Have I just been dumped before we even began ??

Why are you hung up on a stranger who clearly had no real interest in you, but was clearly lining you up for a threesome?

Some men do use OLD as free prostitution, and some
with kinks or fantasies they never got to play out will literally groom the women they meet into perform whatever fetish they are into.

don’t be naive.

Surely when you know someone a little better, have had sex with them and can talk about what you enjoy in context

Obviously if you're hard core S & M (or hardcore anything sexual) I'm assuming that you'd date from a particular 'pool'

There wouldn't be much point dating me, for example 🙄 or anyone who isn't into hard core kinks

I seem to have used the phrase 'hard core' way too much

Apologies 🤪

I’m doing it right then!

Never, in my book!

So at what point is it OK to raise the topic of a threesome? Or indeed any other kink?

What a lucky escape.

Dear god, I’d be thankful I’d been dumped (if that’s the case) very early on, he’s an utter creep and certainly not someone who has any respect for you. He’s clearly indicated what he’s after and it’s not you as a person, just an available sex object.
🤮

I see, I misunderstood you.

That's not what I said.

It's the 'it's totally fine if you aren't interested' that gives off the 'I'm not that into you' vibe. That would be the case regardless of the reason behind it. That came from the op, not the guy.

I agree that he doesn't sound like someone op should want to be with anyway - but that wasn't the question that was asked.

How is not being up for threesomes "not being that into him"?

I think OP has had a lucky escape.

I think you should review your conversation. It seems to me that you, very nicely, dumped him in that 'it's not you, it's me' sort of way.

Which was the right thing to do. Once a man brings up the subject of threesomes, they very rarely let it go. It always seems to creep back into conversations now and again. Very tiresome to keep having to justify saying no over and over.

urgh talking about threesomes before you’ve even properly got together how tacky. Is romance dead?

you’ve had a lucky escape OP throw this one back

So you basically told him you aren't that into him (if you were you wouldn't have said that you were 'totally fine' if he wasn't interested), and now you think he's the one that has called time, when he's actually the one that said 'we'll keep in touch'? If anything, it sounds like you dumped him.

You got into the situation of discussing sexual fantasies/kinks very early on. He was honest and told you his. Understandably, this isn't for you. It doesn't make him a monster though!
If I were you, and things progress, I'd constantly be wondering if he wanted the threesome, if he was thinking about it. I'd be paranoid that I wasn't enough. So on that basis, I'd be happy to part.
As for whether you've been dumped, I don't know.

Why would you be bothered by this man opting out? I'm wondering why you didn't dump him on the spot!

Rubbish took itself out.

what a Prince amongst Men.

honestly OP why invest a moment of your energy on someone who's a slime ball. Up the ante on your self-esteem.

Sounds like he wants something casual not serious. So when he says we'll keep in touch he means he will keep you as an option in case you change your mind. I think if he wants to see you again he would've said 'when are you free or let's see each other again'.

The questions is, do you want to see him again? Because it actually sounds like you have dumped him tbf.

what a Prince!

I would block and move on

I can’t believe you didn’t want a threesome on the second date!!
He sounds a charmer.

Women who agree to threesomes involving another woman are known as unicorns because they’re so rare! He shared a fantasy, it’s a pretty common one. You’ve stated your feelings. Not sure if you’ve been dumped but maybe think about if he’s for you or if you think he might pressure you into something you don’t want to do further down the line.

Bet he has a few females on the go.
It is all part of the dating game.
Finding and fitting into each other's desires and needs.
I wouldn't be analysing it myself.
It's a polite way to keep your number handy, probably.

Talking about a threesome on your first date, how romantic! You dodged a bullet.

You offered him the opportunity to not bother with you any more or keep you dangling should he choose to

He sounds truly awful. Asking about threesomes when you'd not even had sex yet....yuk.🤮

Have some self respect and get rid of this man child for good

You've not DTD yet and he's saying he wants a threesome?

Let's hope he's dumped you as you appear not to realise it's you that should be doing the dumping.