Washing up - is DH filthy or am I overreacting?

I can’t get over the number of people who have never had to think about each drop of water they use. What’s the water version of “making the penny squeak”?

If no one is getting sick, the job is being done right.

Our dishwasher broke a few months back and hadn't been replaced. I tend to do one of two things, both involving a basin of very hot water. First lazy method is bung everything in and soak for an hour, then empty water out, make fresh, and wash them while rinsing each under hot tap.
For big and greasy things, I try and add boiling water and detergent straight away then go mad with a scourer then a brush, then rinse under hot.
So yeah, your DHs method is not great. But if the dishes are coming out clean then I'd probably turn a blind eye.

You know that dishwashers fill up with water once and recycle that water over and over, right?

I got mixed up with your poll and answered wrongly.

We have a dishwasher but there are some things that have to be washed in sink. I don't have a basin and don't fill the sink. I wash under running water. Your husband is being a mink.

Before we had a dishwasher I never filled a sink full of water I just washed it under a running tao with a dishmatic. A sink full of water and dirt is just skanky to wash up in.

"filthy"

"disgusting"

"caught him"

But suddenly "light-hearted" after the responses disagree with you.

Aye.

So presumably you hand out cups of tea to guests with medical grade gloves on, and store all your cups in a sterile cupboard? Because otherwise, think of all that dust and grime that have got onto them since washing!

Trust me, literally nobody will be worried that a mug you are giving out may have been used by another person.

Fill the bowl, cleanest things through to dirtiest.

As long as it's visibly clean, it's absolutely fine. Rinse only if really needed, because fuck me it's a huge waste of water to wash under a continually running tap. Obsessing futher than that is just ridiculous.

I'm with your husband. Wash up cleanest to dirtiest and don't change the water. Don't waste water!

So you never have guests round and offer them a cup of tea or some food?

and tbh I don’t want even my own saliva sitting around on crockery in my cupboard - even when I was living alone I wouldn’t have!

Underwear goes in a separate delicates wash. Towels of all kinds go on hot wash. Also, frankly, I’m a bit squeamish about kitchen towels. I don’t like it that people wipe their hands on them seemingly for weeks without washing them and also use them to dry dishes (that haven’t been rinsed).

For me it’s not about germs and worrying about getting ill, so much as a general feeling of 🤢. And also I find things taste and smell like dish soap if they are not rinsed.

I’m not generally a clean freak, either - I have a toilet brush, I’m not too alarmed about dust, nobody has to take their shoes off in my house. I just want to vom when I see people washing dishes in cold grey dishwater they’ve used for the dog’s bowl, with chunks floating in it. Which seems to be really common here. Even among people with visitor-ready, shoes-off houses. I find it weird.

Half and Half for me.

I start with a small amount of soapy water in the bowl and then wash and rinse the things so that the water goes into the bowl. So cutlery and glasses and bowls to start. As the things get bigger, there is deeper water in the bowl for washing, yet everything gets rinsed as I go. If it fills up then I tip half out and carry on.

In reality though these days, I only wash the cat bowls up, everything else goes in the dishwasher. And I wash those under running water with no bowl. And I don't fill or empty the dishwasher, that's my OH's job.

We are closer to your DH's style in our house.
I tend to wash cleanest first, run another bowl when it gets dirty. Will rinse if anything is gritty (mashed potato residue is the worst for this 😂) or whatever.
DH usually runs a half bowl and gets most of the bits off then runs a full bowl and washes everything properly until its all finished, regardless of how dirty the water gets (bearing in mind he rinsed most of it earlier).
I still find bits on it when he skips the first step though and put stuff back to go round again. Beats having to do it all myself though.

The water doesn't need changing, no, but the dishes do need rinsing. If that's not a perfect compromise, I don't know what is

"... and people’s saliva…. "

Erm, the OP seems to be sharing cutlery and crockery with her husband. I think there's a fair chance that they encounter each other's saliva in other ways!

Why are people talking about washing underwear?

Unless you eat off your clothes, they don't need to be hygienic or clean in the way that dishes and utensils do.

@Bunnyhair would you wash them with kitchen towels?

I guess I don’t eat off my underwear. But maybe that’s just me being precious and uptight 🤷‍♀️

Well I do your husbands way but what I do is to rinse off dishes as I use them so I ill rinse off plates , pans , glasses bowls etc and then when I do the washing up the are mostly clean so the water doesn't really get that dirty

This

@Bunnyhair if we were all continually ill with stomach issues then you might have a point, but we don’t so that method of washing is okay.

If you have to rinse everything separately how do you wash clothes? Do you wash underwear with other clothes?

I'd probably change the water before it got that cloudy, but not if there were only a couple of things left. Neither of us rinse either.

We hand-wash kitchen knives, wooden things, stemmed wine glasses, one jug that eventually goes cloudy in the dishwasher, non stick pans (we only have one non stick frying pan and one we use for scrambling eggs), baking trays and roasting tins, thin plastics and the recycling (tins and plastics)

Having said that it isn't usually me who washes up.

I think we need to stop branding other people's habits disgusting. Humans aren't meant to be sterile!

#team dh