Do boys stay in touch as adults?

I'm sure she'd know 🙄

Are you sure they would not have any reason not to contact you?

One adult son. I see him, his wife and our granddaughter a few times a week. he usually pops in after the gym on his way home. They come as a family for Sunday lunch a couple of times a month. We have grandaughter to sleep weekly. We all get on well and live very close to each other. I know I'm lucky.

Gosh, that would break my heart. Having a row/falling out and cutting contact is one thing, but slowly drifting away with no explanation - that must be hard.

My youngest DS23 has vanished. Not heard or seen him in over 3yrs. No idea where he is. He's cut off all of the family, one by one. We don't know why but suspect his older GF is behind it.

DS25 is hopeless at keeping in regular touch, but always remembers mothers day, birthdays, etc. DIL is probably behind a lot of our contact. It's not malicious, he's just in his own world!

Very similar to another post today! My DC are still young, but me and my DS (and our respective children) are a lot more in touch with our parents than DB is. However DP is also very close to his parents. In all honesty DB can be somewhat lazy (imo) and relies on his DP to organise his whole life for him, which I believe is why they inevitably see her family more.

If you want to increase the chance of seeing your DSs more when they are older then I’d definitely recommend modelling to them that men are equally as responsible for ‘life admin’ and childcare as women. Obviously there are many reasons why families may or may not be close, many of which will be out of your control.

My brother still lives at home in his mid fifties....so be careful what you wish for!LOL

I agree.
Mine (mid 30s) is pretty good, I was very distant with my 'rents🤷🏻‍♀

We see our adult DSs more than our adult DDs.

Awww, that's sad. I wish they'd phone you more. X

My son is a toddler. It makes me sad when I hear people say adult sons don't stay in touch 💔

My husband gives me hope, though - he rings his mum for a quick 10 minute chat every single day.

She's probably the nicest person I've ever met, so I can't blame him really

I see my mum weekly (female) and ring her too. My brother sees my parents maybe once a month or once every 6 weeks ish. I definitely know a lot more about my parents lives than my brother does, as if we all meet up I find my mum telling my brother stories that I’ve already heard and are “old news” to me.

My husband barely sees his parents. They come down to their second home once a month and we’ll see them then for coffee but it’s always brief and never anything more than coffee. Never ever rings them and has a chat or catch up like I do with my parents.

Not saying yours sons will be like this though. Just the two examples I have.

My friend has two girls in her 20s. Last week they came home for the first time in months. Every time she’d gone to see them they were out. She was never all about seeing them all the time but she was saying once every few months when they live within an hour and a half is crazy.

dh would see mil at least once a week, we both speak to our mums daily!

Dh speaks to his mum at least once or twice a week, if not more. More than I speak to my parents tbh.
We see his mum (his dad died 4 years ago) as often as we see my parents.
His brother is the same.

DH didn't see his mum much before we were together, not for any team reason he was just slack about it, she's lovely and I told him I thought it was awful he didn't make much of an effort. He speaks to her all the time these days, we visit both ways regularly (90 minutes away so not every week) and she has a very active role in DS' life. Not all DILs are the gatekeeper!! We don't agree on everything but we don't need to, I respect her, love her, she raised the man I chose to marry she can't be bad 😁

My brother pops in to see our mum once a month or so. Doesn't bother phoning or messaging in between really

I don't have an adult son, but my partner sees his mum regularly. Also when I was younger, my dad used to take us to see our grandparents every Sunday morning.

I agree with this. But that still vindicates the idea that ‘a son’s a son… etc’

I’ve personally seen many, many mothers of sons totally at the mercy of their DIL’s generosity and Emotional Intelligence (or not) over the years. There usually isn’t the same level of ‘gatekeeping’ in relationships with adult daughters.

I spoke to my dad by phone every day from the time I first got a job at until he died when I was 24...sometimes we had nothing to say just said hi. The only days I missed were when I was abroad in holiday (he died in 1993)

I was living at home until I was 22😂. Yes we stay in touch

I see my adult son once a week on average- but he does live quite near. We swap Wordles every morning, and we have an active family Whatsapp. Just checked- we've had 4 text chats today-but he is having some hassle at work that I am helping him with- that's not a normal day.

Until my mam passed away last year we saw each other most days and she would message pretty often anyways. She moved 300 miles away for a while but we still kept in touch, went to visit and had days out.

Couldn't have imagined it any other way.

In my experience if your kids don't stay in touch 9/10 times it's because of the childhood they had and now they want distance.
Do your best for them, fill their cup and they'll fill yours and more.

I think it comes down to parenting and personality rather than gender if I'm honest. If you foster a good relationship with a child then it will likely continue into adulthood. That being said personality and shared interests also play a part. My brothers spend at lot more time with both my parents as they have a shared love of sports.

I think these sorts of threads are prone to bias as more often than not, people who have sons who do keep in touch will comment. I have 2 girls and tbh I don’t think it matters whether you have boys or girls, I think it all comes down to personalities.

My brother was super close with us, his family of origin, until he got married, and then pretty much totally dropped us. We see him and his family maybe 2 or 3 times a year but it's gone from messaging nearly every day to just a quick text on birthdays and Christmas. It makes me really sad.