2024 21:04

I recently went on a trip away with my mum and 3 sisters and it was a disaster.

My sisters are 26, 21 and 17 but I have always struggled to build a relationship with my 26 year old sister due to her behaviour and how she acts.

In the past she has accused my mum of child abuse (completely made up), made her life hell and is now committing benefit fraud along with her long term partner. She has two kids. (They live together but havent declared it)

She constantly needs to be the centre of attention. Her life is always difficult. Between herself and her partner, they make more than me as a single parent but she will order designer clothing etc and take money from our grandfather every month (around £200 a month)

She is one of those types who will put others and their parenting styles down yet will play victim when its spoken back to her.

She spent the entire 4 day holiday antagonizing everyone, pushing their buttons for a reaction etc.

I finally snapped when she commented on my parenting techniques with my ASD son and told her to stop commenting on others parenting skills and techniques as they will be different.

She completely dismissed this, called me a bitch and told.me to get lost.

Nobody can say a word to her without her cracking up.

ATM I support her out of my own time by picking up her child from school on my lunch breaks and bringing her home despite her partner being at home.

AIBU to say I no longer want to do this?

I get nothing but slagged off, it isnt appreciated etc but I also love my niece and dont want to sever our relationship.

WWYD?

Suck it up?

Or stick up for yourself?

OP posts:
Groovee · 02/05/2024 21:20

You'd be well within your rights to say no to the pick up. Do they do anything for you?

kcchiefette · 02/05/2024 21:17

speakball · 02/05/2024 21:13

Bottom line is call you a bitch is verbal abuse and it harms everyone who hears her talk like that. Being spoken to like that will make you unwell. Have you asked her to apologise? What would happen if you did. You are not expected to tolerate harm from anyone or for anyone. That has to be your bottom line.

I got no back up from any of the other 5 people on the holiday.

I have no pick ups until next Friday so O was going to say that I no longer can due to work commitments.

I am on the brink of telling her that I no longer can do that. I sacrifice my lunch break that day and have to work additional hours because I also need to do my own pick ups. I only did this to be kind as her partner apparently can't pick his lunch times and she is on a course.

OP posts:
speakball · 02/05/2024 21:13

Bottom line is call you a bitch is verbal abuse and it harms everyone who hears her talk like that. Being spoken to like that will make you unwell. Have you asked her to apologise? What would happen if you did. You are not expected to tolerate harm from anyone or for anyone. That has to be your bottom line.

Littlefish · 02/05/2024 21:12

Stop being a pushover.

If her partner is at home, he can pick up the child.

Be prepared for the shit to hit the fan though!