MIL coming to stay with added extra

Is MIL now in a Travelodge?

Well done OP and good luck for today, really hoping everything goes smoothly.

I think you’ve taken a really mature approach to this situation. Your DP clearly has some issues he needs to work out. He was abandoned by his mother as a child, which must have been traumatic, and that’s not his fault. However he’s now an adult and needs to address that trauma and move on if he is to be a good partner and father. You have shown him how a woman can be both wel-boundaried and reasonable, neither of which are qualities he will have seen in his mother. Your grown-up, rational behaviour has shone a light on her self-centred manipulation and hopefully he is beginning to see her for who she really is. If he is genuinely a good person in other situations then I think you are right to give him a chance to sort himself out. Sometimes it takes a crisis to push people into changing deeply ingrained ways. And I have complete faith in you OP that you won’t be taking any more bollocks from him now that you both know you have the option to move out.

Oh WELL DONE! 🌟

Your found your rage and your strength at a time when you shouldn't have had to.

This woman descends on your home, takes it over - and now wonders why you aren't there and can't see she's the reason. There's something wrong with her, isn't there.

Your partner put her first, told you she'd always come first over his partner and child - and now realises there are consequences to being a wimpish mummy's boy. She made him this way.

Well done, birthing partner.

Well done, letting agent.

👏💐👏💐👏💐👏💐👏💐👏💐

Good luck today @Babycatsmummy.

Let us know how it goes and please do keep us updated about how it's going with your MIL. I'm a bit worried she will camp out at yours from morning until night if you don't put your foot down.

Make it clear that she can't come over for more than a couple of hours at a time and not when your own visitors are there. And if she and your partner don't respect your wishes, don't be afraid to go back to stay at your friend's house.

I never said that!!!! Think you need better comprehension skills.

Best of luck today and onwards @Babycatsmummy!

I think I might really love your letting agent a bit 😍I can only imagine how that news went down in Casa Overstay-your-welcome 😆

@LemonyFace you're right. It's lovely to read someone being strong and not backing down.

Because of your comments about lily livered ops with issues who don't follow advise?

Why are you @ ing me? All I did was wish op best of luck, and say what lots of others have said - that her dp was in the wrong.

I wonder if there'll be massive enlargements on the walls for his 21st birthday or his wedding?

Good luck op and hopefully the midwife can help impress the points.

@LemonyFace

What a bizzare point of view? Remember usually people posting are polite, nice decent people who respect others and yet by dint of having a partner are suddenly faced with an unreasonable person who treats them rudely.

It takes time for this to sink in, one thinks, was it a one off? What's happening and over time they wear one down and one becomes accustomed to it.
Then one gets to a point, trigger points are commonly around a birth and you have to think about someone else else eg the baby and that's when people have enough.

At that point again usually one has to change ones whole thought process to act in a way we don't usually act in or havant needed too.

That's hard and it's a process! Someone on mn should never expect or be disappointed someone didn't instantly leave their partner or "do what they said".
How bizzare!
However gently offering advice, and a different pov is helpful and helps one to reach that "I'm better than this" mindset.

It's a process.

All the best for today Op.

Very true, it was the letting agent who sorted this out, not your DP

I would be very reluctant to trust your “D” P. He never stood up for you. He didn’t fight for you.

@Babycatsmummy needs to pass that over the midwife who can have a talk with partner

Just be very careful once baby arrives OP. Very very common for partners/MILS to tread over your boundaries and when you try to reinforce them tell you you're hormonal/have PND. Infact many women develop PND because of how they're treated after baby is born. Good luck with baby.

Good luck for tomorrow… I hope you go into natural labour tonight @Babycatsmummy .. I really do hope MIL now respects your wishes and let’s you rest, I hope your DP pulls his big boy pants up and steps up for you and your son xx

I can’t believe the nerve of him to be moaning to you about things his mum is doing in the flat. Like you’re a team. Instead of he’s a spineless wanker who won’t prioritise you.

All the best for the birth of your baby. You are so strong to stand up for your baby and yourself against your dp and mil and the mil friend. Ask your dp to open the windows of your place to get fresh air in. Tell him to have the place spotless with your belongings back in place. Keep your boundaries against the mil.

i think youre letting p off the hook a bit

its him tthat invited an let her stay over against your wishes why would anything change now

he shhould have kiked her out when you aske not an when a letting agent said to

Loved your update, keep us posted!

@Babycatsmummy reading your updates has been brilliant well done for staying strong and taking control your partner is now indeed reaping what he sowed. I'd let him stew longer if I were you he doesn't sound as if he's learned a thing from this I wouldn't be surprised if he's pissed off you left him to deal with it even though its of his own making. Its so refreshing to have an OP who has taken control and not compromised their boundaries. Good luck tomorrow OP make sure you tell the midwives MIL is not to be let in until you say and if DP tries to sneak her in make sure they know to tell her to leave.

Really hope this is the kick up the bum dp needs?