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Original poster

To think it’s rude not to wave your guests goodbye?

439 replies

Pastelbuttercream · 22/04/2024 06:22

I was brought up to always wave guests goodbye at the door and only shut the front door once they had driven off. This was the norm when I was growing up, everyone did it. If they were not parked near your house you’d walk to their car and wave them off there.

The amount of people who do not do this anymore surprises me. I always feel it’s rude but maybe I am out of touch?

If you don’t wave your guests off, why not? (besides having to close the door incase your toddler runs out, this I completely understand!)

Am I old fashioned? Is this not a thing anymore?

OP posts:
toastofthetown · 22/04/2024 06:43

PigglyWigglyOhYeah · 22/04/2024 06:35

I always do it and like it when it is done to me. I find just shutting the door on guests really rude.

I don’t just push guests outside and shut the door on them. I say goodbye and that it was lovely to see them etc. Then when they’ve left, close the door (not on them). Out of curiosity, do you wave people off when they are walking down the street too? It seems mostly a car based thing in my experience.

Lemons1571 · 22/04/2024 06:37

Maybe it’s phones and higher tech that have changed the attitude to this? There didn’t used to be anything to do in a car between getting in and driving off!

PigglyWigglyOhYeah · 22/04/2024 06:35

I always do it and like it when it is done to me. I find just shutting the door on guests really rude.

NeverEnoughPants · 22/04/2024 06:35

Great idea! Let's draw out the goodbye for as long as possible and make it as awkward as possible!

I don't understand why anyone would want to do that. Do you actually enjoy standing silently waving at people for that length of time, op?

Applesandpears23 · 22/04/2024 06:34

I wish my in laws wouldn’t do this. The children continue to scream bye bye bye until they shut the door. DP and I can’t talk about route home or what we need to pick up for dinner. We feel under pressure to get everyone belted in quickly and drive off. Often we have to stop around the corner to deal with whatever the children need from the boot that they didn’t remember because they were too busy shouting “bye”.

hopscotcher · 22/04/2024 06:32

Personally I don't like being waved off at the door, pleasant gesture though it is. I feel like it puts pressure on me to drive off straight away when I might want to spend a few minutes doing something on my phone or whatever.

Hollyhead · 22/04/2024 06:32

Oh my god is THAT why people do that? I absolutely hate it as it puts pressure on the car faffing stage! I want to leave without being watched in case it takes -a few mins to get sunnier on/set up sat nav/pass drinks to the kids etc! For the love of god please stop!!!!

AchillesHeelys · 22/04/2024 06:32

The only people I know who do this are in their 70s and 80s. It’s sweet but very old fashioned. If any of my friends did this when I went round I’d find it a bit awkward.

littlebitstuck2024 · 22/04/2024 06:30

Aww I remember when my grandma used to do that. It is very old fashioned now, I haven't seen anyone do it for about 20 years and even then, that was just my grandma and her generation from before the second world war.
I think you should carry on as you are, it's really sweet.

Merrow · 22/04/2024 06:30

We don't because of child wrangling - DS1 has just reached that stage where he finds people leaving really upsetting, so a quick goodbye in the living room and then closing the door while guests sort themselves out to leave is easier on him. **

toastofthetown · 22/04/2024 06:29

I hate it as a guest. I often get to my car and want to set up maps and choose a podcast or music to listen to for the way home. Maybe reply to some messages I haven’t answered because I’ve been visiting someone. But I can’t do that in my own time because someone is standing in the doorway waiting for me.

WhatWouldYouDo33 · 22/04/2024 06:29

Old fashioned and OTT.
my MIL does this and I hate it too. Just say bye and close the door.

ApplesOnWards · 22/04/2024 06:24

God no!

I hate being waved off. My mum does this and I find it way over the top, just say goodbye and let me go without all the waving.

Mistredd · 22/04/2024 06:24

I normally do for guests who’ve come a long way in the day time but I wouldn’t stand out at night or for local friends or walk to their car round the corner.