To consider selling our house and travelling the world with two toddlers?

To be clear, I think travelling abroad, as in going on holidays, is great for kids and we do it once or twice a year. It's great to see new places. We're actually going to visit relatives in SE Asia ourselves later this year, for two weeks.

But I think a stable home, a base that you return to after travelling, is essential for emotional and social development too.

I travelled the world independently in my 20s and I would say absolutely not with toddlers. It's challenging enough as it is. I don't think it'd be fair on them either.

I think it sounds like an incredible experience. I’d probably choose AirBnB/apart-hotels rather than hotels - you end up going to sleep at the same time as the kids if you’re piled into one room and access to some sort of kitchen helps with food costs to have some meals in.

Do you really think that families without extended families are that damaging to children?

Not necessarily extended families, but adults that a child knows, yes. Also other children as regular playmates.

Our extended family live abroad and up north, respectively, so we don't see them on a weekly basis although they visit often.

But locally nearly-4yo knows, by name and to chat to (supervised): nursery teachers, nursery classmates, several sets of neighbours and their kids/grandkids, our close friends, my "mum friends" and their children.

She's got to know their personalities, likes/dislikes, their idiosyncrasies. And they know hers.

If you're travelling here and there, your child never gets to know anyone properly except the nuclear family. They'd miss out on so much interesting ideas and conversations because all interaction with people outside the family is of a superficial here-today-gone-tomorrow kind. Like I said upthread, a conveyor belt of strangers.

The child also can't become attached to other children as playmates because they don't know if they'll see them again.

You will get a place but you won't get a choice and may have to go to a school many miles away that has a space. You should read the primary education forum about school applications process, there's plenty of info on there.

I have found parts stressful, but overall, I really enjoy taking them away and giving them new experiences (even if they are too young to really remember!).

They are too young to remember any of it to any degree at all. Let's get real. You aren't doing it for them. I think it is a self-indulgent and foolish plan.

She says she would be delaying school start though

You say you're not running from anything, but you also said you DH is 'very unhappy and stressed' – that's not just 'bored of the UK'. What makes him so unhappy? Does he need to re-train or change industries to improve his work happiness?

How late would the school start be? Would you start them in reception a year later? (That runs the risk of effecting your child's self-esteem for the rest of their school career). Or trying to get a place mid-year for the year they were 'supposed' to be in? You should check out how oversubscribed your primary school options are if your plan is to do a mid-year application.

I also wouldn't sell the house – but another thing to consider is that house insurance does not allow you leave the property empty for more than 30-60 days, and it will be a condition of your mortgage (if you have one) to ensure the property is insured.

I'm genuinely intrigued as to how you think there is a downside to this for the children, providing that OP comes back before her 3.5-year-old starts school.

What stable foundation would they be missing? Lots of kids parent's don't have assets, if you're referring to the house being sold.

@travellingwithtoddlers On the school front, it might be worth researching in the new city. Where I am, there's a big school shortage, so you'd probably get offered a poorly-rated school on the outskirts of nowhere, but it won't be the same everywhere. Some places will have spare spaces in year.

I still wouldn't delay school start, I do think that's unfair, but I would absolutely do the adventure!

Yeah, failing your kids is hilarious

😂😂😂😂😂

This is such a bad idea. Your poor kids, having no stable foundation, no proper assets, money pissed up the wall on their parents’ jollies that they won’t be able to take advantage of later in life.

This would be such a a selfish, thoughtless decision.

Why not move to the new city, rent, and start exploring together a new UK life.
You can still have a fortnight in Bali if you want the beach but you could spend the UK summer going to arts cinemas/community gardening/yoga/Morris dancing/choir what ever you fancy, tag teaming the parenting so you both get a physical & mental break. Going swimming, bike rides as a family. Build community relationships, find friends, entertain, get yourself a really strong foundation to build for the future.

Propping up the kafala system might get you some stunning infinity pool pictures, whilst eyeballing non swimming kids, but is it really worth the Cost of luxury

Sorry if you’ve already answered this question, but where will you live when you return to the UK and your DH is job-hunting? Could you stay with family to save money?

It'll be tough to get a rental with no income, you could always get a long term Airbnb, I suppose.

Now is quite simply the worst time to do this.
The worst.

Your DCs need stability and routine now. You need to put this first.
Go to "a country" for a year. Not back packing.

DH would turn down the offer of the new job and hope to get something else upon our return

It all seems very "pie in the sky" - how will you get a rental or a mortgage when neither of you are working? How will you get your children a school place if you don’t have a fixed address? How will you afford to homeschool if neither of you have a guaranteed job?

The issue with renting her home out is that her tenants may refuse to leave - it could cost a fortune taking them to court and who knows what state the house would be left in.

You'd also need a mortgage that allowed you to have tenants in the first place.

I would have to home school until a place did come up. Are primary schools really so full that it’s a possibility I wouldn’t be able to get a place (genuinely asking as I didn’t know this?)?!

It depends on the area and how large the school is, I guess, but it's definitely something you need to consider - tor financial reasons as much as anything else.

Their world will shrink to just the nuclear family.

@Mumoftwo1312 Do you really think that families without extended families are that damaging to children?

We don't have grandparents - my parents died when I was a child, DH's chose not to have anything to do with our son. DH has half-brothers but is forbidden any contact with them. We have friends, of course, but I'm not sure that I'd say that they've meaningfully contributed to his life in the way you're implying - and we'd certainly make friends abroad, too.

DS has been babysat by one person since he was born; for 4 hours, on one occasion. Otherwise he's been with me or DH. I'm not sure this is that unusual, or damaging. It's just how it is.

@ChiefEverythingOfficer Any tips?!