Childcare set up

I wondered that. If Friday is a company-wide early closing day, and not something the OP can move, I’d make that day the nursery day!

If the flexi working or nursery hasn’t already been arranged by now, though-I’m thinking the OP might struggle to find a setting!

This, I would do 2 days a week at nursery and one of DGP care. If you do it that way it is more likely the nursery can pick up the other day if when the GPs can't do it.

Do you have a place at a nursery that opens until 6.15? That would be unusually late here, many finish at 5.30 and I don't know any that run later than 6.

A friend did the grandparents drop off thing and lasted a month- she didn't like baby being away overnight and GPS didn't stick to her routine enough so it caused upset.

I think your little one will struggle to settle at nursery only going one day a week. Our nursery has a minimum of two days. Plus there's super long waiting lists for nurseries at the minute with the extension of the free hours. Also, just ensure you have a plan if your parents are unwell or go away

What's your rationale behind finishing early on Friday? That doesn't seem to have any obvious benefits

As already said by others, that's a really long day to be in Nursery - why can't you make your 3pm finish day the Nursery day ?
it is a waste of resources both of you being free after 3pm on a Friday to look after your child.

And 2 full days with an over nighter is an awful lot for other people to look after your child even if they are adoring grandparents.

Why not let them have him on Tuesdays and Thursday for the day, and he goes to Nursery on Wednesday and you pick him up at 3pm ?

I knew someone that did this for a while but she hated being away from the baby overnight, so she ended up giving up work after a couple of months.

If you go back in 2 months, have you already found a nursery who have said they’ll do just one day and have a space?

The things that I would worry about here would be:

How your baby sleeps - I don't think it's reasonable for grandparents to have to deal with night wakings and older people generally struggle more with lack of sleep (obviously it's Mumsnet so your parents are probably running marathons and cross country skiing at 75 so this may not apply to you)

How you would feel in practice about being away from your child for that much time every week - some people would find it harder in practice than in theory

How you and your DH would feel in practice about effectively having your parents as primary care givers alongside you - if you all get on brilliantly, it might be fine but it can lead to resentment and arguments

One day of nursery a week may be difficult to settle

How reliable your parents would be

I would personally do nursery Tuesday and Wednesday then overnight at your parents and they have him Thursday. I only say this as your parents will want holidays/there might be sickness and you will only need to sort one days childcare instead of 2.

They may also be keen now but a few months down the line that could change.

Children also tend to do better going to nursery more than once a week.

Would this still work if one of your parents became unwell? I am only asking because my Mum was my sister's childcare and then was diagnosed with cancer. That meant not only was she unable to look after my sister's children but didn't want them in the house either ie my Dad look after them. Sadly she died within a short time and then my Dad did take over with the children but by then my sister's youngest was mid primary. My parents had done childcare since they were 12 weeks old.

But my Mum died aged 62. Was fit as a fiddle before the diagnosis. So be prepared for 3 days in nursery as a default if anything goes wrong. Looking after a baby is exhausting when you are older so be prepared for things to change and they may find that being tied down 2 days a week is too much.

Lots of nurseries have a 2 day minimum policy but you might be able to get one that does 1 day.

If your parents would happily do more can't they just have him for the three days? One super long day at nursery will be miserable for him as he won't be used to it, he'll be knackered and will barely remember it from one week to the next. Or two days at nursery instead?

I'm not someone that has never been separated from their dc; I have used fulltime childcare (9-5) and my dc go to family for sleepovers so that me and dh get the odd weekend away but I couldn't have my baby away one night every week.

How far away do your parents live? Does he need to stay overnight?

I found a lot of nurseries and even childminders said the child needs to go for minimum 2 days

My MIL did something similar with my niece. It worked brilliantly - until niece was a very active toddler and then it was just too exhausting.

It's great that your parents are so besotted with your baby that they want to care for them for 2 long days. But be prepared to allow this plan to change over time. As a minimum I would suggest making your short day the Thursday so you can pick DS up earlier.

As others have said, lots of nurseries don’t accept children for one day a week as it’s quite unsettling for them, it’s normally a minimum of 2 days.

7.45- 6.15 is such a long day for a little one at nursery, most nurseries I’ve worked in are open 8am-6pm. I’d have my early finish on a nursery day rather than a day that dad or grandparents have your lo.

For me it all depends on what kind of sleeper he is. Mine doesn't sleep through the night so I wouldn't feel comfortable asking anyone else to have her overnight yet.
I don't think one day at nursery will be a problem once he's used to it, as long as he does settle sessions that are more frequent at first. Mine only does 2 days and she's fine.

1 day at nursery is not enough. It won't allow them to get into the routine. Many settings won't allow it.

Personally I'd go for a 9/10 day fortnight, to give you more time in the evenings as a family.

How old are your parents?. And have they cared for him overnight before? Loving him and wanting to care for him can be very different from doing it in practice every week for two days including an overnight stay.
It might work and it will mean he has a lovely bond with his grandparents but it will be much more tiring for your parents than they realise. I say that as a doting grandparent!

Have you contacted or visited any nurseries? Where I live there are long waiting lists and most nurseries insist on 2 days a week minimum. If you're due to go back to work in 2 months, it is actually pretty late to be sorting childcare.

I think you should do 2 days at nursery and 1 day with grandparents. Then if baby is not well enough for nursery (happens a lot to begin with) you could ask grandparents to do extra days. Once everything has settled down you could then add in some overnight childcare but personally I'd make it the weekend ie Friday or Saturday night so you can enjoy a lie in the next morning (rather than having to get up for work) and also see your child before and after the sleepover.

I wouldn't want to be apart from my child for 36 straight hours every week (which is what would happen in the scenario you're proposing).

Alot of nurseries require 2 days as a minimum so you might want to check that out. Plus not sure why you wouldn’t finish at 3pm on a day both you and your DH are working. Otherwise, sounds great!

Being besotted with grand-parenting a nine month old, and being physically and mentally capable of sole care of say a walking, nap dropping, tantrumming, constantly ill from nursery eighteen month old, for 36 hours straight, every single week, are two very different things. It’s a big commitment for your parents - mine were 60 when my oldest was born and they found a whole day with him as a toddler absolutely exhausting, never mind two days and an overnight!

Not saying don’t do it, but I would have a plan B.

Edit - why are you finishing work early on a DH day, not what is a very long nursery day?

I think it depends on your baby, it could be the dream. Or it could be really stressful for your baby, one very long day at nursery is harder for babies than several short ones, and then still tired they will learn they go to GPs the next morning and don’t get to come home. Only you can guess which way it will go for your baby though

Have both your work places agreed to this flexible working?

Many nurseries do operate a 2 day policy. So maybe you parents could collect from nursery have the baby overnight and do the following day.

I also think that one day at nursery might not be ideal. What's the back-up plan if your mum and dad go away on holiday, or are ill?