If I said no to this get together

Book a restaurant or function room nearby. Attend if he can.

If he's invited everyone over and you are in labour and you both dash off to hospital that leaves his family with no sensible plan, equally you could both be just coming home after 3 days in labour in hospital and neither of you want a house full of people and neither will be remotely able to look after them. With a venue nearby booked he can show up and see them if it's do-able but need to be very aware that he might be otherwise engaged at the time and that's is not remotely sensible ( or fair).

Hell no. Not at 39+2 ( or even a days old infant) and a lively 5 year old.
Tell DH to book a restaurant!!

Not a chance. There is every possibility that you will be breathing in gas and air, clutching his hand and pushing a baby out at the point he should be grilling sausages for 18 people.

Is he normally this dim? Or optimistic?

Dear god, is he mad? Just no, obviously. I’m beyond amazed that he even thought to ask. You could be in active labour or have just given birth. Crazy.

I think it would be a real shame for the family to not all meet up but it's probably best to hire a function room or similar - or a table at a restaurant nearby then back to yours for cups of tea - no catering - but also so you can go to bed but still have your partner in the same building.

Either way it’s a no. My point was that far into pregnancy hosting isn’t the dream. Assuming she makes it that far, she might have a 3 day old by that point!

But you don’t get to rest when pregnant and with another young child so it’s not as if the OP will get to lie down.

Yeah book a restaurant. It’s not like you can guarantee BBQ weather (if in UK) and it’d be crap having them all stuck inside your house. Also you might have to cancel last minute if you do go into labour. It’s a nice idea but not the best plan.

However, it’s totally reasonable for him to want to see all his cousins and not have to go 2 hours away to do so, so tell him to get thinking of alternatives!

I disagree with everyone and the OP! I think it's a great opportunity to meet up. It would be lovely for your daughter too.

I agree with the OP that she shouldn't have to do anything. I wouldn't but I wouldn't have a problem saying no if asked. Unless the cousins are awful people I bet they will be happy to help. Tell people you can't help and sit back and enjoy yourself.
I don't think a 5 year old (even a lovely one) old needs much parenting in a house with 18 people in it.

If you are actually worried how about getting a babysitter to help watch the kids or paying a neighbours teen to help with cleaning up.
I know the OP is very pregnant but the chances are she won't give birth that day and if she does or if she has the baby early then you will have to cancel. It's not the end of the world.
I'd see it as an exciting fun thing to do rather than a huge burden but then I'f be happy to sit down and do nothing.

Just say no! This is coming from someone who did go into labour while some of husband family were over, it really was horrible and I really didn't know what to do at the moment it started. You really don't need the extra pressure and 2nd births can be faster.

No, just no. I have never been 39 +2 with a baby. But l did make it to 37 +2 with twins and no way would l have agreed with this. By that point l was lying on a bed with a sheet over my head, could barely sleep or eat. Of course you will get sucked into doing stuff.

As others have said, it's up to your husband's auntie to organise this. You could turn up if you felt well enough

😂

What in the name of all that's holy did I just read?!!!!

Are there any offers of someone doing a get-together nearer his family? Then perhaps he could bring your daughter with him to see extended family, while you stay at home and take a rest day? You will be either heavily pregnant or have a new little one.

Either that or like other suggested, book a room somewhere or cater it at yours, but you will be sitting with feet up! I think it's not so much the adults, but the 6 young children that make the work.

The chance that you will be in hospital out of it on gas and air, your DH will be with you and someone else will be needed to look after your 5 yr old at the exact moment they all want to arrive for lunch is too high to overlook. Its just not worth the risk.

your DH is kind but very short sighted. Someone else can plan it at a convenient pub or function room at a good midway point from all the families, and if you are in a fit state when the day rolls around, you will join in the festivities and might even manage a very short stroll.

anything else is folly

If other family live 2.5 hrs away why is everyone schlepping to you? Maybe helpful suggestion Auntie could host instead? Or will it suddenly be 'no one else has a big enough house/garden' guilt fest?

A meal out or a catered buffet in a hall/pub etc is a better option and no back to your house afterwards.

Just find a venue to meet up or else say you’ll have to confirm closer to the time but if it can go ahead, you will just be ordering sandwiches or buffet food in and it will just be low key.

No, you will be too heavily pregnant. Please say no.

I definitely don't think it's unreasonable to say no. The idea of getting a function room is a good one

my husband's auntie has suggested a get together would be nice one day on the weekend.

Lovely. Why doesn’t she organise something then?!

Why is he even asking..because he is too cowardly to say absolutely not, my wife is 39+ weeks pregnant and it's a ridiculous idea. He wants you to do the hard part.
Do it, say no.

All PP are right. Book a pub or restaurant. Those who want could also go for a nice walk before or after (that won't include you!!).

Or if for some reason it absolutely has to be at your house: everyone brings a dish or two and your husband organises who brings what to make sure it's coordinated, so he's not trying to shop and cook for 18 people; everyone eats of paper plates and drinks from paper cups etc so at the end everything is just thrown in blah bags in the bin (this is not the time to worry about the environment); everyone is told in advance by your DH that they will have to help clean up before they leave so that his heavily pregnant wife doesn't have to do a thing and gets a spotless house and garden back.

Ridiculous. For all he knows you'll be in labour that day or the day before. Why are they all coming that week anyway..this better not be so they can all see the new baby at once