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Original poster

Rude or polite

567 replies

Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 12:08

I told him no

context is
a man approach me at the bus stop and said excuse me and I said no right away. He then came back and said you could of said I’m not interested.

no meant I wasn’t interested
no meant no

I stand by my no, but some friends/colleagues said I was rude and I don’t think I was.

ive said not interested in the past and got abused verbally.

I normally have my headphones in but I forgot them this morning

OP posts:
Anxiouslump · 18/04/2024 13:23

Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:17

What part he said you could said I'm not interested didn’t you understand in my first post

Edited
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You were rude to the man, and you’re being rude to this poster. Evidence so far suggests that you are quite a rude person.

One day, you may have need to approach a stranger, and when that happens, you will see how rude you have been.

Clarich007 · 18/04/2024 13:23

Definitely rude, to him and all of us on here trying to understand and help you !
What an attitude !

jaychops · 18/04/2024 13:23

Yes you were rude and arrogant not to give him the chance and listen to what he had to say.

Also, it's 'could have' not 'could of'...

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:21

nozbottheblue · 18/04/2024 13:20

I have read all your posts and you still haven't told us what he wanted.

Because she doesn't know. She had no clue. She just assumed.

nozbottheblue · 18/04/2024 13:20

I have read all your posts and you still haven't told us what he wanted.

Arlanymor · 18/04/2024 13:20

You preempted what he said, you turned out to be correct.

But I think: “No” is not polite whereas his suggestion of “No thank you, I’m not interested” is polite.

You don’t owe him any explanation, but saying no thank you is just better manners. Unless his approach to you was rude and/or aggressive but there’s nothing in the original post to suggest this.

Original poster
Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:20

inneedofaglowup · 18/04/2024 13:17

Why did you tell your friends and colleagues?

Why wouldn’t I

OP posts:
AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:20

Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:17

What part he said you could said I'm not interested didn’t you understand in my first post

Edited
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Maybe you could have written it a bit more eloquently if you want people to "understand"?

Original poster
Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:19

Christ on a bike read my first post he came back.

OP posts:
PossumintheHouse · 18/04/2024 13:19

Bloody hell 😂

And how did you bring this conversation up with your colleagues, out of interest? Because I can guarantee they think you're a bit of an arrogant plank now.

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:18

BrieHugger · 18/04/2024 13:16

Wow

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Indeed. The batshit crazy is strong in this one.

inneedofaglowup · 18/04/2024 13:17

Why did you tell your friends and colleagues?

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:17

5128gap · 18/04/2024 13:11

She assumed the guy at the bus stop fancied her. And she was right. Some women do attract a lot of men and know they do. Better to be straightforward about that than a lot of silly disingenuous 'ooh, what could he possibly have wanted with ordinary little me...?'

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Not necessarily right at all. In the absence of knowing what he wanted, which none of us do, not least because the OP is spinning the story with an obvious agenda, there's no way to ascertain whether he fancied her or not.

Original poster
Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:17

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:14

Should have waited.

You were rude. Massively. You have no idea what the poor guy wanted.

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What part he said you could said I'm not interested didn’t you understand in my first post

OP posts:
BrieHugger · 18/04/2024 13:16

This reply has been deleted

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Wow

OneTC · 18/04/2024 13:16

Was he going to hit on you or give you a "I just need 30p to get to a hospital where my daughter has been having a baby for the last 2 weeks"

HawkersEast · 18/04/2024 13:16

Rude. You didn't know what he was going to say.

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 18/04/2024 13:16

It wouldn't cross my mind that every male making contact with me was romantically interested, especially when opening with 'excuse me' - that to me is 'is this the right stop for/do you know the time/you've dropped something'

If his excuse me was to be followed up by any of the above, then yeah - it would have been extremely rude.

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:14

Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:13

his approach and body language but my colleagues think I was rude and should of waited.

Show quote history

Should have waited.

You were rude. Massively. You have no idea what the poor guy wanted.

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 13:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Oh, grow up. Is that the best argument you can throw at me?

I'm not a man. I'm female. I'm probably a good deal older than you though, out the other side of menopause, and grew up in a time where to be a ridiculous raging feminist with an obvious man-hating agenda wasn't the badge of honour it seems to be these days.

You're probably a TERF too, right?

Original poster
Dullardmullard · 18/04/2024 13:13

BrieHugger · 18/04/2024 13:07

@Dullardmullard when he first said excuse me, what was your reason for immediately shutting him down?

his approach and body language but my colleagues think I was rude and should of waited.

OP posts:
ohlookimbackagain · 18/04/2024 13:12

You’re not making much sense OP. Was he hitting on you? If so do these friends/colleagues think you should have accepted his unwanted advances out of politeness?

5128gap · 18/04/2024 13:11

AE9766 · 18/04/2024 12:55

Or she's just a Samantha Brick who assumes everyone with a penis fancies her. Far more likely from her OP.

Show quote history

She assumed the guy at the bus stop fancied her. And she was right. Some women do attract a lot of men and know they do. Better to be straightforward about that than a lot of silly disingenuous 'ooh, what could he possibly have wanted with ordinary little me...?'

bingobanjo · 18/04/2024 13:10

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BobbyBiscuits · 18/04/2024 13:10

This seems like he was or you assumed he was a scammer/beggar/perv? It's true you were not interested in speaking to him and I understand why. Especially after he didn't take no for an answer. It depends on the person doesn't it, or the day? I might be busy. They might look shifty.
But there's not much else you can say if you don't want to engage with someone. Other than pretend you're deaf.