To be worried he'll be bitten again

31 replies

Rosebel · 21/04/2024 09:26

Okay hope this makes sense. One of the women I work with has a DD a bit younger than my DS. She invited us and some other people we work with, with similar age children to her DDs birthday party yesterday.
I wasn't too sure about going as DS has additional needs and can get overwhelmed. I spoke to the host and she said it fine if we left early.
Anyway went to the party and another parent from work was there. Her child bites, a lot and unprovoked so I was a bit on edge.
It all went fine and DS was doing really well. I went to the toilet and hear a blood curdling scream and I dash back to see this child's teeth clamped on his arm.
Now we all work in a nursery so I know it happens and I know it happens quickly but honestly I was so angry.
The child's mum did apologise to me and I said don't worry but I'm still cross. DS has a huge bruise on his arm which I will have to explain at nursery tomorrow.
But I feel really angry still and know I'm going to feel arkward around mum tomorrow. To make it worse currently DS and her DD are in different rooms but tomorrow she's doing a settle iin DS's room.
I just don't feel comfortable sending him in
DH can keep him home tomorrow but not long term. I know this child does have certain children she goes for and I'm going to be constantly on edge now.
Shout I talk to nursery? Hope for the best? Just go sick and remove him from nursery?
YABU leave it and stay at nursery
YANBU talk to the nursery and move him if he gets bitten repeatedly

OP posts:

Twistie · 21/04/2024 09:36

How old are they exactly? 18 months vs 4yo? Some children do go through a biting phase, which while is part of normal development, does of course cause instinctive revulsion. The key here is how is it being dealt with by the parents and nursery?

I wouldn’t keep my child away from nursery but I would let them know that your DC was bitten by this child (hence explaining the bruise), and can they keep a watch please. It could be a one-off incident, but if it happens again then the nursery need to be shadowing this child and dealing with it swiftly, as should the parents too.

My DS was bitten twice at nursery (age 3-4) by different children and it was a one-off incident in both cases. However, a friend’s child bit for years as he was never reprimanded whatsoever. He clearly thought my child was his own personal chew toy so I had to end the friendship, as my friend thought he was super cute no matter what he did. My point being - although being bitten is awful, there is a difference between a one-off incident and a child repeatedly targeting your child.

WhiteLeopard · 21/04/2024 09:36

You can't go sick and remove him from nursery. You need a proper long term plan. Talk to the nursery staff about your concerns or look into different nurseries.

TheFlis · 21/04/2024 09:36

Take him in, show them the massive bruise and ask what they are going to do to ensure it can’t happen again. I would say the same to the mother!

Loubelle70 · 21/04/2024 09:35

Talk to nursery and ask them to watch her and DS...the nursery has a duty of care towards your child in their care

Okayornot · 21/04/2024 09:32

You can't go sick and keep your child out of nursery, that is not sustainable.
Nursery should have a plan for this. Speak to them.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 21/04/2024 09:29

Surely the nursery have something in place to deal with children who bite? They cannot just let a child randomly bite other children. What is the parent doing to discourage this behaviour?

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