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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have avoided the "outstanding" school?

80 replies

Thaimoon · 23/04/2024 19:40

We live in a large city. Pfb is 4, off to school in September.

I admit to being anxious and to overthinking most big decisions I make so throwing this out here for some perspective and the benefit of other's experience.

Just received confirmation that the school we picked as our first choice is the one our child has a place at, all good. On looking round, it seemed a nice school with a good friendly feel to it, it's very diverse and extremely local to us. So, I was happy with this.

Then, preschool tells me that all dc's little friends are off to the outstanding rated primary down the road from us (both schools in walking distance from our home).

We did look around this school too. It has had an outstanding ofsted twice in a row. It is a faith school, and we do not practice any religion in our family. Not necessarily an issue for many, I get this, but I thought it might be a bit confusing for dc.

However, the main thing that put me off was the treatment of a child with learning needs that I witnessed whilst being shown around (by a senior member of staff) which to me was distressing and disturbing to watch.

Its got great academic results and clearly is doing something right. But for me the behaviour I witnessed was a deal breaker.

Just having a last minute wobble about the fact that most of dc preschool parents have picked an outstanding school, and that they won't be with their friends. AIBU to pick a lower rated school based on a gut feeling from one incident I witnessed?

OP posts:
LoveSandbanks · 23/04/2024 19:56

I'm at the other end of this with plb just about to leave secondary school. Outstanding schools are often bollocks - they know how to pass the ofsted inspection and have excellent paperwork, often at the expense of those with SEND. An outstanding junior school failed all three of my boys (I didn't realise until it was too late to save the third). My youngest achieved the lowest possible score in his English SATs at the outstanding school (he's dyslexic and had no appropriate support until Senior school). Outstanding schools are often oversubscribed but a "good" school may be undersubscribed with teachers that really put the effort into the children rather than the paperwork

takemeawayagain · 23/04/2024 19:56

It sounds very much like you made the right choice.

cansu · 23/04/2024 19:54

No you can of course choose what you like for whatever reason. However it is a bit daft to make a judgement based on one incident you saw with a child you know nothing about. Staff in schools often have to deal with difficult or dysregulated or violent behaviour. You will see it happen in every school.

Dacadactyl · 23/04/2024 19:46

If you've picked the school you think is right for your child, you won't have gone wrong. Others parents have just picked the school they think is right for their child.

At 4 they'll easily make new friends, so don't worry about them going elsewhere.

RomeoRivers · 23/04/2024 19:43

I think you made the right call.