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AIBU?

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When someone dies.....

105 replies

Curlygirl06 · 29/04/2024 21:42

Posting here for traffic.

We recently had a death in the wider family, and trying to sort the admin stuff out has been problematic. There were half filled out insurance policy forms, bank account applications etc, and with a lot of stuff now being online it's difficult to sort out what's what and what's not. Didn't help that they were hoarders and their filing system was a bit erratic.

My filing system is pretty good-I could lay my hands on most stuff immediately (well, I will after I've put away the latest pile of paperwork!) but so much stuff is on my phone and laptop, with passwords and security codes stored by them that it would be difficult to get to it all.
Thinking of the future, I've started making a list of EVERYTHING. Bank accounts, pension details, insurance policies, passport numbers, addresses, phone numbers, you name it, I'm listing it, so that when the time comes my adult children won't have to spend hours looking for stuff, it'll all be in one place. When they need the actual paper version of it, it'll be in the relevant files (hopefully!)

Not everyone will want to do this, or have the time to do it but if you can, please do. The wasted hours that are going into hunting for things that may or may not exist is very frustrating. Thank you.

OP posts:
Pleatherandlace · 29/04/2024 21:49

I did this before having major surgery this year. Got everything into an envelope (and planned my funeral). I really don’t think it’s fair to leave people with a mess to sort out when they’re already dealing with grief.

CarInsurance · 29/04/2024 21:49

There's also the issue of banks needing to be told they have died. I heard on Woman's Hour about a service that will do a few, not all, rather than having people calling asking for the deceased. Tell Us Once is the DWP official one but there's also https://www.deathnotificationservice.co.uk/ I remember the endless calls chasing missed payments being pretty hard on me when DM died.

The Death Notification Service

https://www.deathnotificationservice.co.uk

Maddy70 · 29/04/2024 21:49

My DH almost dued a few weeks ago and the stress of not knowing hiw to access certain things made a difficult situation far more stressful.

Thankfully he's recovering and this is this weeks job

Newname71 · 29/04/2024 21:47

Such a good idea! If I died DH would have no clue who our mortgage is with ditto life and house insurance or even who we get our gas/electricity from!
When DF passed away DSis and I spent hours going through bank statements. DM didn’t have a clue what came in and what went out. They had 27 direct debits going out!! DF had never shopped around for home insurance or broadband. They were paying an astronomical amount out!
Then hours on the phone negotiating with all the payees.

gamerchick · 29/04/2024 21:47

It's a good idea. Me and husband have an envelope with our stuff, given we have separate finances.

Tell us once is available online to notify a bunch of agencies also.

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