Jobs worth nursery??

Glad you got time to sort out the school wording for your son. It be awful for him to loose that next year. Don't understand why you upset still re the graduation. He is not going to school and to include him would make it mean less for him next year. It is like getting a year 5 child going to the year 6 prom.

And they won’t let your child watch? He’s not allowed to learn and sing the songs?

But surely the leavers ceremony is only held for children leaving to go to school. Not children who are leaving for any other reason or any other point in the year?

It's good you will start to reframe it for him.

But I don't know why you think it's not inclusive? Being inclusive doesn't mean everyone needs to get to do everything they want. If someone was just moving house so needed to change nurseries and the child was 2 years younger should they get to go to a leavers graduation?

Should someone moving high schools in year 10 get to go to the year 11 prom before they go?

It's not about not being inclusive. He's not at that stage yet. If everyone got to go to everything it wouldn't be special for those it's intended for anymore.

the whole nursery leaver ‘graduation’ thing is still grating on me. It doesn’t feel very inclusive, but again I hear you.

But why does it grate on you?

I genuinely can’t understand why you think your son has a right to be involved in activities that aren’t relevant to him?

I wouldn't say to the nursery that they're not being inclusive or use the word discrimination. It makes it sound like he's being treated differently due to being in a minority group, rather than just being in a different year.

the whole nursery leaver ‘graduation’ thing is still grating on me. It doesn’t feel very inclusive,

In what way isn't it inclusive?

All children who are leaving to start school are included in the leavers events.

Your child isn't going to school, so he isn't part of the leavers celebrations. But neither are the 2 year olds, or babies. 🤷🏻‍♀️

You need to get real and not tell him he is going to school.
You also need to act like it is reasonable for him to have his leavers next year. He takes his lead from you.
Can he watch his friends and wish them well at school?

It's not discrimination for schools and nurseries to do different things with different year groups.
Won't your son be confused if you tell him he's starting school with his friends and then they're not with him in the new nursery?

Ah it is a shame though

Our nursery did 2 events one for reception leavers one for those going to school nursery - but there was a lot of each at ours! I'd think they'd just let him join in but I also wouldn't make a fuss on it

That's not what is happening

A year 5 play or a year 6 one? Did you leave in year 5 but ask to be in the year 6 play because your new school didn't do that in year 6? That would be the comparable situation to OP and would be just as unreasonable

Or if it was a year 5 one and you moved between years as you say then you would have still been there for end of year 5 so not missing anything there either.

In fairness to OP, it's so emotional when your DC moves on from the nursery you first brought them to as a baby. If he's leaving at the same time as friends who are going to school and they're getting more fuss than him I understand her losing sight of the difference in the circumstances.

Don't tell him he is going to school it will cause a lot of confusion next year when preparing for going to school. Or he will catch on quickly that you lied previously.

Call it the school nursery, preschool or nursery school if you like as that is the truth.

There will be leavers activites at school nursery next year so he isnt missing out.

It hurts doesn't it OP.
I remember moving schools between years 5 and 6, and obviously had to give a term's notice. I was totally excluded from the summer play (and music/drama was my life). I am in my 30s now and still remember it.

Why on earth are you telling him he's going to school when he isn't?

The nursery are doing absolutely nothing wrong, but you really are.

As someone with a child actually going to real school in September, I think YABU because you’re making the whole thing about your child who if they were staying at nursery would never have been involved anyway!!! Your whole post smacks of self importance to be honest. Don’t be a twat and start a war via email and taint the rest of your child’s time at their current nursery.

Also “discriminatory” - LOL

He's not in the correct year group. If they do it for you then they would have to make it available for any other children leaving before they start school. Which would probably make it impossible to offer in the first place.

Your seeing it as just one extra child but what your asking is for them to do something for you that they can't offer to everyone else.

Nothing wrong with asking but you are unreasonable to be put out by this

When my dd finished pre school last year they had a ridiculous graduation ceremony, professional leaving photos, they had to say what they had loved about pre school and what they were looking forward to about school, they sang songs about starting school etc. it would be weird to do that if your child isn't starting school, wouldn't it? I can see why the nursery is saying that and really don't think your child will mind, he will get his chance next year.

But she isn’t just casually referring to it as school; she’s actively telling her son that he’s starting school which is different. Also, taking him out of his current setting because (which is what it sounds like) his friends are going to that school this year, which will confuse him as to why he’s not seeing them and may not even get into that school anyway.

It’s very common for parents to refer to a formal nursery school, as school- I’ve come across it dozens of times! On that, you are NBU.

But from what people are saying you want him put with the children who are a year older, as they’re leaving for reception straight from the current nursery. That’s just a bit weird, why would you set him up for that? It’s nothing to do with him.

Why are you telling him he’s going to school if he’s not? I made a decision to give my ds the ‘advantage year’ (in Scotland) quite late in the year so he automatically went back a year at nursery and saw all his year group do the leavers activities and awards while he didn’t and he wasn’t particularly bothered by it because he knew he wasn’t going to school!

Oh god OP you’re absolutely ridiculous. The entire universe doesn’t revolve around you and your kid, I’m amazed you thought it did tbh but I guess there is always one eh?!