To ask if there was ever a time in your life

When I was in my early thirties (twenty years ago).

I felt young and strong, l’d just met DH and had my dream job in my dream city.

I’m not unhappy now but man, I’d be 32 again in a heartbeat.

Being 9 months pregnant with my first child.

we had just moved into our first house. It was small but beautiful and it was ours. January. Maternity leave. Frost on the ground. Amazing views. Central heating. I pottered around unpacking boxes and getting ready for the baby while my husband was at work. I remember just feeling so rested and calm and at peace.

Now I have two children in school, and a bigger house, and a new job. I count my blessings every day but life is busy and relentless sometimes. Time has passed too quickly. I long to go back in time to that January, and have it all in front of me again.

For about 10 minutes in 2011. Someone actually came over to ask me if I was all right because I couldn’t stop smiling.

I see it more as ages.
I loved being 19, 23 , 27. Young with lots of opportunities. At 23 I lived on my own, I had lots of friends and lovers, I was good at my job, life was affordable and I remember thinking how lucky I was.

More recently, I feel contented hugging my daughter. I try to make every hug with her count and keep it as a memory to remember as she's growing up fast.

I’m 53 and there are only two short periods of time where everything was perfect.

the first was from 18 to 22. I was in love, having a great time in college, I had lost a lot of weight and finally felt like I fit in.

the last time was when I was in my late 30s to early 40s. The situation was similar- in love, had a great job, was in great shape.

sadly most of my life hasn’t been perfect or anywhere near it.

Yes my 20s. I had a job I loved, bought my own house, few flings, was thin and attractive, life was fun and I had lots of friends. Now I’m married, kids, SAHM, no major money troubles but I’m so unfulfilled and lonely.

Friends who are about 15 years older than me say the second golden years/golden time is dc adult and out the house, with their lives going well, grandchildren without unrealistic expectations of caregiving, and still well enough to enjoy life. For many this is late 50's - late 60's or so.

When I was in primary school.

My family was much larger. I had lots of friends. I lived in a village so had a lot of leeway to go and play at the park or in the stream without adult supervision. My school was everything to me. I loved going there. Maybe now, in my 40s, I may be only remembering the good things but I was happy.

And I should clarify it isn't the high medical needs that is stressful in itself, it's the systems, cutbacks, waitlists, etc.

I remember being at your stage and not fully seeing what a golden time this was. It's wonderful you can see it. At that stage I had some really good local friends, through various ways (was never a mum & toddler parent group kind of Mum) that were parents but we had other interests we clicked over. My job didn't take over evenings/weekends, dc were in such a lovely stage and while I'd never call grandparents easy per se, it was a good time for them and for their time in the dc's lives.

I have more dc now, but add in ailing grandparent (though won't admit this), a work role that never ever ever ends, significant expectations from a manager who doesn't ever switch off, a child with high medical needs, and issues for teens that aren't terrible, but aren't easy, and I miss those far more carefree days you mention. I'd go back if I could. It was a very golden time in our lives.

That's beautiful @YouAndMeAndThem

Yes, just driven back from dropping DS at Uni was thinking how happy I was :
in 1986 aged 10- enjoying being child but with lots of freedom loads of friends no academic pressure
in 1996 aged 20 - young and free and fairly gorgeous if I say so myself
in 2004 on maternity leave looking back at pictures I was just glowing.
2012-2020 Good job, enough money DCs at lovely ages (late primary, early secondary)
2020-2022 Was rough but things are better again now.

A few years late 30s/early 40s. It was bliss. It'll never happen again but I'm so glad I had those glorious years.

Yes. This is life. Appreciate the now.

I'm aware that now is probably a golden period of my life - our kids are young and love us simply and unconditionally. Anything can still be fixed with a hug and a biscuit. My parents are still in good health and I can still rely on them rather than them relying on me, which I know may be coming up in the next decade or so. My husband and I are doing well in our careers and are in good health. I'm self employed and can be with our kids as much as we need. I love going to all the little toddler groups and being there for our oldest after school. Our life is secure and stable. We don't have much money but we have what we need. To me, this is the golden age, and I try to appreciate life every day because I know how quickly it can change. If I think too deeply about it, it makes me sad that life could be downhill from here, so I try to just appreciate!

Yes. The pandemic from March 2020 to the following Spring. The sun shone endlessly, no one had to work, and it was a succession of huge gratitudes for small positives IME.

Nothing will ever compare.

No, there's not a perfect anything I'm aiming for. Everything a person can have is ephemeral, even if it seems otherwise.

I make plans, like anyone, but I'm conscious of that and that everything can change unexpectedly in a moment. I've been reminded of it many times. Take care you're not being unappreciative of all the things and people who are important to you.

What do you feel isn't good enough @AquaBee

I suspect that people are interpreting the question differently from each other.

Like @50yearsfreedom I've had days when I've just taken 30 seconds to look around and think "life is good" at virtually all stages of my life.
But I'm looking at the important things in life. As 50 years said - of course we've all got things that, given a choice, we'd perhaps have different (maybe things about our appearance or our salary or whatever) but it's the sitting back in the sunshine appreciating 'how lucky you are to have healthy dc and be able to spend a day at the seaside' moments that I think are 'perfect'. The family get togethers, or the fact your adult dc has found such a lovely partner, or when you hug your dh or your dc after perhaps hearing something awful on the news, or even something that happened to someone you know - you look around and appreciate all the good things.
I can't say that 'Life was perfect' for the year when I was 27 or 33 or 52 or any other year - life isn't like that. But it is a lot more about how you interpret the question.

Lots of moments like when your lay on a beach thinking life doesn’t get much better than this.
But general a few years ago when I first met ex-DP and was all loved up and in a happy bubble…until he cheated.

No. I have had brief moments of happiness, but real happiness, for months or years on end, never. It has been a very unhappy life - dysfunctional/enmeshed family filled with trauma, shit genes that left me prone to anxiety and depression, terrible MH problems in my teens, etc. Too late now. Some people are lucky, some aren’t. So it goes. Frankly, I wish I hadn’t had to go through it at all.

Yes now, mid 60s. But only on Wednesdays and weekends.

I feel like this most of the time. Not that things are completely perfect- I’d like to lose some weight, for example- but that the big things are- I’m very happily married, lovely children, a good job, we’re all healthy and love each other, etc. I’m very aware of the fact that these things might not always be true and that I might at some future point look back on now as a blessed time, so I try to appreciate that in the present as well.

17. I have flashes of it here and there. But 17 was my year 🥰

Yes. I was 32. The strange thing was, I knew it at the time. I remember thinking, this is it now, if this was the end of my life, there's nothing more I wanted. Not in a morbid way, just complete. I also knew it wouldn't last, and I was right. 22 years on I've had horrible times and lovely ones, but never that perfection again, and nor will I, as some of the people who made it that way are gone, and not having them there will stop perfect ever happening again.

Most of my life has been easy going and content. I've had a few runs were it felt like every single metaphorical traffic light was on green - but they can't last forever, can they?