Being upset my husband went to the gym while I'm pregnant and dealing with flu

No I don't mind. It'll be nice for dd to see where daddy goes. I'm off for a soak in the bath and an early night. I'll leave her pyjamas on her bed. Don't forget to help her clean her teeth.

Do not cook any extra anything for him. Anyone can do a ham & cheese toastie.

You need to look after yourself. Your prince of a husband won't.

Husband isn't very domesticated, he can't cook, gets annoyed with our child easily and puts my struggling down to hormones and my feeling

Wtf did you decide to have another dc with him?? What made you think this would be a good idea? He sounds awful

If he pisses in the toilet, of course he should take a turn at cleaning it; why on earth would it be solely your responsibility?

I genuinely don't understand.

Two adults are sharing a property, neither has disabilities, both use the bathroom, both should be cleaning it.

Does he believe cleaning is beneath him?

Are you his servant?

The man is an idiot.

How do you find this man sexually attractive enough to get pregnant twice?

He sounds extremely unattractive. Is he able to do anything for himself?

Having another adult around should ease the workload, if it adds to it then he is not pulling his weight. Sounds like it would be a lot easier if he just fucked off.

i take it this is established behaviour? He’s always been like this? And you’re pregnant again….

So the fuck what? Let him starve and let him either do his own laundry or wear dirty clothes. It's not your problem.

The change has to come from you. Just stop and let him whine.

You work ONE less day than him. You're pregnant and ill. He needs to get off his arse and do his own washing and your child's (and preferably some of yours). Cooking protein for his fancy pants target is ridiculous. He wants protein he can open a tin of tuna can't he?

I'm so sorry but just reading it has made me soooo angry.

Gosh you need to stop enabling him OP and you need to start asserting your needs. “I’m sick, exhausted, and at breaking point. No you can’t go to the gym as you need to cook for me and look after DC” and then go back to bed.

What? He can't stick some chicken breasts in the oven?

Why are you falling for thos crap and making him food ?

Tell him to get his act together, you're slogging along like a packhorse while he sits on his lazy arse watching YouTube or swanning round the gym! Who the fuck does he think he is!

How embarrassing for him. He’s your 2nd child! Honestly this won’t change if you keep mothering him and rescuing him from the pain of having to be an adult.

He doesn’t think laundry is his issue? Well he’ll change his tune when he runs out of pants and clean uniform. How does he think all the clothes, sheets and towels get clean and dry? Magic? What a pathetic man.

This has got to be a comedy skit! Sorry but you're entitling him and it won't improve. He's a complete tosser.

I had SPD with both my pregnancies, it's horrible and you should be resting as much as you can especially if you're on your feet at work.
You're supposed to be in a partnership so yes DH is being unreasonable, he should be home looking after you and 6 year old!

This.

I have a non-cooking DH. This doesn't especially bother me as I like cooking and he does other jobs.

But when left alone he doesn't starve. He proves capable of googling stuff like 'how do I cook broccoli?' I might not want to eat any of his meals but he is capable of doing it.

He needs to grow up and sort his shit out.

It has never been easier to access basic recipes and videos of techniques. If he follows the instructions he can cook. He just doesn't want to.

I don't understand why you told him it was OK for him to go to the gym. If he really couldn't understand why he should have been staying at home to do his share then surely you should have explained how you were feeling.
I don't understand why you should be feeling guilty because he doesn't seem able to cope with what are normal domestic tasks.
You are supposed to be a partnership.
Surely things aren't going to get any better until you raise your expectations of him. Otherwise he will continue to get away with allowing you to do the lion's share in the relationship. He is on to a good thing ATM.

Don't watch him then, take yourself off to bed and leave him to it.
If you say you can't cope but then actually do cope and soldier on, he's not going to think you are serious. You need to demonstrate that you are treating yourself seriously. You are not his paid help.

He is an adult, with no disabilities or reasons he can't do normal adult tasks, right? So why ON EARTH would you feel guilty about watching him do those tasks? There is nobody who 'can't cook'. He can start simple. It's not 'struggling', it's learning to do basic adult things, fgs!

And, like everyone else has said, you both need to stop thinking of it as him helping you. It's not helping. It's doing his bit to look after his house and his child.

You are 25 weeks pregnant, doing a 9hr shift with flu ?? Crikey you must have superpowers.

I ended up mowing the lawn at 8 months pregnant while (now ExH) sat on the garden bench smoking. Many years ago now. but it was an indication of his complete inability to empathise with another human being. I always hoped he'd change. He didn't.

Why are you having another child with him….?

Seen your update - put the guilt away!

He will only learn by trying. It may be painful for both you (who could do it in half the time) and him but he has to learn.

What made you choose to have a second child with this absolute man child?

Please don't have a third, he won't change. Leave.