To wonder why these women don’t speak to me?

I like this re the three types of friendships: “friend for a reason, friend for a season, friend for a lifetime”. Some people develop from reason/season to lifetime but they are few.

I'm sorry you're hurt, OP.

PPs above have it right. Most workplace relationships are temporary; only in rare cases have I encountered the exception in which I've made a true friend at work.

But 'situational' friendships are the norm. It's for precisely this reason that statements such as this: they call me their work daughter/say they’re my mum would make me deeply uncomfortable.

Our work place is like this when someone moves teams. They might only be 4 foot away but it may as well be 100 miles.
Don't take it personally

Do you reach out to them?

I've had relationships like that in every job I've had, rarely speak to any of them now- I dont think it's out of the ordinary as life moves on.

When you grow up and get a bit older and wiser you’ll realise this is completely normal. Work friendships are really intense when you’re spending 40 hours a week together. Once you’re spending zero hours a week together it is really easy to remember how little you actually had in common. Move on dear. This will happen repeatedly throughout your working life 🤷🏼‍♀️

I was talking of OP's situation, Ethno but the 'Work' relationship thing is cringey and a bit exclusive when it's over-peddled in front of others.

Genuine friendships don't need that moniker.

In my experience sadly this is what usually happens to work friendships. It's a shame.

I have 2 "work daughters". I have exactly the same dob of the mother if one of them. The other comes from a Turkish background (born here) and my name means Mum in Turkish. I'm very, very fond of both of them, but I imagine they're the 'seasonal friends' mentioned, especially as I intend to move away very shortly.

It's no disrespect to either of them, I really enjoy their company and as the only other child I have has 4 legs, a tail and is inclined to lick my face it's my way of "getting down with the kids" but I imagine my contact once I've moved will be social media. Its how work friendships happen. I've been working 40 years but have only remained in touch with a handful of ex colleagues.

I don’t think these relationships are ‘fakery’ at all. It’s really common to become close to colleagues, after all you spend more time with them than anyone else in your life and you share so many experiences together. Work friendships are not fake, but they are almost always ‘for a season’ unless you share other things such as children the same age, hobbies, live in the same neighbourhood etc.

It’s understandable that you are sad, but it’s no reflection on you (or them). It’s just the way things work out with most work friendships.

The work-daughter thing was really superficial, wasn't it? Not a real friendship, just a work one, however else they tried to sell it to you.

Real friendships don't need a prefix of Work-<insert bollocks reference>. They just are friendships.

Try not to be sad. See the fakery for what it was and realise that fluidity is something you'll encounter from time to time. They are no loss to you. Their puffery, whilst intense, will blow away.

I find the reference to Valentines Day a bit odd.

Did/do you have a crush on either of these women?

In all my years of working, I only have one “work friendship” survive me leaving the job (and I knew that person vaguely in a social capacity beforehand anyway). I find with most work friends, they are people I wouldn’t hang out with if I didn’t work with them. Not that they aren’t decent people, but it’s a friendship of convenience if that makes sense!

This is how some friendships go, but if they're on your social media you can maybe continue to have some contact with them, whilst lowering your expectations about how close or frequent this will be.
Is it possible that the friendships meant more to you than to the women themselves, so that they've moved on more easily? The mother/daughter thing sounds a bit intense, and I'm wondering if that feeling came more from your side than theirs.

This is very true.

And being "friends for a season" doesn't mean that the friendship wasn't real / good / meaningful. You just can't stay friends with everyone, so it's time to move on.

You might have heard the saying "Friends for a reason, friends for a season, friends for a lifetime" and friends you should've run away from ?

These women were your friends for a reason - they felt you needed mentoring or encouragement at work - and a season, the length of time you worked together. It's quite nice, really.

It's perfectly normal to feel sad about losing them as you've moved on. As we gain experience, I think we learn that people mostly come and go in our lives. Some turn this into a reason to avoid getting close to people, but usually we're able to appreciate whatever each friendship brings to us for as long as it lasts. Be glad to have known them, and don't forget to do the same for younger women in your future!

I had soo many very close work friends who I’d do a lot with in and out of work and when the part of our working life ended so did many of the close bonds. I still have these people on social media and at first we would try to arrange to meet up etc but eventually it fizzled out. I still think very highly of them all and appreciate the bond we shared and how happy they made my work life at that time ! But every one is super busy in life these days ! I find it hard to see my very close friends & family let alone others. I would try not to take it personally.

It's a shame but unfortunately does tend to happen with work friendships.

So sorry OP. Work friends can sadly be hugely fickle. Out of all the places I've worked, and the many people I've grown close to, only a few have lasted the distance over the years as I've moved with jobs. Despite me trying my best to keep things going. I do think people are just so much worse at staying in touch, organizing meet ups etc. Post pandemic we are all a lot more selfish but also preoccupied with the many challenges of life today.

I'd leave space now, you will only hurt yourself more if you keep trying to get a response. I know that as I've been there. You sound lovely and I really hope the next work friends you make are better ones.

You saw it as friend friends. They saw it as best work friends.

I have found that this sort of thing happens a lot with work colleagues unfortunately. I would say it’s mostly down to the fact they have different lives and interests outside of work and they have their own group of friends in their personal lives.

I admit that I have also been guilty of ‘forgetting’ about work colleagues due to the fact that I do not share common interests with them outside of work/ age differences/ different lifestyles and the ones who I did become friends with have either left their job and moved on and our friendships have fizzled out or that they have been happy to drop me for the ‘new girl’ as soon as we get a new starter so nowadays I just see colleagues as colleagues and keep them separate from my personal life.

I do have quite a few ex-colleagues who are friends (many more I was friendly with who aren't). In each case we had something in common outside of work - lived close, children the same ages, already did a leisure activity together before we became ex colleagues etc.

Otherwise your commonality is just work and people soon lose interest in hearing what's happening at their old workplace, especially if you don't meet naturally in the course of everyday life.

It's sad that people do drop out of your life over time but new ones come along too.

Like everyone else has said, this is just how some friendships go. I've felt very close to work friends before (went to each others weddings and stuff) but I think unless you saw them outside of the work place quite regularly, the friendship just isn't likely to stay. People are busy, life and different priorities take over. It's ok to feel upset but it really wouldn't be personal. I think finding friends through hobbies to be more long lasting.

That's a shame but I think it's quite common with work colleagues. I have been close with some over the years but the friendships fizzled out once no longer working together. Don't take it to heart. It's just life gets busy and we're all spinning plates, it's not surprising that we drop a few. I have trouble keeping up with even my few closest friends when life gets really busy, I'm still thinking about them and care 😊

Situationship vs real friendship. Horrible when you realise that what you thought was friendship was so one sided. I've had it too and it hurts every time