To expect dd to be able to see a female nurse/dr at the sexual health clinic

If the NHS doesn’t have one available at that point then no they can’t have one.

If they feel like they need a female then they need to request one at the point of making the appointment, if they have to wait longer for a female doctor then so be it. That’s on them.

However I don’t think limiting yourself to female only doctors is a good thing, if you need medical attention then you need it.

I work in Sexual Health and it is good practice to see all patients on their own. It is recommended for Safeguarding reasons.

If a patient would prefer to be seen alone they may not feel able to say so in front of the accompanying person.

The patient may not be aware of the personal questions that will be asked.

With young people, and others, they often give more/more accurate information if parent not in the room.

People being abused/trafficked may attend with a 'friend', 'sister' etc who is actually there to check what they're saying. This happened in the Rochdale sexual exploitation situation.

We always give the option for parent/accompanying friend to come in later in consultation.

What about rape victims? Dv victims? Women who are devoutly religious?

There absolutely should be a female doctor if required.

Sexual health clinics do all kinds of things. What a rude judgemental comment.

You've missed the message. The message being taught is that you can don't have to do anything with a man that makes you feel uncomfortable, you can say no 🤦

sorry my 1st gynaecologist was a female and she was an out and out bitch. had me in tears a few times and completely dimsimissive of my condition. which was server endometriosis..my second gynaecologist was a man and he was a gentleman always had a nurse when he was examining me and addresses each of my concerns. was a little bit apprehensive when he retired. luckily my next gynaecologist also a male is lovely. my friend has just had a few dealings with him and says he is a gentleman. delighted she got him after also dealing with my bitch of a gynaecologist who i dunno is still allowed practice.
I get why ops daughter wanted to see a female and she is entileted to request that. but my experience of female doctors hasn't been good

Given that women have experienced plenty of sexual assault and inappropriate comments from male physicians, yes.

@TinyYellow "YABU and you aren’t doing your dd any favours by teaching her that she can’t be treated by men."

She isn't. She's teaching her dd that it's absolutely fine for her to have a preference and ask for it. Women are allowed to do that, you know.

Would you say this for all women? What about Muslim women? What about abused women?
There should be chaperones, even if it’s a receptionist. It’s for the patient and nurse’s protection.

Our GP surgery has one male doctor and he's part time as he was meant to retire pre covid but they haven't been able to find a replacement. DH doesn't get the choice of seeing a male doctor, these days he's just pleased to get any appointment.

I suspect a previous poster may have got ignored correct, the doctor was simply annoyed that it was a wasted appointment.

Bollocks to that.

If a woman wants to only see a female medic for any reason, but particularly when it’s related to a women’s sexual health, that should be granted.

Yes, you might have to wait longer for the appointment, but this is why we must carry on campaigning to preserve the sex based rights of women and girls.

Seems to be a lot of onus on the patient here.

Personally, something that I really rate about my GP is the times I’ve gone to see him about something that requires me to be physically vulnerable he has always said ‘oh I’ve booked a chaperone’. Never ‘do you want one?’ Just already thought of it and booked it. I don’t mean just vaginal examinations. It’s really thoughtful. It means a lot.

I know the rules around NHS chaperones (am NHS clinical staff myself) but I think we put too much onus on the patient.

It takes no thought at all to assume that a 15yr of girl will rather speak to a female dr or nurse. None. We need to make healthcare more accessible to young women, not less.

OP, your expectations were entirely reasonable.

How brave of you both then, to admit how fucking thick you are.

You don’t need to explain yourself OP. And although it’s perfectly fine for the medical professional in these cases to check regarding whether the YP wants a parent/guardian present (due to Gillick Competency concerns presumably), he absolutely should not have been irritated once your DD confirmed she wanted you present.

I assumed my DD (15) would be seen by a female HCP when she went to the sexual health clinic. She'd booked herself in and I just gave her a lift. She asked and stupidly I said it'd be a female nurse she'd see. Wrong. It was a male nurse but he was absolutely brilliant. She had an excellent experience. But lesson learnt for when she goes for a smear or needs an internal exam.

‘All genders’??? Wtf cult language is that? I assume you mean ‘both sexes’?

YABU to assume that there would be a female available. If you want a specific sex doctor, you need to ask when booking the appointment.

Don’t lie. You edited the post, the edit history is there. How embarrassing for you. Would you like me to screenshot it? You look like a fool.

We bloody shouldn't have to get used to it.
Some people's bar is so low.

Not true. Several studies, including one out this week, have shown that female patients get better care and have better outcomes, when seen by a female medical practitioners.

@Bibpot good for you for sticking up for your 15 year old daughter. I have done the same with both of mine.