friend asking me to go away - AIBU ?

This post is very contradictory:

have family at home and cannot just swan off
is the opposite of:
I can go if I want

It is interesting you have got so cross with being asked. Perhaps you are angry with your friend because you feel you can't go, and her asking has revealed it to you.

Your friend is right toa sk you if you want to do something, and it is fine to say yes please or no thank you, as you wish.

It seems like bank holidays hold a really special place in your heart OP. Maybe you and your fella don't get much leave together, and this is one of the few days you do? With the kids off school as well? If you like to keep bank holidays as special times when you do stuff together, then obviously that's fine.

However, most people don't feel the same about bank holidays (as you can see from this thread). So I don't think your friend is in the wrong, because she had no way of knowing you would feel this way......

You're definitely a "But I have a partner, so I can just drop my friends" type, aren't you.

She is not unreasonable to ask but you can just say no

Sounds like it was just a suggestion. You are massively over reacting. Just say you can't go & leave it at that.

Op you really got a bashing. I don't get why ppl are so shocked, you're just thinking of your family

no one is questioning the decision to stay with family - it is OPs claim that her friend is completely out of order for daring to ask her if she fancied a long weekend away. Maybe the friend was thinking she would like a break from the dh & dc?

So don't go.

If you don't want to go say so. But to have this attitude of how wrong she is says far more about you then it does about her.

YABVU. It was an invitation.

If you don't want to go or can't you decline. 'Thanks for asking, but it's not convenient for me'.

You sound very hard work, deciding she's out of order! Who knew it was offensive to ask someone if they'd like a weekend away?

YABU and very weird.
She asked.
You don't want to go.
Just say no, thanks, I've got plans with the family for the Bank Holiday weekend
The End.

I would prefer to stay with my family - not gonna lie I agree with you
but you are being unfair for thinking your friend is unfair for asking .

Why is it mean though?
I honestly don't get it!
You say yourself that you don't really do anything special on Bank Holidays, or have any expectations of them.
I'd understand if you usually do something special on them.
If you're just pottering around at home, there's no reason you can't go
Unless you don't want to which is also absolutely fine
Just say thanks but no thanks nicely to your friend if you don't want to, I honestly don't get the drama

No. It’s a nice idea of hers.

What a contradiction!

“doesn’t she realise I have a family and can’t just swan off??”

“they’d all be fine of course, and I can go if I want”

🙄

So go if you want, or don’t go if you’re desperate to spend the time with your family. Your strange bank holiday issue is yours, don’t try to push this onto your friend or make out she’s unreasonable for inviting you for a nice trip away! She probably thought you’d enjoy it! Maybe appreciate your friend a bit more, at least she’s bothering with you…

Very weird reaction. If you don’t want to go then don’t but I personally find it sad that you can’t be away for a couple of nights. I do it now and have a 5 yr old. Friendships are important. I find it even sadder that you think your poor friend is in the wrong.

What an overreaction. She's asked. You don't want to. End of. I do think your reaction is weird.

I go on a long weekend break abroad with my friends every year. DD is happy enough to spend the time with her dad or DGPs. She has a lovely time, so do I!

But asking is fine. That's actually nice, she values you as a mate. Just say "would love to but am busy with my family, how about XXX". She's not being a dickhead.

Why can't you? Please explain!

I can't help thinking of you poor friend, merrily going about her evening thinking - it'll be nice to get away with OP blissfully unaware that she has thrown the OP in to such a melodramatic tailspin she needs to ask the internet what to do!

Do her a favour and say no - I can't imagine what the weekend would be like...

AIBU friend want to go for breakfast - can I just swan off to breakfast just because I'm hungry

AIBU my friend wants a bath - I don't need the bathroom right now but it still doesn't sit right with me.

AIBU - friend wants to check out at 11am - despite checkout being at 11am it just seems selfish and wrong.

It's feeling kind of reversy. I'm waiting for the op to have their, 'It is I, Leclerc' moment and complain about her friend who won't join her on the trip.

Who cares if it’s a bank holiday? What do you usually do during a bank holiday that’s so special you couldn’t even consider this? It’s not like she’s asking you to go on Xmas day 😂 how weird.

But this doesn't explain why you think your friend is unreasonable to ask. "Surely she realises I have a family"... well, so? As you said, you take two weeks off by yourself every year so this is not much of a stretch to think you might be interested in going away.
Take ownership of your decision not to go rather than being pretend-offended that someone dared to suggest a weekend away.

Indeed