Was I rude to this lady?

Good point!!

@BIWI ?

It’s not ageist though. 🙄 OP described what happened

I get annoyed with posters with bees and their bonnet trying to derail threads.

lots of other things get on my nerves on here too but I won’t derail the thread.

Did you seriously just say that? After vehemently accusing OP of ageism throughout the entire thread? 😂😂😂

Are you trolling? Tell me you're trolling

My dad is bigger than your dad.

Bore off?! How old are you

@Screamingabdabz

broken bones

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣A small child's light backpack?? Do behave!!

@Patchymum

you should have apologised & reminded DD to be more careful. Simply to avoid all the ill feeling.

you can't tell by just looking at me, but. My joints are incredibly painful & something that doesn't look like much and indeed isn't much (to most people) can be excruciatingly painful.

However, I manage to plaster a smile on & would have just said hello to to your Dd & chatted (if she wanted to)

shes 6, it not like she's much older & being rough.

dont give it another thought!!

You could just have posted this:

I got on a bus yesterday with my DD who is six. She was wearing a backpack with not much in it so it was very light. The bus was quite full, mostly with people who were sitting near the front.

My DD sat down quickly next to another woman as the bus was moving off and she was already getting jolted about. As she sat down I was saying "be careful with your backpack" but as the words were leaving my mouth the bag very lightly bumped the lady on the arm, literally just stroked it. She snatched her arm away, tutted loudly and gave my DD the filthiest look, like she was shit on her shoe.

Had she not done this, the next words out of my mouth would definitely have been an apology but instead I said "she's six years old, she didn't mean it" in a firm voice which I didn't raise.

At the next stop, her and her husband moved seats to a few rows back but the entire 20 minute journey they both stared at me and DD with horrible sneery mouths, looked us up and down, whispered to each other and shook their heads. I also noticed another man sat near us thar kept looking from me to DD and shaking his head like we were doing something wrong. When we got off the bus I looked back and saw them both staring at us out of the window with the same expressions.

Was I rude or did they over-react?
I've always been very hot on manners with my kids so now I'm worried I set a bad example.

But you did.

You posted specifically about elderly women. You could quite easily have posted about other passengers. But you didn't.

You should have apologized to her. Anyway let it go.

Of course you could have apologised. She moved her arm, how did that stop you apologising. She tutted, well she was probably taken by surprise and made a noise, not a big deal. You interpret her looking at your child a certain way, maybe she was just looking at her. You talk about her staring at you for 20 minutes, well you wouldn't know if you weren't staring at her.

Your child bumped into someone, just apologise and move on. You are making a whole drama of it.

Fall onto someone, no matter how lightly or how disgruntled tbe person is you say sorry. You / your child is in the wrong.At 6 your child should have sufficient manors and comprehension to apologise
Maybe if that had actually happened an apology would have been forthcoming? As the dd didn't fall onto anyone, it's irrelevant!

No but the woman didn't say that either. The OP decided she was giving her dirty looks and instead of apologising basically told the woman off.

Yep you were rude. If the bus surged and your child fell it isn't an excuse to land on someone else, it is the reason but not an excuse.

Ypu should have apologised OR at 6 frankly your child should have known to.

Fall onto someone, no matter how lightly or how disgruntled tbe person is you say sorry. You / your child is in the wrong.

At 6 your child should have sufficient manors and comprehension to apologise herself, but as she didn't you should have.

@Rosestulips batshit? Thank you.

And yes, I suppose I do have issues. I really, really despise posts that are ageist. Just as I despise those that are racist, sexist and homophobic. How about you?

God, ignore the posters who claim its "ageism". I think its relevant to the post and in my experience its always older people who are the least tolerant of small children on public transport.

With that said, I do think you should have apologised / told your child to apologise to the lady, it obviously upset her and if you noticed it, it's the polite thing to do.

At no point have I "blamed it on the woman for being old" I simply gave all the information. I also said that she was a woman. I've said that she had a husband. You haven't said I am blaming it on her sex or her marital status.
You obviously have a bee in your bonnet about this "elderly" thing and I suspect its entirely down to your own issues so I wpuld suggest you go deal with them instead of accusing me of ageism despite my perfectly reasonable explanation that others agree with. Noone here is agreeing with you because you are being completly unnecessary.

My reply to you didn't suggest that you were either male or female. Both sexes can be as ageist as each other.

However, absolutely I have a 'bee in my bonnet' about ageist things, because it's totally inappropriate and unnecessary. You have been absolutely ageist in your account of what happened. Why on earth would you raise the issue of the woman's marital status?! I didn't!

Oh and by the way, you actually have no idea how old I am. Have you assumed I am young be arsed I have a child? Bit ageist.

No. Why would I? I haven't assumed any age.

Agree, this poster seems a bit batshit and is massively projecting own issues

There just seems to be such a disapproving anti-child / anti-baby out in public attitude. Regardless, I'd likely have said to my child, "Mummy said be careful darling. Let's say Sorry, please."
And given my sunniest smile. 😁