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Original poster

Husbands search history

40 replies

schoolie258 · 30/04/2024 08:21

It's a bit funny but not really. Husband hasn't said anything to me at all so there's definitely a lack of communication on his side aswell as mine I suppose.

I used the iPad we have (it's communal and we both use it) this morning I went to use it and noticed the last thing searched on google was "why does my wife talk so much" 😂 he then went onto a Reddit forum about a wife over talking and trapping this man in never ending 'conversations'

Did he purposely leave the history available to give me a hint? lol

Am I supposed to be seen and not heard? I can't really improve things if I don't know what the issue is. This morning we were talking about saving for a mortgage which was a 2 way conversation as far as I'm aware. How do I bring this up? Or do I just try to be more aware of when he's tired and doesn't want me to speak to him ?

OP posts:
Damnloginpopup · 30/04/2024 10:07

schoolie258 · 30/04/2024 08:21

It's a bit funny but not really. Husband hasn't said anything to me at all so there's definitely a lack of communication on his side aswell as mine I suppose.

I used the iPad we have (it's communal and we both use it) this morning I went to use it and noticed the last thing searched on google was "why does my wife talk so much" 😂 he then went onto a Reddit forum about a wife over talking and trapping this man in never ending 'conversations'

Did he purposely leave the history available to give me a hint? lol

Am I supposed to be seen and not heard? I can't really improve things if I don't know what the issue is. This morning we were talking about saving for a mortgage which was a 2 way conversation as far as I'm aware. How do I bring this up? Or do I just try to be more aware of when he's tired and doesn't want me to speak to him ?

TL:DR 😁

Allfur · 30/04/2024 10:07

What a twat

focacciamuffin · 30/04/2024 10:07

Chillilounger · 30/04/2024 10:03

I wouldn't read too much into it. I search for all sorts of random stuff. I am not trying to leave coded messages.

I was thinking the same thing.

Chillilounger · 30/04/2024 10:03

I wouldn't read too much into it. I search for all sorts of random stuff. I am not trying to leave coded messages.

Mudflaps · 30/04/2024 10:01

I think I'd have to search 'why doesn't my husband talk more' or 'why is all conversation left to me' and leave it for him to find.

ForLovingGreenDog · 30/04/2024 09:54

The search came up automatically, so you can quite easily ask about it without illustrating that you were prying, or demonstrating a lack of trust. So, I would ask does he feel you talk to much? If so, ask for examples, and whether it bothers him a lot. It's important to both realise that each of us can do things that irritate our SO, as well as remembering that we have the right to be who we are and do whatever we choose (aside from abusing someone or deliberately hurting them). I'd say if it's niggling at you, it's important that you and he talk about it, so you can identify what his thoughts are. However, if he DID find your in depth talking annoying, that doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Also, if that is one of searches, he may simply be trying to better understand you as a person. The key is talking about it, I'd say.

C1N1C · 30/04/2024 09:40

If you're talking about serious stuff and this is a passive aggressive way of silencing you, ok, not good... If you're 'known' to just talk and talk (my MIL is like this!) just for the sake of conversation, because you like the sound of your own voice, or because you just like to gossip etc, and you know this is you, then yes, I wouldn't even bring it up, but use it as a motivation for self-reflection/improvement.

Original poster
schoolie258 · 30/04/2024 09:34

@Steamboats - haha at least it's not just me! Glad someone else does the same. I'm on maternity leave at the moment so I'm probably talking at him a bit more than usual as I have a lack of adult conversation. Yes I suppose he is a bit of a peacemaker. He's relatively quiet which is why I probably feel the need to carry the conversation otherwise I think we'd just be sitting in silence which is nice sometimes but not all the time

@MILhere Yea it's shared. Thats why I'm not sure if he meant to delete it maybe? Or if he's left it there on purpose as a way of giving me a hint without having to actually speak to me about it

OP posts:
MILhere · 30/04/2024 08:54

If it's a shared iPad, you just say 'I saw you searched x' and either make a joke or ask to talk about it.

Are your sure the iPad is shared, because you'd expect that you can look at the r search history if it is.

SwordToFlamethrower · 30/04/2024 08:53

I read posts on this forum about men cheating, means nothing. Talk to your husband.

Steamboats · 30/04/2024 08:50

I can actually relate to what you said in your update! I tend to bang on sometimes and actually bore myself!
If he won't actually come out and say how he feels when you ask him it does make things more difficult to have a discussion about it. Is he the same over other subjects? Does he generally avoid saying what he really thinks to avoid hurting feelings or confrontation?

BiIIIie · 30/04/2024 08:36

I never understand when people say "how do I bring this up". Surely as husband and wife you can both chat about anything without having to ask the Internet how to bring it up though?

Whatsitcalled38 · 30/04/2024 08:36

We all do things that annoy people. It's clearly something you're aware of. Some people monologue for so long and force people into conversations without noticing the other person isn't interested in the conversation topic. It is something you should try to be more mindful of, just becuase he married you doesn't mean he has to be your sounding board. It's kinda sweet he's actually trying to understand WHY 🤣

Original poster
schoolie258 · 30/04/2024 08:32

@Steamboats I have felt sometimes I talk too much or I'll be on a rant about something and I've ended up boring myself and I've said to him "I talk too much don't I?" And he always disagrees. So i have asked him before but he clearly just says the opposite of how he really feels

OP posts:
Steamboats · 30/04/2024 08:26

I don't understand why you can't just tell him you noticed this in his search history and ASK him if he feels you talk too much. Have a conversation about how you both communicate.