To think it’s rude not to wave your guests goodbye?

Haha me too - this reminded me of an older couple we know... whenever we go round, we get waved off at the door. Now, we wave goodbye, go around the corner, park up, and then sort out satnav and so on!

I hate being waved off. You have said goodbye, so just go indoors. It makes you feel rushed and often, I spend a couple of minutes deciding what music to put on.

Mind you, when my close family come round, I say bye to them from the living room and they let themselves out. I don't really see close family as guests, they don't have to knock, they let themselves in and they can let themselves out.

For other guests who aren't so close I would see them to the door.

In our family we throw a cup or bowl of water after someone as they leave, that is considered the most courteous way

Check messages to see if any need replying to before I leave (since I've been chatting to my host and not paying attention to phone). Possibly text someone so they know when to expect me.

Possibly set up a podcast or audiobook.

Set up google maps. Possibly look at traffic/ make route choices.

Check I have a water bottle accessible, and a snack if needed. Check I have a sensible number of layers of clothing on.

Breathe. And go.

To be fair, half the time i forget one of these and have to stop anyway. But I'm way more likely to remember them if there's not someone distracting me.

It's really not grouchy and antisocial not to want to be stared at while you drive off

I always wave my guests off, but I don't hang around on the doorstep unless they are older, just to make sure they get off alright.

All the people who do this - would you stop if someone asked you not to, or said it made them uncomfortable?

Because I've asked people not to do this to me and some insist on doing it anyway which seems really odd and actually quite rude.

I'm actually pretty upset reading all these posts. I honestly thought that my love shone through to my kids and grandkids when I do this.

Please don't be upset! MNers are notoriously grouchy and antisocial, I'm sure your family love and appreciate it.

I do wave off some of my older relatives as I know that they would be hurt if I didn't. Many of my friends seem to be very forgetfully so I tend to do a quick sweep around the house to make sure they have not forgotten anything particular those who had to travel a fair bit

Because it would make me anxious and uncomfortable for people to stand in the door watching me get my shit together in the car. I'd feel rushed and twitchy. I don't do it to my guests because I hate it being done to me.

My granny and grandad always did this and I found it a bit awkward, the whole extended family shuffling outside as if leaving their house was a Big Event. To be fair though, she is now 90 and has only recently been convinced to answer the phone with "hello" rather than "[Surname] residence, Mrs [Surname] speaking" 😅

Thankfully, my mum didn't inherit the waving habit. She doesn't even get off the sofa when I leave her house, we just say goodbye and I walk out. Much less faff!

I wouldn't worry, if some people don't find something about which to feel offended they worry!

When we lived abroad and came over for holidays etc, my parents would wave to us as we drove away to start our journey back and I would look in the mirror wondering if this was the last time I would see them alive and, of course, one day it was for my Dad.

I hate this. Please leave me to faff in the car for 5 minutes before starting my journey.

I fail to see why this is considered good manners, when it makes so many people uncomfortable.

My husbands best friend follows us out to the car, even when we really need to get away and have said so several times...and another half hour conversation takes place at the car! Drives me insane when I just want to go!
When I've stayed over at my best friends house an hour and a half away, she walks me out to the car, we hug and I now say, "You may as well go in, as I need to set my music up etc" and she does!
Usually when I've been visiting, I say "There's no need to see us/me out". Or if someone has visited me, I see them to the door and once they're out of the gate, I close the door!
Can't be faffing with endless waving and grinning!!! 🤣🤣🤣

Me too. I always wave guests off.

We were taught to do this, along with answering the phone with the words 'Sheffield 2398' (for eg) so that the caller knew they'd reached the correct number. We washed our hands before a meal. Waited until everyone was served to begin. Waited until after everyone was finished before saying, 'Please may I get down?' Said, 'Thank you for having me,' every time we went to someone else's house. Called their parents 'Mr and Mrs Jones'. I didn't grow up in anything other than a very ordinary home.

There are so many things that were drummed into us as kids as being the polite and courteous thing to do; there was an accepted way to behave. It's probably why I find a lot of younger people pretty rude about the 'basics' nowadays.

Then you have to find another place to park (not easy in many places). And start your car a second time, which isn't great for the engine.

It's no big deal, but its more annoying than a kindness. If for some reason there was a problem with my car I could always go back and knock on their door.

I would ALWAYS say goodbye at the door (I think it's rude not to show guests out!) but then close the door as they walk off. Definitely wouldn't wave off in the car or anything.

An exception to this is when people have travelled a long way and I don't see them very often - we usually hang about/help them get ready to leave and then wave them off until they're out of sight. (But would never rush them or anything.)

I hate it when people do this. It takes a while to get everything sorted ready to drive off, especially if you've got a long drive ahead and need to sort out sat nav/audio book/snacks/kids. I feel under too much pressure with someone waiting expectantly for me to leave so they can shut the door and it's irritating having to leave before I'm ready and then have to stop again once I'm out of sight.

I was brought up to always wave guests goodbye at the door and only shut the front door once they had driven off. This was the norm when I was growing up, everyone did it. If they were not parked near your house you’d walk to their car and wave them off there.

I hate hate HATE this!! I need to concentrate on getting out of the parking space for one thing, and don't want to be distracted by worrying they're judging me. The tension while you're waiting for the last shouts of 'Goodbye! Take care! Drive safely! Message when you get there! Bye!' is too cringingly awkward.

Agree with this. Its stressful if people are waiting for you to drive off!

It would be common enough in Ireland, I've always done it and I'm not ancient! My dad still stands at the door and waves us off, it makes me tear up.

It's mainly done though for people who would have travelled a bit to visit you. Where i live now, in a big town, we would wave people to their car and then go back in the house and let them get set up for their journey.

My family always do this - though I do remember leaving my toddler at my mother's, with aunties and nieces there also, and lowering my window to wave, only to find no one at window or door. My status had obviously dropped, and DS was star of the show 🤣 It was unusual enough for me to still remember.

I hate being waved off. I want to get the kids into the car ( which sometimes takes AGES) organize myself. Take off/put on an extra layer, check the traffic on GPS, find my water, do I have a tissue etc
Someone standing there watching makes me anxious and annoyed.

My aunt stood to wave me off the first time we went somewhere with DC. (Small baby). I said please don't stand and watch us leave, we'll be a while. She insisted. We had to drive off and stop just out of sight to organize ourselves. So stressful

God I hate it when people stand there for ever waiting for you to pull off the driveway. As I'm a normal, polite person, I tend not to use my phone when I'm spending time with someone, so when I get back in the car I generally like to check my phone, reply to anything I need to, generally faff about a bit. Obviously that has to be done before I drive away. It's really annoying when people stand there staring at you while you're trying to get sorted.

We always wave people off in my family. It’s so ingrained that I feel guilty shutting the door on a tradesman and their van.

For those who hate being waved off, can’t you just say “please don’t wait, it’s so kind of you but I have to set up my gps etc” and say goodby then and there?