Am I off my head to think I can work full time with a very young family???

Ditto. I was made to feel I wouldn’t have time to wash/clean teeth/drink a cup of water when my baby was here as they couldn’t be put down for a second, which really worried me. None of that was true, and my second child is somewhat of a ‘Velcro baby’.

I had four children and have worked full time throughout. All my friends worked full time.

I can’t believe anyone would have the nerve to suggest you should be part time. I hope they wrote that down so that you can discuss it with HR!!

Totally inappropriate!!! I would report her.

I'd be sceptical the head wasn't trying to replace Op with a cheaper teacher given she said she's on a good wage. If she drops to part time then they can either save the cost or fill the other part with a cheaper teacher.

I can’t believe there are so many judgemental people out there willing to opine on other people’s choices, it’s rude (unless asked for an opinion). I wouldn’t dream of commenting on other people’s choices. For what it’s worth I worked full time in an office when I had three under three and still do. It was hard when they were very young . One advantage though was AVOIDING the twice daily school run! 😂

I don’t understand what’s so special about the school run. Personally I hate it.

I would rather have all school holidays off. Sounds like you have a good support network Op.

Absolutely this! Not a teacher but I've worked throughout and my DSs are now 16, 14 & 12. Hard but do-able with a partner who pulls their weight & sounds like you've good support around you too.

YANBU. I work full time hours compressed into 3.5 days. My husband does the same and our toddler twins go to childcare 2 days a week. It’s doable but tiring and requires planning. I’m not sure why everyone (l write everyone but most of the time it’s women!) have to be so judgemental. Also 13 weeks off will be great when they go to school -both for the lack of childcare and the quality time.

Most mums who are happy working FT aren’t going to be starting threads about it.

Everyone is different. I’m glad I went with what I felt was right and dismissed what others were saying because 99% of things they said I would feel or would happen wasn’t the case for me at all.

Everyone is different. Different energy levels, family support levels, childcare provision etc. So u know what u can and can't do.
I have low energy and absolutely cudnt do it. But that's me.
Absolutely DO NOT let a vampire HT decide for you or pressurise you. And do not feel obliged to go above and beyond.
If you can do both, great. If not go part time.
Just try it. If it's too much, you can go part time later. Have a good and if you don't like it change it. But at least you will know one way or the other.
I'm a teacher. It's an energy and time sapping job. Don't be hurt by friends saying go part time because they probably just trying to protect u..

I did it, needs must. One child is a chartered engineer in a specialist field and the other is a Dr. It’s hard.. but it’s always hard no matter what the circumstances you raise your children. Just do it.

Surely that conversation was discriminatory, if nor illegal? Please report to your union! I worked full time with childcare and the odd bit of GP help when they were too sick for nursery but well enough to be out of bed. I'm jealous of teachers holidays! Please report those comments... outrageous

That’s your choice. It is fair to say it is hard - I worked full time with 4 young children, that was my choice and I loved my work. I didn’t have family around so good child care and emergency back up was essential and my husband and I worked as a partnership. Ironically I worked less when my kids were teenagers so I could support them with GCSEs and A levels. I currently work full time now.

It's not always necessarily a case of "ignore everyone, they're just being judgy". They might be speaking from experience. The amount of threads I see on MN from mums working full time with young children, who are completely burnt out and miserable, even with lots of family support, makes me wonder if the naysayers may actually be right. Maybe it really is crazy to that two parents working FT with young children is the norm, maybe everyone would be happier if at least one parent worked part time. So I wouldn't be entirely dismissive of what everyone is saying.

An older generation of teacher here but thinking of women who had children about the time I had mine 90s-2000s, everyone worked full time. To be fair I knew ono-one with more than two children.

That HT is a piece of work and is probably pissed off that you're not available to do unpaid work such as breakfast clubs, etc.

I can't believe your Head said that to you!

I'm a teacher on maternity and due to go back in the summer with a 3 year old and 9 month old. No one has said anything to me! I know it can be tough sometimes but I try to see it that I get 13 weeks off with my kids and with the extra money I've got from working full time we can do nice things etc.

You need to find a more supportive school. Your headteacher sounds awful! They are out there!!

It sounds like you have a good balance and you will always have the holidays with your kids which is more than lots of people. I teach part time and its great but also has ruined my career progression and I still feel judged sometimes for only being part time! You can't win!

Hi @watermelonfizz

I think the difference with teaching than other jobs is the sheer all consuming nature of it during term time.

I tried to go back full time when dc were small but it was too much even with the holidays.

I’m a teacher and on SLT. I have three kids. It’s totally doable. Husband also works full time. After school club and breakfast clubs during the week when they get to school age and then all the holidays with them.

it’s fine. Get a cleaner. And a gardener if you need it. Outsource the house stuff you don’t want to do.
You are building a career as a woman after children. You are an excellent role model.

I actually can't believe that these sorts of conversations are happening in this day and age. And like you say, it's very unlikely men would have to have the same conversation!

I know lots of teachers who work full time with 2 children! And not only teachers, but those in other professions. I would have thought this was the norm if I'm honest! Especially with the current financial climate!

I have 1 toddler and would like another baby in the near future and fully plan on returning to work full time (as a teacher unless I find another job by then...but I'm looking to leave for different reasons!)

You've already been working (and pregnant!) with a small child. You'll be absolutely fine with two. The worst part for me was having double the number of sick days with the kids - I used up my dependents days very quickly.

I'm a teacher and I went back 4 days after DC1. I just ended up cramming 5 days of work into 4 whilst losing a fifth of my salary for it. So after DC2 I went back full time.

• Things that have helped:
• A lot of GP support
• Getting a cleaner
• DH is able to be flexible with work and do school drop offs
• Being really strict about not taking work home with me.

I realise this wouldn't work for everyone.

I'm surprised you've got 2 children and only just discovered that everyone and their dog simply must have an opinion on everything to do with your child-related choices. Ignore. Of course you can work ft with young children, many, many people do.

This sounds like a lovely setup op. Suspect people are just jel you have the grandparent support to make it work.

I got judged for working 3 and half days, term time only! Plus my child went to pre school so only did 9-3!! Apparently that was 'throwing him in at the Deep end' 🤦 you will get judged no matter what you do, you do what works for you