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Original poster

Washing up - is DH filthy or am I overreacting?

496 replies

Washingupfury · 20/04/2024 12:32

I have name changed for this. Dh and I have a disagreement about washing up water. He feels that you fill the sink, start with cleanest stuff eg glasses work your way through to the dirty stuff and no need to change the water unless the bubbles disappear, even if the water looks dirty.

I fill the sink, wash, rinse under running water, and if the water gets cloudy I change it.

I just caught him washing a cereal bowl in this:

I think it's disgusting. He thinks it is fine 'as it was the last thing to be washed'. We have agreed to abide by the MN poll for future washing up.

So, YABU DH is sensible and timesaving, of course the last few things will be washed in cloudy water.

YANBU DH is filthy and clean water and rinsing are the way to go.

Washing up - is DH filthy or am I overreacting?
OP posts:
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5
LimeReader · 20/04/2024 17:59

Agree with your - thats gross 🤢 I wouldn’t want to eat from things washed in dirty water

YeahComeOnThen · 20/04/2024 17:57

cardibach · 20/04/2024 13:18

Never rinsed in my life. Somehow I’m still alive. (And I've never tasted soap either).

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@cardibach
you really should wash the soap suds off. The chemicals are really not good for you (chemicals) and their purpose is to carry the food away, so you rinse it off

SplendidUtterly · 20/04/2024 17:53

"I also put bleach in my washing up bowl."

@Alwaysalwayscold

I do the same. Dishes just don't feel clean unless I add a splash of it to the water.

YeahComeOnThen · 20/04/2024 17:53

LoveSkaMusic · 20/04/2024 13:16

My water doesn't get that bad.

Are you not rinsing the plates off before washing them?

I rinse off the loose stuff (sauce, gravy etc), then wash up, then rinse the soap off before placing on the draining board.

Now I wonder if I'm doing it wrong! 😂

@LoveSkaMusic if you're using very hot water to rinse, you're 100% spot on!!

notmybear · 20/04/2024 17:45

crumblingschools · 20/04/2024 17:42

@notmybear and guess what it won’t make any difference to your health

No I know that.😅It’s a bit like children growing up on a farm rarely have allergies, but children growing up in sqeaky clean houses often have..

crumblingschools · 20/04/2024 17:42

@notmybear and guess what it won’t make any difference to your health

notmybear · 20/04/2024 17:40

ManchesterBeatrice · 20/04/2024 17:28

TeamDH

Next time I go to the UK I’ll have to remember that most people don’t rinse their dishes.. 😅😂🤢

QuickFetchTheCoffee · 20/04/2024 17:31

largeprintagathachristie · 20/04/2024 16:08

I remember getting my Brownie badge for - what would it be? - Housekeeper? Hostess? - and the method for dishwashing was the same as your husband’s.

cleanest items, glasses, first, then work through to the pots and pans.

I kept to that ever since as it just makes sense.

Yes, in the 80s there was The Brownie Cook Book with the instructions in it - I learned how to wash up from that using same method! My mum never had any issues with it.

Smittenkitchen · 20/04/2024 17:30

Thought it was fine until you said he doesn't rinse. Water doesn't look bad at all, just like it's got a bit of milk in it but I would always rinse.

ManchesterBeatrice · 20/04/2024 17:28

TeamDH

Nextweektoo · 20/04/2024 17:27

Yuk! You need to rinse. Always!

justanotherrandomperson · 20/04/2024 17:24

I don't change the water unless it gets greasy (which is why I save greasy things until last), but I do always take care to rinse with clean water and fully air-dry dishes. If something doesn't look/feel clean, I give it a squirt of clean soapy water and go over it again.

notmybear · 20/04/2024 17:19

aridiculousargument · 20/04/2024 17:15

no rinsing is disgusting. I can’t comprehend it.

I’m not british. I don’t know if anywhere else in the world doesn’t rinse.

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I agree (and I’m not British either).

But, in places like India some people don’t even wash their hands because they basically have so little clean water it’s either drinking it or ”wasting” it on things like washing your hands.

Clean water will likely be a rare thing in the future.

Unescorted · 20/04/2024 17:19

Soap/ scrub everything first with washing up liquid on a wet sponge and then a quick rinse to get rid of the suds.

Changing the water every couple of items is so wasteful on water and detergent. Not changing the water is a bit grim for the things at the end. So you are both doing it wrong 😉

aridiculousargument · 20/04/2024 17:15

Washingupfury · 20/04/2024 12:42

He doesn't rinse at all. If he did I wouldn't be so bothered.

Show quote history

no rinsing is disgusting. I can’t comprehend it.

I’m not british. I don’t know if anywhere else in the world doesn’t rinse.

Kalevala · 20/04/2024 17:12

crumblingschools · 20/04/2024 17:02

Surely the analogy to shower using less water than a bath only works if you are washing everything under a running tap at the same time (like a dishwasher)

I combine bath and shower as the plug is in to rinse after soaping everything with the sponge. The other things are semi rinsing in the accumulating bath water as I rinse individually. The sink ends up no more full than if I had run a bath in the first place, and everything is clean, not left with soap or grease residue from dirty water.

LeafyEmerald · 20/04/2024 17:12

On a water meter here. Dishwasher, but if handwashing, I would definitely be changing that water, and I would also quickly rinse everything.

crumblingschools · 20/04/2024 17:03

@Shoutinglagerlagerlager what’s your method then?

crumblingschools · 20/04/2024 17:02

Surely the analogy to shower using less water than a bath only works if you are washing everything under a running tap at the same time (like a dishwasher)

BubblegumBlue24 · 20/04/2024 17:01

Mine does this, but usually washes dirty or greasy stuff first, doesn’t rinse and everything ends up greasy , especially glasses, and I have to re-do them anyway. I’m with you on this one!!

It’s like multiple people using the same bath water one after the other 🤢

deveronvalley · 20/04/2024 16:54

I grew up in an unusual housing situation (for the UK) and all water had to be collected in a bucket from a spring outlet pipe some distance from the house. In the summer it ran very slowly! We absolutely reused water from hair washing to wash clothes in the twin-tub or leftover from doing dishes to flush the toilet etc. Obviously I’m teamDH! But I would change it towards the end if it’s obviously filthy and I still had cleaner things to wash. Frying pans and meat trays, well….

5128gap · 20/04/2024 16:31

Obviously your way is the gold standard and the most hygienic. But realistically as long as all the food is cleaned off, it's not going to hurt you. The waters hot, there's detergent in it, any germs wouldn't live long on the bowl and if they did they probably wouldn't make you ill. So personally saving time and water would matter more than any tiny risk from less than perfect washing. (The water would have looked better if he used a washing up bowl and tipped the milk dregs down the sink because it's cloudy from the milk out of the cereal bowl ill wager!)

Bignanna · 20/04/2024 16:25

Remaker · 20/04/2024 13:24

Judging from this thread, germ phobia seems to be responsible for a lot of water waste. Your DH’s way is fine.

People may be shocked to know that there are entire countries that don’t use washing up bowls. Why would you put a plastic bowl inside the sink? Makes no sense!

Of course it makes sense! Filling the sink means you can’t rinse stuff unless you have a double sink. Using a bowl of soapy water, changing it a couple of times then giving dishes a quick rinse is cleaner and more economical than a big sink of dirty broth! Plus it stops your sink being scratched.

BIossomtoes · 20/04/2024 16:22

Bollingerforbreakfast · 20/04/2024 14:45

It's a generational thing in my family. Older generation (and my late grandparents) used your dh's method although in a plastic washing up bowl. They were working class and running water was considered expensive. The tea towel would then take off any soap suds and other debris. All drying was done with a tea towel which wasn't even washed daily. I think that's a bit disgusting but the grandparents lived into their 80s and 90s and didn't die of washing up mank

My parents washed up DH’s way. They lived to be 97 and 99 and were never ill. I put absolutely everything in the dishwasher and if I didn’t I wouldn’t rinse because our water’s hot it would take the skin off your hands.

largeprintagathachristie · 20/04/2024 16:08

I remember getting my Brownie badge for - what would it be? - Housekeeper? Hostess? - and the method for dishwashing was the same as your husband’s.

cleanest items, glasses, first, then work through to the pots and pans.

I kept to that ever since as it just makes sense.