Thinking that women would benefit if they were more open minded about height in a potential partner…

I wouldn’t date anyone shorter than me - oh wait, unlikely as I’m 5’2 in heels. I wish my DH was shorter - he’s a full foot taller than me at 6’2. I feel like a child next to him. But I guess one of us needs to be able to reach the higher shelves in the cupboards - so he has his uses. It wasn’t originally his height that attracted me. Anything over 5’4 would have suited me.

This thread seems to be full of women who are 5 ft 9 to 6 foot. I very VERY rarely see women that tall in real life.

I am also amused by the amount of posters saying they are happy with their DH not being tall. And how his 5 ft 11 stature is just right for them. (Like 5 ft 11 is not tall.) 😆

And their comment is followed by 'he's a good 2-3 inches taller than me - so that's good enough for me' as a cheeky stealth brag that they are 5 ft 8 to 5 ft 9 themselves!

As I said earlier, there are so many posters on here who seem to regard being tall as some kind of achievement. And they always have very tall gangly children who are every athletic and sporty.

As I said though, I rarely see this many tall people in real life. The parallel world of Mumsnet strikes again!

Mine is slightly below 5’9’’ and it honestly isn’t an issue for me.

I’m about 165 and find a 10 cm / 4 inch and I find our height difference rather perfect, tbh. It’s great for kissing ;)

height may not be a secondary sex characteristic but it is still closely related to sex (and age).

which is why the majority of men are of the same height or taller than the majority of women (especially if that’s people of the same race, ethnicity and age). It therefore really isn’t surprising that this happens to correspond with many women’s preferences.

it would be considerably stranger if most women preferred men to be shorter than them. Or if most men had a strong preference for taller women!

Most men I know are below 6ft. None seem to find this a problem!

(My DH is 'only' 5ft 10in, which has always been fine for me)

Ignoring their instincts. Lowering the bar. I said we are able.l to spot artifice and arseholes. I didn't say all women do anything with that information.

Are you a man of diminutive stature, OP? 🤔

You only have to read the multitude of women on this thread saying that their preference is for men the same height or taller, I'm not sure where the 6ft thing comes from, data from OLD apparently, but it IS a thing that some women want a man who is taller than them, it's been proven on this thread alone.

Women on the other hand are far more highly tuned to subtle mating signals and factors. Some of them ignore their instincts, sure, but we've developed over thousands of years to be able to spot a wrong un. I think that's the chief problem these whiny men have.

Why do so many women end up with shit men (if MN is anything to go by) then, if we are meant to be so good at spotting wrong uns?

Haha, not sure in what planet you’re on but most of the time women go for the hottest! Especially if they are under 40

I can't believe people are arguing the validity of this claim. Taller men get way more advantages; this ranges from female attention to promotions in work.

I don't know what the big obsession is personally. I could not give two hoots about height. Being in shape, hairy chest, charisma, quiet self confidence are all a big turn on for me.

I agree with you OP btw. So many average men above average height being celebrated for no good reason.

Doesn’t bother me, or most people I know. Very tall women tend to end up with men of the same height or taller though imo. My DH is about and inch taller than me, shorter if I wear heels.

What planet are you on?

People like who they like. But the major criteria for choosing a lifelong partner is unlikely to be height. I think intelligence, integrity, values, goals, interests, are of slightly more interest.

I sincerely hope you've just got the hots for a short man and are just worried about your friends reactions - when in reality they don't give a damn what he looks like, if you and he are happy and good to each other.

I do think short men have a dating disadvantage, but so have overweight or less attractive women. It certainly doesn't mean they won't find anyone, especially if they've got a lot to offer elsewhere. People who aren't conventionally attractive get partners all the time. When I think of the few people I know who have never had a significant relationship, I really do not believe that it's solely down to how they look; they are perfectly ordinary looking people and worse looking people get partners all the time.

I've noticed that I'm taller than quite a lot of men at the gym (I'm 5'6"). Maybe some of them are making up for it by working out. Some of them are very good looking and well built.

I'm not so sure. My ex is 5 foot 5 and when we met he had a history of being turned down by women who specifically told him he was too short.

I don’t think women do this in real life, I think this myth comes from men blaming their incompetence on their short stature rather than heir other shortcomings.

Height has never bothered me, in fact I dated two men at/ over 6’5 and they both suffered with back problems - and shopping reality was getting stopped in every isle to get something off a high shelf for someone 😅.
DH is 5’10 and perfect!

I’m 5ft 8 so want a guy taller than me, so 5ft 10 (or on tinder a guy that said 6ft as most lie about their height ;-) ).
personally, it’s annoying when females of say 5ft 4 say they only want the 6ft guys- surely a 5ft 8 guy would be perfect for them & leave the taller guys for the taller women lol!!

I've never dated anyone taller than me, but then I'm over 6ft in heels. It's also quite challenging to find a decent man who is willing to date someone taller than them I find.

So no I don't think that women would benefit from being willing to date shorter guys unless shorter guys are willing to date taller women.

I also think attraction is what it is to an extent.

I've never met a living soul who cared how tall men were. My husband is just 6ft, but i wouldn't be good at gauging height and I didn't know this when I met him. It of course was not his height that attracted me.

Both our adult sons are under 6ft, neither of them have ever had issues over their height, or problems finding lovely partners. It's just been a total non issue.

I'm thinking through my friendship and family groups and we have loads of shorties and none have had problems.

I think maybe if that's the lens on acceptability, then some people are really missing out....but who wants a partner with such shallow ideals?. All the short men in my life have found lovely partners who like them for so much more than what they look like or how tall they are...

People can exclude anyone from their dating pools for any reason they want. There's nothing "needless" about it. I excluded men from certain religions and cultures, and men with certain jobs from my dating pool. Is that also "needless"?
Agreed. It's such a shame that women saying "no" to men upsets some men.

I imagine they have a very fragile sense of masculinity. The decent men who are secure in themselves rarely seem to be so animated about not being someone's cup of tea, and don't feel the need to berate women for liking other men.

It's also a shame that some women feel the need to tell other women off for having dating preferences, suggesting they need a good enough reason to say no.

OK. You first …

Honestly, it's not height that prevents me dating, it's the sheer fuckwittery of most me.

needlessly excluding

People can exclude anyone from their dating pools for any reason they want. There's nothing "needless" about it. I excluded men from certain religions and cultures, and men with certain jobs from my dating pool. Is that also "needless"?

Am 5.11 definitely don't want to feel the butch one. Tall men only for me!