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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have found my first mammogram really upsetting?

711 replies

YompingJo · 28/04/2024 07:11

Got a letter through with very basic details if an appointment. Turned up and found the whole thing demeaning. Tiny room, intimidating machine taking up most of it. The radiologist was monosyllabic and bossy and manhandled me into the right position including grabbing each breast and shoving it into position, pushing other bits of my body out of the way, not once asking first. I know it's a necessary procedure, but a bit of sensitivity would have gone a long way, and having the respect to ask for consent before grabbing a breast is a basic consideration. I'm autistic and needed to know much more what to expect beforehand. The letter gave a way to request assistance in the case of SEN, but I don't consider myself to have SEN and didn't know what I'd need until I was right there, so that wasn't any help. There was a QR code for feedback, which I gave but I just feel... invaded and demeaned. AIBU?

OP posts:
Bearintheredhat · 28/04/2024 07:21

As someone who lost both breasts last year to breast cancer I can say that those machines were designed by a man.
no women would invent such a machine.

The take away from this OP is that if you want to be treated as if you have SEN you need to tell them you have SEN.

Petrine · 28/04/2024 07:21

The Radiographer has to position the breast to get clear images. Surely you know that a breast scan is going to involve manipulation of your breasts?

BatshitCrazyWoman · 28/04/2024 07:20

I'm sorry you had that experience. I've always in the past had very respectful and kind women doing my mammograms. Until the last one, who was as you describe, cold, unfriendly, lots of 'orders' ('move' 'lift' 'get dressed'). Very unpleasant. Actually I wish I had complained, it's a pretty intimate thing, a decent 'bedside' manner is not a lot to ask. Might go private next time.

Freakinfraser · 28/04/2024 07:19

Surely you knew why you were there? I think, and I mean this gently, please ask for assistance next time ahead. You need to use your words. Good luck.

Doingmybest12 · 28/04/2024 07:19

It sounds like the service wasn't great in terms of communication but there is so much information freely available about what it involves. I think it might be a good habit to check things like this out on line first or ring ahead if you know your ASD means it's hard to always take things in your stride. I think it's well known it can be pretty unpleasant, potentially uncomfortable and very upclose and personal.

Mercurial123 · 28/04/2024 07:18

YABVU. If you are anxious about a medical appointment, you need to find out everything you can before the appointment. I've never been asked for consent. It's a given that's what you're there for. Manage ways to cope with your anxiety.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 28/04/2024 07:17

Consent should have been requested and they should not have just man handled you.

Bronfenbrenner · 28/04/2024 07:16

Although mammograms are uncomfortable and quite strange, I've always been treated kindly. Very kindly in fact. If you can, do make a complaint. Then find a way to move on. Try not to ruminate.

I'm so sorry this happened to you.

LittleBooThang · 28/04/2024 07:14

If you needed to know more of what to expect you could have rang them up and asked them, or at the very least googled and done your own research.

aerkfjherf · 28/04/2024 07:14

you are so fortunate to be in a country where this service is offered, just be grateful it has been done. It isn't fun in any circumstances, but it is a real privilege to get it

Eurghkids · 28/04/2024 07:13

never once, have I not been asked or forwarned before being touched in an appointment like that. You are not wrong, and you would not be wrong to complain. I’m so sorry you were treated so robotically OP. X