Jobs worth nursery??

This sounds a bit like
'computer says no' rather than them being nasty although I do understand your frustration at the lack of flexibility. They have their procedures and it can all be quite robotic in the sense they have set rules and they stick to them. I don't agree with the lack of flexibility in the education system in general, especially the formulaic way of teaching with teachers not having the freedom to teach in their own way with their own ideas but that's another topic. I'd accept it and let it drop. It's the system to blame not the teachers.

The activities are for children leaving nursery for school, not leaving nursery to go to another nursery, so your DS isn't part of the group who they're aimed at so naturally he won't be included. Such is the way with anything that's aimed at a group of people to which you don't belong.

For school your child won't be able to participate in lots of things because they aren't for him. Other year groups will have trips, parties, plays etc that AREN'T for him. Your attitude that he should be included in things that AREN'T for his age group or whatever is not going to wash and will not help him. They are celebrating the kids moving to school, he isn't so it is RIGHT he isn't included!

Ours did a leavers for preschool and play school! Some going to school or school nursery (basically anyone leaving that summer)

He’s not going to school tho he’s going to another nursery! I work in a preschool and we have leavers graduation, 2 of the children who are staying are september bdays but they won’t be taking part because they aren’t going to school, yea they will miss their friends who are but they will adapt and it’s life. I think it’s a mistake to make out he is going to school when he isn’t, he will be very confused next year when they start school readiness etc

Lol its a leavers assembly for the children leaving the nursery setting and attending school, not a leavers assembly because you've chosen to move him to a different nursery/pre school!

"My one request..." lol.

I get that you're a first time parent but this is all very PFB and a bit over the top. We were all first time parents once, it doesn't really get you a pass?

I work in a nursery and we would have definitely had the same response as your setting have had… he’s not going to school he’s moving nurseries.

I'm not sure what you're missing? I thought all sensible adults would understand it but it keeps coming up so perhaps not.

It's a little ceremony to mark the end of the nursery years before they go to school. Our daycare doesn't do it but our nursery school does - the children sing a few songs and tell us a little bit about their year there. It's maybe half an hour and very sweet. Afterwards the parents stayed and the children played with each other and showed us around - that was particularly special our year as it was a covid cohort and so parents hadn't really been in the school after the first day.

They do wear the caps and gowns which personally I could do without but obviously the children love dressing up and so it's just a nice, fun little touch. A couple of weeks after DC's nursery graduation I was at a real deal university graduation at work and she was so excited to see a photo of me in my cap and gown and it actually opened a really nice discussion about the different stages of education and how she was moving on to a new stage at primary school.

Of course, there's always the chance you're being wilfully disingenuous and just wanted to be sure we all know that you know the children haven't actually achieved a formal qualification at the age of 4. But of course I'm sure no one on MN would behave like that.

I wanted to move my PFB to the preschool year of a school when she was a year too young. Unsurprisingly they said no! She is October born, but that didn’t mean she could go into preschool with her August born pals. It was just life.

Also this

This really. He’s in the year group below. He’ll be going to school in Sept 2025. There’s not much more to it!

and this is not a graduation, just a leavers party.

It might be "just a leavers party", but it's a leavers party for the children who are leaving to start school. The OP's child isn't a part of it, because he's not starting school. 🤷🏻‍♀️

But....hes not going to school hes moving to a new nursery 🙈

I’m in the same boat, OP.

My daughter is old for her year group and we’re moving her from a day nursery to the preschool attached to the school that she’ll attend.

We’re calling it “preschool” and have explained that she won’t be in the same class as her nursery friends who are moving over for Reception.

She won’t be part of her nursery’s leavers photo/ picnic etc. I do have a bit of sadness about it but it’s not for her, and if she turns out to mind we’ll comfort her.

We will mark her leaving with nice cards and gifts for the staff, she can choose somewhere special for dinner, maybe a small gift for her too.

Neither was my daughter, we just decided to move her early (and the nursery kindly included her of their own choice) and this is not a graduation, just a leavers party.

Why exactly do nursery kids graduate? I realise i'm missing ops point but the whole thing makes zero sense to me.

He’s not going into reception he is just changing nursery by choice - he shouldn’t be included

This is what I'd be worried about too. Also I don't think nursery will budge on this. Sadly once they are in these settings you have to pick and chose your battles.

No I think you are? It’s a silly rule, a child is leaving to go to a ‘school setting’. When my daughter started at the school nursery she had a uniform and rules to follow that all the reception children follow.

I had similar with my DD. She was a september baby and her nursery "class" was all the school year above plus one other 3 yo. The end of nursery thing was a sports day which they had to practise lots for and was made a big deal by the staff, a note put on the window then eventually an email to me and another mum saying our kids couldn't come. dd was very aware as it was practised for (and was literally running around in the park and a parent had to accompany them so no ratios etc).

After pressing them for a reason why she, as a leaver couldn't come they gave in

I think it's pretty stingy of them, op.

Youre not in NE Scotland are you because this is exactly the kind of thing the nursery we use for our children are like.

It is ridiculous though. Ours didn't call it graduation though, just the leavers' picnic thank goodness. I couldn't have brought myself to call it graduation and when they actually put them on little gowns and caps it's beyond cringe.

I like many others think it’s mistake to call the new nursery school…maybe preschool? If it is one.

Still I totally agree with you that current nursery are very mean and jobs worth not to find a way to include him. Sure they could have done something esp when it’s a child’s feelings and you’ve paid them a bloody fortune over the years.

My main off topic reaction though is OMG a nursery graduation! 🤦🏼‍♀️
What next, a prom? Just dilutes the meaning of things and creates a lot of self regarding faff.

IMHO 😂

I definitely see your point of why not include him, what’s the harm and do agree it would be nice. But I can also see why they don’t want to - if they make an exception for him then others may also want it and then it takes away from the whole purpose of the event.